The Beautiful Skin That I Am In

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I am a thinker, a challenger, a truth teller and seeker.

It is very good to observe, question, talk about, and evaluate the many things that are going on in the world and around us.

By nature, I was always the type to thoroughly analyze and investigate. I was never easily influenced by anyone or anything simply due to something being laid out as fact or generalized as standard/normal, because I was very strong willed and had a very strong competent mind of my own.

As a female, I have experienced ridiculous bias that was foreign to me growing up. It was foreign because I never knew that I was supposed to be restricted in certain areas as far as my gender was concerned.

Society likes to dictate how a woman should be, act, think, and feel when the only way that I truly know how to conduct myself is naturally. And that is the same way that I will always continue to do. My character and disposition contradicts the stereotypical role and definition of a female. And no one will ever be able to stop or change me.

I’ve heard the most absurd things from assholes, including low scale women. “She’s too hard for a girl”.

I never knew as a woman that I was supposed to be weak! I had never been that way in my childhood or teenage years and certainly not in my adulthood.

“When a man say is how it goes”.

I never knew that a man’s words spit out gold and authority especially when he is not speaking truth! I have never heeded or been affected by anybody’s opinions or scolding that did not appeal or apply to me and my philosophies, whether they were male or female.

I know and am well aware that there are jealous/envious sick-minded people, and people who will always go around telling and spreading silly and vicious lies on others. This type of behavior goes on everyday and everywhere.

A rumor that I had found very strange about me is the one about my skin or face. Ever since I was a very young girl I have always been pretty and very attractive. I’ve had good skin and a nice grade of hair. And none of that is really important; however, it contradicts what my enemies were trying to do.

From my comprehension I believe that they wanted to give me a complex or a low self esteem, just another one of society’s ploys to keep a young and bright woman down by attempting to make her feel insecure about herself.

The biggest mistake that those in particular made is generalizing me. I am my own individual. And instead of playing into the obnoxious mind games, I learned from the ignorance of others. They showed the knowledge and the common sense that they lack, and the insecurities that they themselves actually have.

I have never ever had a skin problem yet my enemies had worked a black magic spell years ago for me to “breakout” then have people taunt me with lies. These stupid rumors went on for years with these chosen few sick people. And I never understood it.

Till this day I still do not understand it. When I was a teenager they tried to put in my head through black magic that I looked hideous and I never fell for it.

Beauty is indeed in the eyes of the beholder but I’ve never been an ugly person. And not that it matters-a lot of other people considered me to be pretty too. I have my own eyes. I can see myself for who and what I really am. What an insult to think that I would have been dumb and weak minded enough to not know better. Such stupid asses!

Why are and were they so hung up on my looks? I know why. A lot of guys were attracted to me and could not have their way with me because I had too much self love and confidence. Another reason why is that so many women have allowed themselves to be dogged out by men due to their own battles with low self esteem.

Everybody has their own motives for why they are sick and malicious and do what they do.

It all stemmed from jealousy, but my enemies all went about it the wrong way. If I ever did come to develop a skin problem such as acne it definitely would have not affected my self confidence. Things like that do not faze or bother me.

The most beautiful girls have breakouts due to allergies, their menstrual cycles or hormones and it is no big deal. I know that my hormones act up sometimes during my period. It is natural. I had to learn that I was rare in my thoughts about this matter. I realized that many people do associate a blemish, bump, or spots on the face with low self esteem and I think that is so sad.

There are people with clear skin who are as ugly as hell and they want to crack on attractive people with minor shit that holds no significance.

Only a true fool would ever come to the conclusion that I would feel bad or insecure about myself over breaking out with something. I always had a pretty face and complexion. I love the way that I look. I like my naturally oily skin that keeps me looking young in appearance. I like my slim/thin figure. I like myself.

This garbage is no different than a woman being regarded as a bitch or a slut, two other words that do not faze or bother me. And I’ve seen women go crazy over being called a “bitch”.

One lady acted as if she wanted to kill me over calling her one. I didn’t even mean it in the way that the rest of the world uses it. To me it was more of a way of saying “you asshole”.

The bottom line is that the world is a sick place full of good, mediocre, and evil people. There will always be those who will come along to try to break people’s strengths, play on their weaknesses if they have any, and destroy their spirits.

And sometimes it happens more so when you are a woman. Society loves to prey on and beat down women by bashing their reputations and physicality, coercing them into buying into submission and repression for meanness, power, selfishness, and personal gain.

There are individuals who will fall for the games and those who will not. And there will be those who will get confused.

I keep my ears and eyes open. I take everything in then sort it all out. I enjoy my life and my discoveries. It is a blessing to not get caught up in all of the nonsense.

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2 responses »

  1. Pingback: Authentic Expression | "My Voice" Weblog By Miss LaToya Lawrence

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