I received Christmas gifts from managers when I worked in retail.
In my field of health care, I have had appreciative clients for no special occasion who had slipped me money for their appreciation of the work I did for them.
Before I left work late yesterday afternoon, one of my client’s relatives handed me a Christmas card with money.
I remember years ago when another client’s daughter handed me a Christmas card with two hundred dollars because she appreciated the work I did.
I have encountered nice people who were not just generous with their money but with their time and other acts of kindness and concern toward me.
The thoughts coming from these people are enough for me as I rarely accept money or gifts when asked what it is that I want- even from family or friends.
If people really want to give me something they will have to do it without consulting with me first because I do not ever want anything no matter how odd that may sound.
I have always been this way.
My mother would tell anybody that as she knew firsthand. She used to sometimes innocently fight with me as she did not understand the reason I did not take advantage of items she wanted to buy me when I was a teenager.
It is beautiful though when people give from their heart to show gratitude, love, or just because it is within their nature to be thoughtful or nice.
The true meaning of Christmas itself is to celebrate the birth and life of Jesus Christ, but there is nothing wrong with attributing this day with merriment and gift-giving.
Still and all, the most precious gifts in life cannot be bought or sold wrapped up and used to eventually be thrown away. Some material possessions do last a lifetime, but people and connected relationships last forever.
The best gifts on earth we have are each other (the one or ones that you love and who sincerely love you whether it is a pet, a genuine friend, or a treasured family member.)
Whether one believes this or not, even if there is no one in your corner, all one truly needs is God as he will provide and secure your future as well as maintain your strength and character.
When we accept Jesus, we receive the most significant (vital) gift of all- eternity.
I am a very honest, straightforward person. If I say or write something it is because it is the truth, what I really think or believe, or suspect is possible.
Never do I or have I ever intentionally expressed anything under false pretense.
Some people may not understand what I mean or where I come from at times- depending on who it is- because I am a very deep, intelligent, and spiritual awake person.
Nevertheless, I speak my mind and am led by spirit to fulfill my purposes. I do know what I am talking about when I speak on things.
I am a forty-seven-year-old female who often gets mistaken for someone in her twenties or thirties. I have never really looked my age in body or in the face.
I even have a young sounding voice when I speak.
I have attracted men of all ages- young and old within the past.
When I was in my thirties eighteen-year-old guys were attracted to me, when I was in my twenties forty and fifty-year-old men were attracted to me.
It never made a difference. To each his or her own I never received any personal gratification from this attention I never wanted it.
Some men found me to be a challenge that they wanted to conquer. Some men just genuinely wanted to be with me because they liked me for my mind, and I was not like the average female once they got to know me a little.
I never placed value on myself based on whether a man approved or desired me. I have never suffered from low self-esteem and have never needed anyone to validate me or to build my assurance.
Self- confidence, self-love, and self-worth are things produced within me. No one gave it to me, and no one can take it away. Everyone should feel this way.
I have no interest in romantic relationships, I am asexual and proud.
Now I want to discuss this issue about Michael Gonzalez because I am being led to by spirit.
As I am a highly spiritually inclined individual I feel and keenly discern people’s energy.
Whenever a man, especially men who are of a negative disposition are attracted, or interested in me- I can feel them, their thoughts, and I can accurately sense things in relation to them in a timely frame.
From the first moment I laid eyes on Michael, I did not find him to be attractive.
He is not a cute guy, and he is not handsome as far as I am concerned. A friend of mine had saw a photo of him and said that he was not attractive to her also but that he seems to think that he is something. Maybe there are low-scale females who find him attractive, however, I do not and never will.
I was very insulted when Michael reflected his insecurities onto me while we worked together by entertaining the ridiculous idea that I could be attracted or interested in him.
I told Michael to his face that I could not stand him, but his inflated ego did not want to believe or accept it even though deep down inside he knew it was the truth.
He even profiled in front of me one day on the job by trying to show off his body that was not appealing to me whatsoever. He got down onto the floor to demonstrate push-ups. The incident turned me off.
The more I had got to know Michael the more I disliked him.
When some men try to impress women, push themselves on them, or try to flaunt themselves when they mistakenly assume that the female likes them, they do not realize how much they make a fool of themselves. It is very off-putting.
When I was younger there were guys (usually low-scale guys because guys of substance do not behave in this manner) who would get angry at me for not wanting them and in return tell lies about me.
There were three who were a problem.
Two lied and said I was involved with them and all three wanted people to believe that I slept with them or had feelings for them- all to make themselves appear big in the eyes of their peers. And, to also try to bring me down since I thought too highly of myself to desire or to be with anyone like them.
Neither one of these guys were desirable they were used to low-scale women such as themselves falling all over them and making a fuss over them due to their own bouts of low self-esteem.
Someone like me, who was of substance and class, added an extra blow to the bruise they received to their egos when they got hurt and rejected by me.
Of course, their efforts did not work so they joined in with the effort to work Brujeria (Black magic/Santeria) on me to try to make me look bad within the public eye, however, I was still too strong, and I successfully defeated all of them at their own game. On top of it, karma came back and destroyed all three of them. One even ended up dead years ago from his negative lifestyle.
No one can bring me down as I never cared what anybody said or thought about me.
I did not have time for that type of bullshit then, and I do not tolerate it now.
Michael is not at all drastic to that extreme his nonsense is mild in comparison, yet still an act of ridiculous nonsense.
With all the serious things going on in the world Michael is hung up on the fact that he cannot attain me.
He would rather believe that I really do have feelings for him and am just fighting it, or that I am playing hard to get, or whatever other delusional bullshit that men feed themselves instead of facing the truth over dealing with reality.
Michael needs to forget about me and realize that a woman of my level and caliber would never be interested or attracted to him.
Michael has a lot of negative energy. He has a very low vibration.
I am a positive person I exude from a very high vibration.
What I also believe is a part of Michael’s insecurities stem from his background of being morbidly obese.
Maybe after he lost weight, he feels he needs something to prove and is overcompensating.
He needs women to be interested or attracted to him to feel like a big man. I just wish he would find some other female to win over to measure or to prove his false sense of pride.
The other women he has been with are easy tramps. He feels if he can get me then he can get anybody. I should in a way take this instance as a compliment, but I am not flattered by it, I am disgusted.
To me, Michael will always be a small, unworthy, pretentious smelly fish swimming in a dirty pond.
I am not trying to be mean I just do not understand the sickness behind and within certain men and women (because there are deceitful, trouble-making women too) who cannot deal with rejection.
A healthy-minded person does not occupy themself with stupid shit like this.
In 1986 a man was going door to door on the block of my neighborhood looking for potential customers for the cable TV service that he worked for or represented.
I was ten or eleven at the time, excited at the chance to have the opportunity to watch a selection of cable channels as I was a huge young movie and television buff back then.
I called out to my mother after answering the door. She came downstairs and we both listened to his pitch.
The representative showed us a brochure of the service he promoted, offering us a choice of bundles along with prices.
My mother decided to purchase a cable plan.
The name of the service was BQ Cable- which stood for Brooklyn and Queens.
Later in the years- I do not remember exactly what year- BQ Cable was called Time Warner Cable.
Then later, after further years, to the current, the name of the service was changed to Spectrum Cable.
This instance reminds me of two other establishments from the past to the present.
When I was a little girl there was a bank titled Manufacturer Hanover.
This bank was later changed to Chemical Bank which now is called Chase.
There was also a telephone company called New York Telephone that eventually changed to NYNEX.
Afterwards, NYNEX became Bell Atlantic which is now called Verizon.
I know all this history for a fact because I and my family were with these companies (long time customers from the beginning) through their entire change of ownership and whatever else took place when these establishments expanded or advanced.
In this life of unpredictability, we sometimes know what to expect while oftentimes we experience the unexpected.
Once it seems that everything is under control and running smoothly another thing may pop up. Sometimes to the extent that will make one ask “What’s next?!”
When situations or circumstances seem to come at you all at once just give it to God.
When particular occurrences appear to be an overload or too much of a burden- let it go.
Why stress when we can rest our significant matters into the hands of the Lord?
I have noticed at the most troublesome of times there was no actual distress caused to me as I was not troubled by the happenings around me.
In the same, when I did become concerned about events, I was still able to genuinely laugh, be at peace, and persevere with an uncanny strength and confidence although I dreaded going through the undesirable seasons due to being tired of periodic trials.
When we continue to look and seek beyond instead of what gives the impression of an unfavorable condition that stands directly in front of us, we can endeavor to surpass through the aid of the one who has the power to bypass every storm of the weather.
It all started around the age of two or three years of age that I threw a fit inside the department store.
My mother said she had to take the last of her money to buy the Big Wheel low-ride that caught my eye as soon as I had spotted it on display.
My mother’s money did not go to waste.
I rode that Big Wheel up and down the block of our neighborhood and everywhere else when I was supervised by an adult.
I had a high-ride tricycle prior to the Big Wheel that I barely rode. I was not enthusiastic about the red three-wheeler as it later collected dust in the garage.
The color of my Big Wheel was red and yellow. I wore the plastic out of the rider I rode it so much. It had partially split in half.
I loved my Big Wheeler!
When I had gotten a little older my uncle bought me a blue colored bike with training wheels.
When it was time for the training wheels to come off my mother taught me how to ride holding my balance. I learned fast all in one day.
Afterwards, there were other children on the block of our neighborhood who asked my mother to teach them how to ride their bikes without training wheels since their parents had not shown them yet.
In between the periods of the Big Wheel and bike I also enjoyed riding the wheels of my roller’s skates and hot-pink colored skateboard.
Though the skateboard did not interest me nearly as much as the other apparatuses.
Before I hit my teenage years, my mother purchased me a 10-Speed bike.
The last time I rode a bike was in the year 1998.
Bike riding was always a fun, enjoyable activity for me. From childhood riding through the streets with my puppy chilling in the basket of the handle-bars, around corners, and up and down steep hills.
Riding in groups with other neighborhood children reveling in the hot mornings, afternoons and evenings of spring and summer.
I had some wonderful times with a bicycle.
Bicycling as an adult in the quiet of the night, under the calm leaves of trees. Refreshing air blowing amid a breeze while going to get something to eat or something otherwise are just pleasurable accounts to remember.
The first time I ever went ice-skating I was twelve years of age.
A neighbor took me, her daughters and my god-brother to Rockefeller Center in Manhattan, New York.
I learned how to ice-skate that evening almost immediately.
The activity on ice was exciting and fun.
Since then, I have been down that area of Rockefeller Center plenty of times passing through but never have I been back to the ice-skating rink.
Far before that time I recall going to a roller-rink with my mother and associates from our neighborhood.
I was a little pro at Roller-Skates on the sidewalk and streets of Queens, New York but at the rink with the strobe-lights and disco music is seemed as if the floors were actually spinning so I stayed on the sidelines and watched my mom skate around the floor with the help of a gentleman who helped to hold her steady on her feet.
Fast forward ahead at the ice-skating rink where my god-brother at the time was gliding in between two friendly girls who helped to hold him on his feet after he had fallen onto the ice a couple of times.
We (my god-brother and I) laughed at the situation as we had a sense of humor that was out of this world.
My puppy got in on the action as she would run to pull me along as I held her leash while on my roller’s skates through the streets.
She also loved running beside me as I rode my bicycle up and down the block.