I just had to say it again I love all my blogs (all nine of them ❤) and I love blogging.
One of my friends keeps telling me that she cannot wait for me to write and publish another book.
She loved the two I wrote and published years ago.
The thing about us true writers, though, is that we must wait until the energy comes upon us to make that move.
We do not just come up with the material/information instantly the material and information in detailing whatever it is that we are going to write and how we will proceed within our creative process has to materialize upon us when it is ready to reveal itself to us.
Then we can instantly and automatically vibe into the essence of our projects.
That natural energetic direction puts us into mode while it instinctively guides and provides us with stimulation.
This is why I do not rush and try to make myself come up with an idea that does not manifest, because the timing may not be right and things may not work out accordingly, just as I do with blogging. The information or ideas will naturally come to write itself.
This is how it happened when I published my very first novel along with the second one.
The ideas came to me spontaneously and the books wrote themselves and everything was successful in completion and timing.
I have an unpublished manuscript that I had copywritten twenty years ago. I am planning to work on getting this material published next until I get inspired to write and publish more books when they are meant to be.
I know one of the things I was put on this earth to do is write so when the urge hits I will be a willing vessel and participant to comply with continuing to do what I love and enjoy doing.
I am not one to, or one who, ever ran around in a crowd. I was mostly a loner who was particular in who I chose to be around.
I received a happy belated birthday card with a token of money this past week from someone who was determined to show their regard.
They had told me my card was on the way last month before my birthday had arrived.
I told them not to worry, that there is no rush, and to take their time as well as with the other things in their life.
We all may go through periods of not getting to something done or intended to toward a specific time frame for whatever reason.
I also added that anyone can give someone a card or material possession that really means nothing. What really counts is when things come from the heart.
When people care about you, give of themselves- spend quality time talking with you, or being there for you if there is ever a time you may need them, truly believing in you, encouraging you and having your back when a moment calls for it.
People who are like this and do these things because they like, love, or appreciate you- not because they feel they must or should react or respond that way, but because they really want to- shows a true friend or person that is genuinely in one’s corner.
This person I speak of has known me literally for all my life and is a real person.
We even share a lot in common such as writing, having spiritual abilities, and so on.
She is a very smart person too who is on the level just like me.
I was always lucky to have, and be blessed with, certain people in my life.
We are more like family than friends.
I lay in bed not to get up right away during mornings when I do not have to.
Resting my body in comfort in the calm of the room, daylight reflecting through my window.
The sound of birds outside chirping as I also listen to winds blow, raindrops, or whatever it is that may flow in the weather.
I sleep like a baby and treasure most nights when I get the adequate rest that I need.
Moments of peace and calm are precious.
Having time to release oneself and to contemplate is essential.
The musing and concentration of reverie through meditation is a natural mode to fall into.
I often find, and have found myself, automatically at the helms of involuntary meditation.
Those times when our eyes just close at random to direct us at what is intangibly calling to our attention, seizing us in a moment of unifying with the universe consciously and subconsciously.
Aside from this reflective form of energizing and reprising, near bedtime is also my favorite time to connect spiritually to divine inspirations.
I do not go to the beauty parlor, I do my own thing. I live as simple as possible, relaxed and comfortable.
My scalp be itching like crazy because my hair is growing.
My hair grows like wildflower just as it did while I was in my twenties- fast and furious, bushy and untamed.
It straightens out more when it is wet and that is how I style it tied back all in the natural without any chemicals.
As all grass really needs is sunlight and water to nurture and to grow from the roots in the soil- I trained my head of healthy growing grass to survive through nature- by watering my strands/scalp, eating nutritiously, and letting the air take rest of the care.
I have quite a few hobbies that I enjoy and occupy myself with from time to time when I have time or am in the mood.
I learned to crochet at nine or ten years of age. Knitting was too complicated at the time as I preferred to use only one needle to creatively loop yarn.
Crocheting was an activity I enjoyed during my teenage years too.
It is fun coming up with ideas to experiment with different patterns in addition to shopping through arts and craft stores to look over various colors, styles, and textures of yarn.
Very cute and useful household items or homemade gifts tend to result from the inventiveness brought forth by craft.
One, and many have already, can make a professional business out of designing materials made out by hand.
My mother had crocheted me a beautiful baby blanket when I was an infant. My mother also knew how to sow professionally and put together a fantastic, lovely dress she manufactured totally on her own with her sowing machine- she was a woman of multi-talent.
Till this day, I am still fond of crochet. I also love needlepoint stitchery.
You are the first person I ever met, someone who I will never forget.
You held me close, looked out for me the most- you deserve a toast.
You gave me courage and inspired me; you encouraged the person I aspired to be.
You comforted me in my moments of dread, always made sure that I was clothed and fed.
You were so engrossed –you deserve a toast.
You combed and brushed my hair, you put me to bed and taught me prayer.
You were my greatest host- you deserve a toast.
You had so much style, I have not seen you in a while- I really miss your smile.
I thought we would live to see old-age here wherever, as you were one who had it all together.
I had no idea you were going to depart- only to tear my world apart.
Something has held me up- as you went on your way up– to the upper-place without a trace.
I am still running my race; I cannot wait to see your face.
I hope you are finally at peace that faith inside at least gives me some ease.
I always loved you so much, your memory still touches my heart.
I wish I could have given you so much more, you deserve the beauty that God has for you in store.
I do not mean to brag or to boast, but my mother deserves the greatest toast.
Cheers to you, I am forever endeared to you. – latoya lawrence
None of us are one hundred percent all the time. We can mistake one thing for another, and so on.
There are times when we are unsure or just do not know. And even when we doubt, we can still be correct in what we may have slightly felt. We can even be wrong in things we strongly feel.
For the most part, aside from logic and reasoning from an ordinary standpoint, my clairvoyant abilities have always been very intuitive and on point. There have been people who have admitted to me or told on themselves unintentionally when I confronted them on matters. Either that or the truth would in time reveal itself to confirm things.
When I write I do not plan. Messages come to me to write themselves as ideas manifest and urge to be put forth for which I know not to question when the drive is strong.
I am a vessel where information transmits- a messenger sort to speak from a spiritual perspective- relaying what needs to be said and heard for whatever purpose relayed unto me as one who knows firsthand.
Extra Sensory Perception is a legitimate gift/faculty that some of us have and are born with.
It may be something that everyone cannot talk about with everybody due to misunderstandings and diversity in beliefs, yet it makes the instance no less of a real occurrence and the gift is nothing to be ashamed of or hidden.
Extra Sensory Perception can save one’s life.
One thing about us people who are in-tune is that we are keenly perceptive at picking up on the slightest things that others may not notice or spot as significant.
Oftentimes, or at times when we are on to things or on to someone with evil intentions, schemes, or motives- those who know they have been discovered or those who are naive to the areas of paranormal ability and how it naturally works within the nature of energy, vision, and vibration, will try to cover up their actions or justify their ignorance by calling one paranoid. It is the oldest trick in the book.
We may falsely get accused of saying or thinking that everyone is against us when that notion is totally absurd.
How could, and why would everyone be against us? Everyone does not know us or even care to be against us.
We know who and what to pinpoint and why and if we are not sure we are specific until we later get clarification.
There will always be people in life at times that we may possibly encounter either through feelings of jealousy, revenge, conflict, pettiness, ignorance, or animosity or whatever ignites incentive within them depending on the circumstance and their disposition who will come up against us in some form or fashion.
The devil exists and he uses people as well as principalities.
The only difference is that not everyone is always aware of what is going on in the situation, the depth of what may go on, or to what extent, the reason behind it, or the measures involved.
We are given these extra sensory abilities which are an extraordinary extended form of intuition, discernment, and second sight as a protection and awareness throughout life to heed, learn from, and grow on the path of our journey.
I would not have had the faith I have today without it due to the many encounters of account from early life experiences to the present.
It has been a constant occurrence- an irrevocable part of one’s make up given by God as an example of his power manifest unto the universe linked in connection to those who are endowed.
This does not mean everyone with the ability is up to good or is good-natured. It just means they have a supernatural attribute that testifies to the powers that exist and that are in effect in this physical world.
And whether a person is good-natured or negative-natured with the ability to see into the unseen does not foreshow their gifts of perception into events as paranoia.
Aside from writing being a gift, talent, hobby that many of us share and enjoy- writing has been a lifesaver to me, an outlet.
A cathartic way for me to express my feelings, release my truths and connect to the universe on a spiritual level that is fulfilling to me.
I am truly thankful and grateful for a healthy way to utilize my writing skills as a source of inspiration as well as productivity.
I have been told directly when I was a teenager and during my adulthood that I was not “normal” by three people because I am very unique.
Some meant those words as an acknowledgement to me that I was uncommon to them as others have used the term toward me as an insult.
But what these few who said this to me, whether it was a harmless mention or one to intentionally hurt, did not realize is that their words were a huge compliment to me.
It made me feel good to not be categorized as being the same.
No one can drown out my voice or my existence. Though, I have always detested the existence of those who I feel should not exist.
I am one who could never conform to the so-called norm of what is considered normal- to do as others do and to think as others do.
To accept and adhere to the approved dominant set of principles, rules, or standards within the characteristics and behavior carried out by most of society.
It was never my inborn tendency to behave according to socially accepted conventions or typicality.
I often rejected, and refused to comply or go along with what went against my nature or way of thinking, being, and doing due to my unconventionality.
I prefer my original, unusual, different, so-called strange to some, out of the ordinary, original, new-fashioned disposition- because it is the real me.
I never had the desire to join in- that is why I always stood out.
I hated whenever people tried to manipulate or coerce me by subtle means trying to use psychology, head games, or their way of reasoning to undermine, challenge, or change my attitude and ways through passing unfavorable judgment upon me, downplaying me, turning against me, or underestimating me.
These actions never caused self-doubt or fear within me to surrender to just be accepted.
Oftentimes it infuriated me or caused me to pleasantly distance myself from those kinds of individuals.
My resistance has caused in many instances among those who were in opposition or who were incongruent, great friction between us.
This is why I am a leader and not a follower because I never went along with society because it was the thing to do or else, I would be an outcast or labeled or considered crazy.
I refused to be what I was not to please others and lie to myself just to get by.
I have received backlash or so-called consequences for doing things my way that others did not understand or interpreted their way as they could see no other way due to their own social conditioning and/or lack of awareness or knowledge in diversity.
Yet, all the occurrences did was make me more determined to maintain my identity and to continue to be who I am.
If anyone is to criticize me, laugh at me, call or consider me insane for sticking to my guns, then so be it.
Nothing can deter me from loving the person within me.
To me, certain others are the crazy ones.
I could just as easily criticize and laugh at them for seeing things in my own way. The way I feel is everyone has the right to be who they are and live out their life accustomed to how they are as long as they do not impose their ways on me and try to make my life difficult on account of their indifference.
I never cared or tried to force my ways on anyone but others failed to treat me in the same. Some people have a problem with control and some cannot deal with what is foreign to what they know and have been taught.
Something unheard of or unorthodox can be disturbing to them.
I am resilient within my natural purpose.
There are times, places, and situations whereas we as people do not necessarily relate to or agree with things, but we may compromise or make allowances. This is vital in life as we must conform when it is contingent upon circumstances.
Of course, there must be order and harmony within living together to humanely survive here on the earth.
However, when it comes to personal identity, I will not budge for anyone.
If more people were allowed to truly be themselves and fresh ideas were contrived in dealing with problems or situations instead of the same predictable methods that I find tiring, annoying, and of no use or affect as one who these measures does not reflect upon accordance with.
This indeed is a sick society.
A lot of what is considered normal among many is what really is abnormal, but it is accepted because abnormal in relation to normal is what is normal to them.
I am so glad to not be normal.
I choose to be a healthy individual who is not a puppet of this world. –latoya lawrence
It feels so good to go out and to be in nature, to absorb and soak up energy from the sun.
Those irresistible days of lovely weather -feeling breeze, watching leaves as they sway on the trees.
Looking up at the sky, watching the birds fly.
Walking on the pavement heading to one’s destination.
Inhaling breaths of fresh air, catching various stretches of scenery here, there- and everywhere.
Intertwining in the natural twines of life in the fine.
There will always be negativity in some form in this world whether it be people or occurrence.
This is a challenge we all must face and are unable to escape.
Yet, as positive people who are celestially surrounded by, and who innately exude positive energy, there is no room for negativity to invade place within our space.
Negative energy cannot survive in an environment or atmosphere filled with positive vibration.
As we who live in our moments thankful for what we already have continue to enjoy the alignment with the universe as things run in concordance to the harmony within our own distinct balance of existence.
There may be other blessings looked forward to through other wants or desires.
While our needs are first priority- grateful in that they are constantly met through grace- there still may be inward hopes of a particular change in affairs, situation, or circumstance.
Sometimes adjustments can be made, or things are able to happen quickly.
In other instances what is hoped upon may come in due course.
Then there are simply periods when nothing seems to be happening in accordance- just a feeling of being stuck in a wait or a condition where feeling one will never get to what they would like to experience.
In hope, sometimes it may seem like there is no hope. Yet in the relentless steadfastness of the spirit within determination of the heart, mind, and soul- even in the face of standstill- we still may not budge.
I know there is a burning fire inside of me that refuses to give up as the flame inside that was lit no one can blow out. That fire will burn until all is consumed, leaving all scorched through a fervency that eventually incites an inevitable, ineluctable, release unto me that is irrevocable.
It is hard to remain still in any long stage of delay when one is eager or ready to get out and about to hop into the right now.
We do not too often appreciate interruption pause, or intermission. It interferes with our plans and/or causes an unwanted disturbance to our present.
Despite our discomfort and disappointment for being annoyingly or sadly inconvenienced by whatever it may bring, these reactions depending on the diversity of our nature, disposition, and matter of personal bearings.
God asks us to be still even though we do not always care to hear this request.
He has a message that comes along with it for all who can relate- I myself know this notification is true.
And that is- what he has done for us in the past as it had come to past, he will unhesitatingly undoubtedly do again for us to look back to once it goes to pass.
Most of us may not like to wait but in the wait, we gain “weight”. A weight that enables us to carry the heaviness of life without tumbling to crumble down.
Our weight builds up each time we wait as what we undergo through the wait bends and lifts us until we are flexible enough to withstand the treadmills of life that await us ahead.
Only then are we fully prepared to receive and properly handle what is given or bestowed to us in a timely fashion for us to whole-heartedly enjoy and accept great responsibility for.
God knows that we need to be equipped before he gives us the tools and resources to handle in carrying out anything he is entrusting to us.
So, we should listen carefully when he summons and keep up the training in the seasonal times of waiting because in the long run everything will pay off in ways incredibly unimaginable for those who are able to recognize. – latoya lawrence
I am getting such a pull to stay close to and remain with God.
Not that I could be separated from him anyhow, yet to keep attention and heart focused steadily on him.
To be aware of whatever is at hand, in general, but to not get distracted.
I appreciate how God keeps me alert, constantly cluing me on whenever I encounter anyone or anything unsuitable.
Innately able to fully take glimpses into the depths of persona and vibration.
I feel the energy of love reaching out to me along with positivity and light.
Feelings, emotion, intuition, or energy force is not a sole indicator of God’s love.
Whether we feel anything or not God is there regardless.
God’s care is never based on what we feel.
Nevertheless, the inner voice of spirit is speaking out, letting it be known that there is change, growth, and further spiritual advancement/development amongst and ahead.
When the spirit speaks, we are to discern and to listen to recognize what is being said, heard, described.
This is another turning point in my life, a moving on within the present, not holding onto- but to remember the past- to enhance what will be brought into the future.
I feel myself continuing to evolve through the energy connected to me flowing in accordance with the universe that I am in alignment with.
I literally feel God motioning me to come closer to him as I steadily experience acknowledging his ongoing presence in my life.
I understand how to trust more by relying on the essence around me teaching me to make a way out of life by living in the direction of the energy of the spirit that God has surrounded unto me.
I feel as if I am being led by the example of what he has shown to me in his works before. As if he is shadowing me to take deeper steps now into the current.
Instead of trusting, to not totally let go, because of not knowing what to expect in life’s unexpected possibilities that could one day be what I perceive as a liability (disadvantage)- God is taking my hand.
Knowing that I already know, even though, that certain life events are and are going to be out of our control- to just completely let go.
So, in other words, God is relaying to me to flow in along with the energy received unto me.
To go in, still not always knowing what will be. But that what will be in not knowing will be in my hope in the faith that only God sovereignly knows.
Trusting in his power, resting in his promises, and thriving in his grace- because God is determined for me to behold that everything will assuredly turn out to be more than okay.
Stay in my ways dear daughter LaToya, he translates whole-heartedly.
I signed into WordPress this morning to notice this Daily Prompt- which I have seen Prompts in general as a form of motivation from time to time pop up here- yet I had never responded. This is a great spur of the moment stimulating activity!
Today, when I saw the title to list one’s five favorite fruits I was inspired to do so as I am a vegan and definite lover of fruits!
My Top Five Favorite Fruits Are:
Fresh Pineapples🍍, Watermelon 🍉, Apples 🍏(Granny Smith/Red Delicious) 🍎, Oranges/Tangerines 🍊 and Grapes 🍇
Yesterday was my birthday. I turned 48. I generously received cards and unexpected gifts the day before from the small circle of those in my life who count.
I spent the afternoon honoring and paying tribute to my mother. Afterwards, I went out to eat and have dessert!
I had originally written a beautiful post in lovely detail about the wonderful experience of the day that I intended to publish.
However, when I went to copy my notes, they accidentally went to paste and my entire writings got deleted.
I was so pissed off.
Usually if this occasionally happens, I will end up rewriting an accurate version of events only to have my material turn out even better as if energy was enhancing what I write.
I knew what I had written and was going to post yesterday could not be replaced. It was so perfect in the way I expressed, giving respect to my mother on the day I was born and the fantastic interactions that went on during everything that took place.
So, the only thing I could gather was maybe this special moment was not meant to be publicly shared.
Some things are only meant to be kept private. And, I really knew beforehand that maybe this was not for the world’s eyes to view.
I had asked God beforehand should I share this because I do not normally have the desire to broadcast my happy- yet sacred things.
So, I gather it was the Lord’s way of giving me an answer. Those beautiful moments for and dedicated to mom that were also captured in photos that I shared with two close personal trustworthy lifelong friends (who also knew my mom) were meant to stay just between us.
Above and below are snapshots of the fresh flowers and balloons I purchased for my mother yesterday. I always buy her fresh white roses with additional sorted bouquets of flowers.
The roses smelled so clean, pure, and sweet.
Peace, love, purity, and respect always goes out to my mom.❤❤🕊🕊🕊❤❤
I purchased a brand-new smartphone last summer that I have not used yet. I never even opened its package.
I am still using my current phone that I have had for about three years, waiting until it finally conks out- hopefully it will last for a longer while before I have to let it go for good.
I will use my smartphone until the end.
I remember my Dell 1100 Windows XP desktop computer I first received as a gift was purchased for me in the year 2005. I had loved and used that computer for thirteen to fourteen years before the picture tube in the screen went out.
That Windows XP lasted me a long time.
Afterwards, I purchased a laptop. I was dealing with Verizon internet service back then and one of the benefits was that they replaced a computer for you under certain circumstances.
So, they had sent me a check for a certain amount of money where I headed to my local PC Richard’s and added to the rest of the funds.
I have always been this way since my teen years.
I would have brand new pairs of jeans and sneakers (LA Gear was my favorite footwear back at that time. I had four pairs all together. They were so cute and of good quality- all stylish in different colors I had) neatly tucked away in my closet and drawers. Jeans with their tags still on, sneakers still laying in their boxes unworn.
I was never one for show.
Just one to stock up on what I liked or needed to use for a later time if desired.
Material things never ruled me.
Last week was a good week for me. This week started off good as well- as I had expected it to.
I see how respected and appreciated I am at my workplace as I was recently rewarded for extended duty on behalf of the request of one whom I work with.
I do not mind helping good people who I feel comfortable with and who treat me right.
We are not always as fortunate to work in compatible environments with agreeable (in harmony with) people.
Whenever I work with the right type of people there is professionalism and mutual regard.
Unfortunately, we cannot always work in healthy environments or suitable ones that surround the wrong people, but that is life.
So, I consider it a blessing whenever I am lucky enough to work and interact with decent people.
I have no regrets in my life.
I am proud of the child that I once was, the teenager I used to be, and of the woman who I am now.
I am thankful and grateful for the divine guidance and protection that reigns over me.
God has never let or allowed negative people to win over me in any circumstance.
When I look into the past I remember that since I was a little girl all throughout my life whenever people had tried or partook in doing dirt against me they have always failed no matter how many things they did, lies they told, or delusion they upheld through their facades and false perception of projection they tried to reflect upon my life.
God has taught me, and from a young age, instilled in me during my journey- an insight, strength and confidence.
A living example of what he assembles no one can disassemble. It is also an inspiration to others of what is possible when others say what is not possible.
It upsets negative people when what would hurt or bother them does not hurt, bother, or affect you mentally or emotionally. They do not have the capacity or knowledge of higher consciousness within the spirit to know better. It is a level that they will never attain.
Whenever negative people went to strike their arrows, it was nothing to me. Idiocy can sometimes be annoying, but it is of no faze.
There are a lot of no-good people in the world. When God has a special purpose for us others can see that light, though, they might not discern what that light is. The devil comes for us the strongest, yet he has no power over us!
As I observe the present everything is running smoothly.
Of course, we all have the usual kinks that life throws at us here and there that eventually get untangled- but it is because of the fallen world that we live in and to keep us knowing that we can depend on God to see us through and to keep us thriving.
I love and appreciate the positive powerful energy around me.♥️
I know that everyone has different viewpoints, but as far as I am concerned, no one can destroy you unless you allow them to.
I could never imagine to give anyone the power to.
And no matter how hard others try, no one can block your blessings in life or what God has in store for you- and that is a fact!
I am not one to ponder or to worry about things unnecessarily.
I usually have faith in whatever situation knowing that I am divinely loved and solicitously watched over.
Even so, during times when I may expect the worst or think that things are headed for the worst God shows me the opposite only to bring out the best.
I do not like anything that diverts from my natural beauty.
I am not and have never been into or fond of fake hair, fake nails, false eyelashes, piercings, tattoos or make-up.
With me, what you see is what you get- a lady who is comfortable in her own skin without feeling the need or desire to change anything about herself.
I would never change myself to please anyone or to be accepted by anyone’s standards.
I am happy just the way I am. Truly loving, respecting, and believing in oneself is one of the most powerful things.
I have never considered myself a religious person even though some in my past have viewed me in that manner
I am spiritual.
Some people get the two mixed up when in relation to as they have their own differential aspects that may sometimes connect in similarity.
It seems like just another ongoing repetitive event that transpires year after year with the holidays. Most celebrations have lost the spark they used to have at igniting true festivity or merriment.
Everything has just been about experiencing the tradition instead of feeling any of the mood the holiday is supposed to bring.
I remember as a kid almost every Easter Sunday getting dressed up to go out in the town with family and friends.
However, Easter will always have the significance as a reminder of the resurrection of Jesus and what he did on the cross.
So that according to God’s nature and plan those who accept him could look forward to having everlasting peace, life, and love in his presence- even if for the reason why since the beginning of creation everything had to play out the way that it did- goes beyond our comprehension.
As writers we can get inspired by anything- I know I do.
It is a part of our artistic, creative mode when the energy stirs us into action.
Today I read a fellow blogger’s “About Page” after I discovered her by a comment of mine that she liked.
I loved what she had to say in her introduction.
These are the sentences of the lady’s words that struck me because I have also been saying this for years.
We see the world with our eyes which have our own perception. When view doesn’t please our perception we start taking it as wrong or consider it as misfit for our calculated vision.
I responded back to her summary and shared my own accord in agreement by denoting:
Love your words that are spoken in truth.
As soon as some see or hear something that goes beyond their sense of understanding or belief, they are ready to attack or criticize instead of just accepting that we all are different and on our own path and there is so much more out there within the universe than what they may be able to grasp.
Our minds are a place where we store and collect. Where we deliberate and rationalize.
It is also a place where impressions materialize.
Reminders of events depicted within visionary, auditory or conceptual representation.
Our reflection of memories.
Indelibly painted imprints and images embedded in the brain.
Somethings are forgotten. Some things are remembered as clearly as day.
Sometimes what was totally forgotten can be triggered by something to be recalled again in an instant.
Some memories of things or events become cloudy or totally forgotten to never emerge from the fog of forgetfulness.
Memories that reflect to us are a great benefit bestowed to us upon nature. A blessing to our well-being.
Good, bad, and neutral memories serve to assist within our review, study, attest, and mirror of what we experience and consciously, unconsciously, or subconsciously absorb. –latoya lawrence
I remember in my teenage years and in my early adulthood how I viewed life as nothing.
To me, it still is nothing but at the same time it is something meaningful that means nothing.
I spend and have spent days/years just killing time as I never cared about this world, yet I have had to always keep going on account of a God that has me here for purposes of his own that I do not delight in at all.
Yes, I have no problem coping with or managing this life as my life has shown and proved that I can handle anything. The problem is this life in the present world is unnatural to a natural way that life should be.
A lot of what is deemed normal is not normal.
Why did this plan have to include me? With all the people God created why drag me into this ridiculous shit that has nothing to do with me?
I have been blessed but these certain anointings have never been enough to make living here in the world with all the dumb shit and shit I could care less about worth my while.
I was always ahead of my time and pissed off because God put me here- feeling that I did not belong here and deserved better.
God claims to love but what kind of love would bring me to a place that I despise?
He gave me and gave certain others knowledge but what is the purpose of knowing things when we have no real control over anything and no guarantees in life but to one day die?
Are we just to know that no matter what we have experienced and possess through seasons of happiness and hardships we are still just mere dust that can be blown away at any time?
When I look back at a lot of life that has passed by, I really do not see the point or the purpose in the things I have gone through or encountered.
Most of the things I know now I already knew back when I was much younger.
Many things that excite and that are looked upon as significant to others are not appealing or anything relevant to me.
I did not need to witness or observe accounts of what I considered to be sick shit among other people -or to be successfully delivered through undesirable trials and tribulations- to know or to understand God’s power as I have.
To me, God’s force was always evident. But I was made to be an individual put into a world just like everyone else to undergo inevitable life situations.
What is the point of being in the world if one is truly not of it even if they are born into imperfection?
My resentment in the past for God came from my perceived view of his character and I still hold a little resentment toward him as I do not appreciate things about him that I do not understand as to his reasons why he lets things in life be.
Nevertheless, it is what it is.
I have been tired of this fucked up world since my teenage years yet still strong enough to endure every moment of it.
I speak the truth. It is true that the truth will set one free. All one must do is Boldy speak it.
It does not matter if one believes or not, just if one knows their own truth and lets it be known.
I have never been known as a liar. I have always had strong credibility among those who count.
My mother taught me as a young child and told me- if you tell me the truth, I can always help you.
Wise words spoken by an exceptional mother.
Why lie to the person on earth who loves you the most and who would fight to the ends of the earth in your honor and defense?
I am amazed at the power released into the universe by having the courage and spunk to speak the truth with such ease and eagerness.
It comes as second nature to me.
Truth is a powerful, wonderful, and dangerous weapon against any lie or falsehood.
While I got a ride from work today by an associate of mine, she brought up today being International Women’s Day.
She mentioned how we need more women leadership and women in power.
And how we need to get these crazy men out of office.
I totally agreed with her, and I added that the time for this change is far overdue.
She acknowledged how we have a few wacky women in congress and other places that need to go too.
However, for the most part things would be better if more women ran the show.
In a world where impressions matter to many, truths are what truly mattered to me.
Not projecting a facade of what is acceptable for the sake of being accepted.
I found it impossible for me to put on a disguise as I am not one to be a people pleaser.
There is a time for courtesy, professionalism, diplomacy, and respecting certain boundaries as well as a time when to justifiably cross them.
It is so important to live out one’s truth even if that genuineness and loyalty to self within self-preservation according to one’s own distinct nature causes a reproach within others due to what goes beyond their own comprehension and/or level of discernment.
I have been lied upon, misunderstood, judged for things I have never done, criticized for not being able to be controlled by others, and I have been the object of other people’s vicious gossip, envy and jealousy just like many other people of substance in life have.
All other people’s negativity did was cause me to become further resilient and despise and look down upon these individuals more than I already had beforehand.
As one who is extremely stubborn no one can make me do anything I do not want to do, and no one can stop me from doing anything that I want to do.
I have noticed an innate force within me that refused to allow me to be deterred from possessing the essential liberty that is instilled within me to express and prevail.
I was naturally inspired to continue to move forward unaffected.
Permitting others, the opportunity to dictate or restrict one’s path and future out of fear/intimidation or discouragement only prevents one’s celestial discovery, steady growth, and ultimate evolution.
The home decor style of the 60’s and 70’s were not just for hippies and gypsy fortune tellers.
Whether one called them door beads or beaded curtains- bead adornments that decorated the entrances of doorway rooms in the home and within establishments offered a cozy and enchanting ambience to settings that a lot of individuals could appreciate.
I remember as a young child during the late seventies and early eighties, walking through the clear-colored beads that hung from my home, clasping them open, loving the sounds they made while they hit up against one another.
People had many a variety of these beaded curtains.
Some of the people in my neighborhood (next door, across the street, down the block, and blocks away neighbors) had the attractive wooden kind.
Some had bright multicolored ones, and some had ones that were designed in diamond/oval shapes.
Door beads/beaded curtains are a creative way to add character and beauty into a place of residence or business.
The thought also brings to me a wonderful sense of nostalgia to what once was.
There are modern door beads and beaded curtains to decorate our homes with nowadays, but nothing will compare to the essence that held at a time when this style expressed the decade.
I love being with you. You make me happy. I have so much fun with you.
You make me laugh with your cute little antics.
You melt my heart each time you look into my eyes. You are so sincere.
I love your wet kisses. I love the way you cuddle in bed beside me.
The first time I saw you I knew we were meant to be together.
Our bond is forever.
This is more than animal attraction- and not just a feeling of puppy love.
You stole my heart; nothing will ever tear us apart.
You are my babe- it is surely agreed- even though you are not of the human breed.
Happy Valentines Day my sweet furball of fire!
A sweet smooch goes out to my favorite pooch.
I was told twice yesterday by a mature (ninety-five year old) woman of experience that because of the way I look physically, and the way that I carry myself, I should be in movies.
This is not the first time I have been told these words and similar ones alike.
As a teen and young adult, some people would ask me if I was a model and would tell me that I could be one.
Another person told me they saw me as a movie actress type who was supposed to be writing screenplays.
Aside from other things, I could have been a lawyer or a psychologist if I had really wanted and chose to. I have both the smarts and the mindset.
The fact is, I never wanted a life in Hollywood to be broadcast on television, or to be photographed for magazines walking down the runway.
I never had the desire to be a legal representative or mental health specialist either.
Though many of us are qualified or can do or become professionals in more than one area, it does not mean this is a preferred career or path to seek.
Jobs and job labels do not define us as individuals.
Even though there are narrow-minded misinformed people who believe the higher the title or higher the income, the higher the stature.
Someone who does not have a job or who has a job that is considered low rank in comparison to high-level/high-profile jobs can have far more integrity, intelligence, ability than the one touting their so-called credentials.
They may have just not gotten the right opportunity, could have fallen into hard times, did not believe enough within themselves or did not have any support.
There are several reasons and factors for why those who could achieve great heights do not.
A lot of people who are in positions of power or who hold positions that are praised within society are not as adequate as they think they are or would like to believe.
Many of them are nothing but shit! They are as common as they come- there is nothing special about their existence.
Novel within character and mindset unlike the ordinary are what define true standing within its authenticity.