Category Archives: God

Literal Food For Thought

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As a highly spiritual and intellectual human being with an unconventional nature and mind that from a very young age would analyze and indulge in heavy conversation with other individuals on the same or similar wavelength that didn’t come around too often who I could talk to, exchange ideas with, and challenge on a many of important or controversial subjects I always had a mind of my own, able to think for myself without ever agreeing to accept or to go along with something just because it had constantly been stated or written as an example of authority or fact and so forth.

I use to speak with adults who’d never thought or heard of the things that I would ask or speak of so it was refreshing to run across others with brains that were able to grow and that expanded to the places that only we could go as explorers and discoverers within our own thought process and personalities.

I’ve always instinctively observed, read and inspected a lot of literature that could hold my attention, interacted with different types of people and have experienced a great deal within my lifetime.

And while I usually do not routinely visit blogs in general here and there or every now and then I may come across a title while I am on my computer that catches my attention and that is what happened today and rarely do I re-post another person’s article unless I can relate to it and there is really some significance to it that needs to be said and deliberated upon as it speaks much truth and thought provoking matter and that has only happened twice so far out of all of my years of blogging with Vedic Wisdom’s “Symptoms Of Voodoo Black Magic” and Order Of the Way’s “What Is A Caul?” that is no longer on my blog . I stumbled upon in my opinion a wonderful post that I am going to share and here it is:

Blowing the Whistle, Chpt. 5: Tracking the Crack in the Universe (Loosh 101)

This is the fifth chapter in an online book, “Blowing the Whistle on Enlightenment: Confessions of a New Age Heretic,” by Bronte Baxter.

Did you ever wonder why a good God would build a world where the only way to survive is by taking life? How long would you stay alive if you refused to eat? You may love animals and grow plants inside your home and flowers in your garden, but every time you eat, you destroy the life of something. A something with a consciousness, that feels and desires to live, as we do.

The other day I grabbed an onion from a basket to chop up, and I saw it had sprouted a beautiful, tender, light-green shoot. It had a life inside it, a consciousness that wanted to take root, breathe air and thrive. Any tears in chopping that onion did not come from the fumes.

I’m not a sentimentalist. I’m a person questioning, increasingly aware of an insidious thread woven through biological life. We are born, we feed, and we die. Life is a process of consuming other living things in order to stay alive as long as possible until death in turn consumes us. We tell ourselves life is a whole lot more, but it’s reduced to that as long as we must feed to survive. If we can’t stay alive more than a few months without food, how can eating not be fundamental to how we define our existence?

Eating is a requirement for biological life as we know it. It’s the thread that holds together material existence. More than a thread, it’s a chain, binding us to the law that we must consume each other. Rebelling is punishable by death.

What kind of God or gods would create a world predicated on killing? We don’t like to ask that, and we find every excuse to avoid looking at this question. But every time a dear one dies, or you find a nibbled bird in the yard destroyed by an idle cat, or you read about an animal that has suffered mercilessly, or another molested child, or a nation ravaged by a quake that’s buried thousands of living people, your mind goes back to that nagging question. Who would make a world like this? Was it truly a God of love?

According to much evidence, it wasn’t. The world was created by something else. Or if it was created by the loving God our hearts insist exists, then creation has been tampered with by someone else so merciless that it barely resembles the original divine vision. The biological universe is controlled by the law that to live we must take life or die. That is sinister. Something there is that makes us have to eat, that makes us age and disintegrate. This is the “something wrong with the world,” the crack in the universe. Knowledge of it works “like a splinter in the mind, driving you mad,” quoting “The Matrix.” Yet awakening to the truth of our predicament is the first step toward radical change. Only radical change can possibly right the fundamental flaw woven into physical creation.

And how well-woven it is. Not only does violence wind through the lives of all Earth life like the fibers of a time-bomb attached to a victim. It reaches out into space, where supernovas implode, collapsing millions of stars along with all living beings on all their attendant planets. Death and devouring are so pervasive most people can’t conceive of a world without them, or if they can conceive it, they label the concept preposterous. Yet quantum physics shows that matter is nothing but atoms: emptiness vibrating. Emptiness does not die and neither does the energy it oscillates. So why must bodies die that are made of up of these things?

Robert Monroe, in his book “Far Journeys,” writes of contact he had with a light being in an out-of-body experience. (Monroe is arguably the world’s foremost researcher on OBEs; he started an institute with trainee/researchers to scientifically investigate the phenomenon.) Reportedly the light being told Monroe that when humans die, their energy is released and harvested by trans-dimensional beings, who use it to extend their own life spans. The claim is that the universe is a garden created by these beings as their food source.

According to Monroe’s story, animals are intentionally positioned on this planet to feed on plants and on each other, thereby releasing the life force of their victims so it can be harvested. In a predator-prey struggle, exceptional energy is produced in the combatants. The spilling of blood in a fight-to-the-death conflict releases this intense energy, which the light beings call “loosh.” Loosh is also harvested from the loneliness of animals and humans, as well as from the emotions engendered when a parent is forced to defend the life of its young. Another source of loosh is humans’ worship.

According to Monroe’s informant, our creators, the cosmic “energy farmers,” intentionally equipped animals with devices like fangs, claws and super-speed in order to prolong predator-prey combat and thereby produce more loosh. In other words, the greater the suffering, the more life force is spewed from our bodies, and the tastier the energy meal for our creators.

This story told to Monroe (which threw him into a two-week depression) corresponds to reports in some of the world’s oldest scriptures, the Vedas, Upanishads, and Puranas of India. There we read that “the universe is upheld by sacrifice” (Atharva Veda) and that“all who are living (in this world) are the sacrificers. There is none living who does not perform yagya (sacrifice). This body is (created) for sacrifice, and arises out of sacrifice and changes according to sacrifice.” (Garbha Upanishad)

Again:

“(Death as the Creator) resolved to devour all that he had created; for he eats all. . . He is the eater of the whole universe; this whole universe is his food.” (Mahabharata)

In the writings of Carlos Castaneda, who chronicles the life and teachings of a Yaquii sorcerer called Don Juan, we find another story of the Divine devouring humans, in this case human consciousness. Reports Castaneda:

“The Eagle is devouring the awareness of all the creatures that, alive on earth a moment before and now dead, have floated to the Eagle’s beak, like a ceaseless swarm of fireflies, to meet their owner, their reason for having had life. The Eagle disentangles these tiny flames, lays them flat, as a tanner stretches out a hide, and then consumes them; for awareness is the Eagle’s food. The Eagle, that power that governs the destinies of all living things, reflects equally and at once all those living things.” (“The Eagle’s Gift,” by Carlos Castaneda)

The idea that man must sacrifice (must kill something or be killed in order to appease the gods) is apparently intrinsic to all the world’s root religions. We find blood ritual, including human sacrifice, in the Druidic tradition, Tibetan Buddhism, among the Indians of the Americas, in Greece and Rome, Africa, China, Arabia, Germany,Phoenicia and Egypt. Even the Old Testament (Judges 11:31-40) has a little-advertised story of human sacrifice, with the Israelite judge Jephthah ritually slaughtering his own daughter to fulfill a vow he made to Jehovah.

While we may not think of Judaism as typically promoting human sacrifice, it more than promoted it if we count the genocide Jehovah demanded of the Hebrews. In one day alone, they murdered 12,000 Canaanites “and utterly destroyed everything in the city, both man and woman, young and old, and ox and sheep and donkey with the edge of the sword.”(Joshua: 6:21)

In Islam, the situation is similar. Allah, while paying lip service to the immorality of human sacrifice, orders his servants in the Koran to practice jihad against all unbelievers. “When the forbidden months are past, then fight and slay the Pagans wherever ye find them, and seize them, beleaguer them, and lie in wait for them in every stratagem of war.” (Koran: 9:5)

Peace-loving Moslems interpret such passages as “symbolic” in their desire to justify their faith, much as Christians try to justify Jehovah’s sociopathic behavior with excuses. In many ways, the god of Islam reasons and rants like the god of the Israelites. Could it be the same entity? It isn’t contradictory that he would support two separate peoples, then lead them to fight each other. Not if his agenda is to stimulate and harvest plenty of loosh.

Christianity, the religion of brotherly love, is implicated in blood sacrifice by being rooted in the Jewish tradition. The Bible declares Jesus is the son of God (Jehovah), and Jehovah announces at Jesus’ baptism, “This is My beloved Son in whom I am well-pleased.” (Matthew: 17:5) Where was Jesus when his father was slaughtering the Canaanites? Jesus himself becomes a blood sacrifice, a fact that Catholics reenact in the mass and that Protestants bathe themselves in to be “saved.” Christians are no strangers to sacrifice.

If suffering and death were part of creation that no one, including the gods, could help, there’d be some reason to be more forgiving. I might even buy the story that they need us to support them with our homage and we need them to keep the universe running. But when you add blood sacrifice into the equation, I abandon ship. It’s one thing if the gods can’t prevent earthly suffering and death – quite another if they seek it out and thrive from it – or worse yet, created it. And that’s what blood sacrifice, and the scriptures around it, indicate.

When the oldest scriptures of the world tell us we were created as food for the gods, I have to ask myself if I want to live in a universe where that might be true. The fact is, I don’t. I can no longer give my approval to that kind of reality. So if I won’t live with it, I have to come up with something better. I have to find something more fundamental than the physical universe to locate my identity in, and my power in. I sense, as many do these days, that there’s something beyond the universe as it has been presented to us, something outside this box, outside this system. That’s what I seek to know, connect with, and draw from.

Robert Morning Sky, a truth seeker of the Hopi and Apache traditions, tells a story he learned from his people about a race of beings who knew no limitations, who existed far outside this physical universe. One day one of them declared his intention to visit Earth and take on a body just for the adventure of it, for the experience. His friends cautioned him, as this universe had a reputation as amnesia-producing, a place of no return. But the entity laughed that off and promised to come back after one lifetime.

Centuries passed, and the entity never came home. One of his comrades decided to enter the physical world to go look for his friend. He promised not to get lost in matter and to return with the other individual. More centuries passed, and neither being returned. So another immortal entered physical mass, and he also never came back. In time many members of these unlimited beings incarnated in human form, and the story goes, none of them yet has gone home.

Maybe we are those people, starting to remember who we are. Maybe it’s time to break out of the hypnosis we’ve lived under for eons, the unquestioned assumptions that we must kill and eat, suffer and die, live in lack and sadness, and undergo all the human drama as it has been defined for us.

Is it insane to think that humans can beat the system? That we could make a choice to stop the activities that supply our up-line with fuel? That we could minimize – even stop– our own refueling from the life force of creatures lower than us on the food chain? Is it madness to think that our bodies, made of undying energy, could themselves not have to die, that we might learn to live on the power of infinite consciousness, which we can access within ourselves, being part of it?

While some may call that madness, I prefer it to the world I see around me. I certainly prefer it to death. I prefer it to loss of my dear ones, and to sickness and poverty. The greatest experiment mankind can engage in is mastery of the principles of freedom, creation, abundance, and immortality. We’re wearing body suits that in 70-some years of use are programmed to self-destruct. What could be more important than changing that programming?

In the Bhagavad Gita, Lord Krishna warns: “He who does not follow the wheel thus set revolving lives in vain.” The wheel is the cycle of birth and death, karma and retribution, human sacrifice and divine blessing. To rebel against this system is to fail in our life purpose as defined by those who say they are our creators and gods. But surely life was meant to be more than dinner for the next rung up on the food chain. If “living in vain” means breaking out of that, I’m all for that kind of failure.

Bronte Baxter

© Bronte Baxter 2008

I found this article at:(https://brontebaxter.wordpress.com/loosh-101-tracking-the-crack-in-the-universe/)

 

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Significance Of The Caul/A Caulbearer That Cannot Be Defeated

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1397581_front_porchThe Trials And Truths Of A Caulbearer

My Love And Light

I came across some old comments that I had saved but never approved because they were so ridiculously transparent.

Full of envies, jealousies, and disappointments as to my success as a “special person” and as to the successes within my life as a “survivor”. As a great accomplished (continuing to push forward and prevail regardless of obstacles set before me by enemies) individual with strength, confidence, growth, and much knowledge.

This person in particular who addressed me rather arrogantly and bitterly in a comment was particularly responding to the one and only post regarding the Caul that I had copied and pasted to share for public observance August 26, 2007 http://www.caulbearer.org Order Of The Ancient Way which was removed by wordpress since the owners of the site did not approve of the sharing of their content.

Anyway, this person specifically who I speak of had not read anything else other than this particular post that I had copied regarding being born with the caul.

They had not bothered to read any of the over one hundred prior posts that I had written concerning my life and experiences with the world distinctly and in general.

So when they mentioned that much of what I wrote about caulbearers they had seen on other sites-it was indeed a big fat lie! I did not write the post listed by “Order Of The Ancient”. Nothing but a game that they tried to run on me.

Later came Shannon Lee wolf (Sharon Lassiter) who tried the same thing and failed (But she went a step further by falsely accusing me of plagiarism. And only to draw attention primarily toward herself). The only problem now is that she continues to come to my site to steal my content, facts, experiences, and style of writing (which cannot be duplicated) to put into her own words and to claim as her very own material just like she did with the other particular members of her phony caulbearers united website.

All credit for anything that Shannon writes goes to I and to all the other “true caulbearers” that she has stolen input from. I guarantee that she will not get far. Everyone who is on the level knows the truth about her. Even the certain people around her are aware of her fraudulent schemes-trust me!

This person accused me of purposely attempting to drum up admiration. In reality this person was just infuriated by the attention that I was getting on my site. Jealous, resentful people do not like to see others who are talented do well in the things that they were meant to do.

I am a writer, a messenger, a speaker of truth.

If people are inspired to compliment me or to look up to me that is purely their prerogative. I have absolutely nothing to do with that. If a bunch of people were coming to my blog constantly criticizing me would I have been accused of trying to purposely drum up that type of attention? I think not, so please spare me the bullshit.

People have admired me and my works all through out my life and for many reasons just like many of us congratulate or compliment others who we take pleasure or resource in.

Whether one “praises” or “ridicules” it has no bearing on me.

I am not here to please or to disturb anyone. I am here because I have just as much right as anyone else to live my life and to fulfill out my purpose.

I am not obligated to serve anybody’s “God of the bible”. He is not my Lord or my commander.

My caul birth serves for my own well being as an individual of my own existence of where I come from, who I am, and where I belong.

And no one will ever violate that. No one will ever dictate to me what my life and birth truly signifies within the terms of lifestyle or celestial means.

My worth is not based on the service from me to others.

I am not here to serve anyone. I have no obligation but to myself. I am obligated to love myself, to respect myself, and to be all that I was created to be.

I am one of the very few of my kind who weren’t able to be converted or destroyed by the demonic and their negative disguises and influences. Part of my purpose is for the survival of what I am a representation of.

And through my self service of naturally exercising and utilizing my gifts to enhance my life and profession certain others are able to benefit within certain areas if they choose to, or if they find it useful to their own state of being.

The so called “will” of “God” does not apply to me as I gratefully and fortunately am not of him.

“God” is demonic. I know this for a fact. There are a lot of lies and brainwashes going on out within the world that only a person like me is able to see, feel, hear, know, interpret, and understand. Certain revelations are not meant for just anyone.

All caulbearers are not of one another. They all do not use their knowledge or ability in the same exact method. All do not even have the same beliefs or interests into the occult. Many have different roads, genealogical roots, and are connected to specific spiritual dimensions. And many are very powerful in their abilities and in what they do.

Some caulbearers are just extraordinary people living ordinary lives. And if they follow or believe in “God” it does not necessarily make them bad people. Neither does it make those born without cauls any less good or important in their existence.

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Of course, those who oppose the God of the bible will come under ignorant conclusions and judgements by many. It does not bother or affect me at all. It just makes me the more proud and determined.

This person who left the comment also mentioned obeying “Gods’ instruction to stay on the right path.

It is very sad that some choose and need a sad book like the bible in order to know the true difference between what is right and what is genuinely wrong according to their particular nature.

God is just a sick, irresponsible, cowardly spirit who continually wants and needs to be praised and worshipped for his own gratification or self satisfaction.

If one is truly pure in mind and spirit according to their own particular nature guidance, direction, inspiration and truth will innately manifest and lead one down along their correct or destined path. I know. This has been my way for all of my life because of who I genuinely belong to, and I have lived an extremely good life.

That is why I have always constantly come under attack ever since childhood.

Christianity and no other religion will ever strip away the true identity or spirituality that comes from my true African origin.

“Spirit has always been with me”. “Spirit came to me on it’s own”. My ancestors and Orishas have been with me from the beginning and they will continue to be with me til the end. I am gratefully of them.

I don’t give a fuck about the “god” of the bible and I am tired of hearing about him. He gets no credit from me just pure contempt.

My life runs so happily, so peacefully, and so smoothly. Only when he’s around and trying to intercede with his demonic presence and demonic believers, servants, or followers does conflict arise.

I remember when my so called Godmother (who my mother picked out for me during my christening as a baby in a catholic church. And who I have no regard for. She was a dopefiend in the past as well as one who was down with the rest of my enemies).

Lorraine had the nerve to tell me that I defeated all of my enemies with black magic because I always kept the ways of God.

Lorraine’s statement was one of the biggest insults to me (I had never told her or went into detail about how I defeated my enemies. “They are all shocked and surprised, they don’t understand how you did it” Lorraine had said to me at that particular time).

They believed more in their own God more than they should have!-I say.

I know tricks that none of them knew about. Not even the certain person that I worked with. I did the rest alone. And within the present I still work alone with my “spiritual connection”.

I, Latoya, having lived a clean life had absolutely nothing to do with me adhering to the laws or rules of God. I defeated my enemies because I and what is around me is much more stronger and much more powerful than them and what they are.

And God played a big part in my enemies black magic as they were and are all demonic.

Some people have such a twisted and misguided view of the influence of their perceived God, actually believing that we as humans cannot be of any good or of any significant value without him. Nothing but pure bullshit!

I am the way that I am not because of the God of the bible. If I was I’d be in serious trouble!

I am the way that I am because it is within my own nature. Strong, honest, and free with no shame or apologies.

The circumstances around my very existence estimates the true value of my worth and I have plenty of experiences to validate every aspect. So the only one’s that defy and fool themselves are the ones who are in denial and who are blinded by their own ignorance and lack of acuity.

Here is the comment that was sent to me on my blog back in the year of 2008

From Caul/Veil, 2008/05/28 at 2:19 PM
2008/05/28 Approve | Unapprove | Spam | Delete
Caulbearer
cs70@cox.net | 68.9.80.253

Furthermore?LaToya, you should question yourself and your inner motives. I see a lot of people praising you here, but you would do much better to help others see what they need to know for themselves. Praise will be a downfall

As a caulbearer, you have a gift of ability and certain attributes that others do not. But you should take care of those. God?s instruction to you through the Bible still applies, and you are not exempt from being contaminated by self agrandizement of free will. The Caul itself is not an ends to a means. It is a means to do good. How you choose to use your abilities is what makes those profitable -spiritually profitable- to others, and should be done without acknowledgement of your self.
You can fool yourself. You can deify yourself. I know. And you have to take great care in listening to God, to know that you are staying on the right path.
Much of what you write about Caulbearers I have seen on other sites. But I don?t need to see that to know that I am different, that somehow I know more, that somehow I can sometimes heal. Just remember, you need God to do all of these things, with the caul or without.

And here is the other comment that was more recent from last year. This one however, was motivated by the connection that had to do with a post regarding Shannon Lee Wolf. If one takes notice though they both are similarly related just different tactics “Just like the rest who’s names I will not mention”. They all had and have their different approaches yet some go away and leave it alone while others continue to effort in vain:

LoveGOD
Himroid@rocketmail.com
76.91.63.248
Submitted on 2012/10/02 at 2:30 am

For a hand- pickedt soldier of GOD you sure don’t mention him much . I do recall you talking alot about you’r self though. Seems like you need to take a few steps back and humble you’re self. You seem so full of light and so full of shit at the same time . My name is what you call me. I was born to anwser his call as well. You spend a lot of time on the computer I see . The world needs you. If you have gifts I can promise they were not ment for you to gain “fans” . Instead of promoting “you” or other negetive light why not ask that people go sign up to donate Blood Marrow . Or ask that people in need of someone to talk to e-mail you . You get my point of course . See you’ll probably want to fire back at some grammer error or get ignorant in some way but the truth is GOD . Email all retarded comments to HIM and ill take the positive ones 😉 Also what point is it to have us unite ? That just means a higher chance of some one feeling there self a little to much ( happens some times ) and trying to be some leader or something like that. Our gifts don’t need anyone but …. take a guess …Yep ..!! GOD!! ..

Both comments from demonic creatures who I laugh at without pity. They do not realize what they show. I know what they are, the people who they are affiliated with and so on. Most of the time they are looking for a response, a reaction to aid them out within the mission that they have planned (all in which I can see right on through). For so many of them they sure aren’t too bright-but after all that is why there is so many of them! The blind leading the blind.

The Visions/The Messages/The Knowledge

I Am Blessed So Keep Your God To Yourself

 

My Love And Light

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A lot of people hold back on things on account of the fears that they may have. Fear of what people would think, fear of being misjudged, fear of criticism, fear of ridicule, fear of rejection, fear of controversy and so on.

And some just keep quiet because they feel that some things are just better left unsaid.

There are always going to be those who misinterpret, perceive ignorant notions, and continue to make wrong accusations against what they disagree with or against what they do not comprehend/understand.

In some of my posts I have mentioned “my love and light”. And I just bet that there were some who thought that I was referring to “god” the god of the bible (Jehovah, Yahweh or whatever you want to call him) but however I was not.

God is definitely not my love and light. And I have never ever claimed to be any soldier of his army.

Yes I indeed was born with the gift of second-sight. I am extremely sensitive. I have a power within me to write that is led by spirit and many other special spiritual abilities, yet that does not make me a person who walks with god.

In true fact, I genuinely hate god. I hate him with everything that is within me and I am very proud of that. As far as I am concerned god is a very sick, evil, demented and demonic spirit force that many are blinded by.

Whoever deals with me will get the straight up truth about how I feel and what I am about. I do not hide behind lies out of fear. It makes me feel good to be able to speak the truth, it sometimes even screams to come out because it needs to be heard and acknowledged.

Am I a bad person since I detest god so much, absolutely not. It is the exact opposite! When I was a little girl I often wondered where did god come from. Who created him and how did he come into existence. And what makes him the ultimate authority figure?

I’ve read the bible, what was so drastically wrong with eve eating an apple- the forbidden fruit-from the tree of knowledge. What was wrong with her eyes being opened to awareness/knowledge/perception?

So what, she disobeyed god. What were his motives for wanting her to stay ignorant? Control I say. Just like the way of the world still is today. Then threatening and punishment for not listening to the bullshit instructions on a life that may not be befitting to all even if it is just in concern for the very minority.

I’ve noticed that a lot of people who claim to be deeply or overly religious have a lot of skeletons in their closets. Sometimes they’ll hit rock bottom, get scared, then they run to “god” and hide behind the church in an attempt to gain “redemption”.

It even seems that god shows a favoritism toward these kinds. I can understand that though because I have absolute favoritism for what is of my kind/class/nature too.

Some of these people make me sick with their false sense of justification! They will come across a person who never did any of the dirt that they have done then have the nerve and audacity to make them appear like they are the ones who are the worse thing in the world. That is a result of sickness mixed in with guilt and jealousy over the other person’s character.

What made them turn into the person that they were in the first place? Oh, “sin” of course.

Well, I never truly trusted in god and I do not agree with his scriptures. And I never messed up my life in any way. Just look at how the world is so sex crazed. “Be fruitful and multiply”, god said. “A woman and a man become one flesh after sexual intercourse/marriage” supposedly-whatever.

I honestly think that the sexual union between a man and a woman is one of the most ugliest and sickest things that are in existence and I never did and-do not want any part of it.

I don’t care what the rest of the world does but god’s plans do not apply to me.

As a teenager and as an adult I was never sexually active. A lot of people just assumed I had high morals or that it had to do with my religious beliefs. None of that was true. Yes, I’ve always highly respected myself, however, that was indeed not the reason that I did not want to have sex.

Number one, I was never attracted to men. The penis is a very big turn off in every way to me. Number two, I love my body and the thought of a man’s penis banging up against my precious insides then spurting out his nasty body fluids to mix in with mine was another complete turn off.

The only beautiful thing that I read in the bible was about marry conceiving a child without the aid of a man. And I deeply wish that could have been the normal way of life for reproduction purposes.

The very first time I ever indulged in the sexual act was at the age of twenty-four, and the last time was at the age of twenty four! It was a one time and never again thing.

I never would have done it to begin with if I had the money to go to a sperm bank at the time. I wanted to conceive a child and it didn’t work out and it was all for the best. I don’t really want a child by somebody that I would have to go to bed with. Especially someone I did not desire in any way, form or fashion.

If I was to conceive a child it will be done because I truly want her and not out of any unnatural sexual lust or desire.

I was proud of myself for not having no sexual attachment, no sexual feeling, and no emotion when I did the act. I did not feel any pleasure nor any pain. I did not feel anything mentally or physically.

And I had absolutely no respect for the guy I was with. It was a ridiculous act, one that made no sense. And it really made me wonder what was wrong with the rest of the world and god. Sex is not sacred to me, sex is sick!

I’ve been through numerous deep “spiritual experiences” since childhood. I’ve had evil witchcraft spirits removed/extracted from my body. I’ve had spirits go through me-come in/leave out. And god himself was the demonic force behind the “brujeria” that I went through in the past-and the brujeria that has tried to be sent back to me during a many failed attempts.

I know this for a fact. I saw it through my own eyes. I bet there are many who don’t know that and many who would not believe it because they think god is so good. But I know, I experienced it, and I know who Satan “really” is. And I am glad to know the truth. No one has a clue of the things/realities that I feel, hear, know, and see.

A lot of people believe that “god” has the strongest power. I do not because if he did he would have been able to destroy me a long time ago through his evil followers. I told this neighbor of mine years ago that I felt that god was sick. And she got highly excited and upset with me.

“God is not sick”, she said raising her voice. “Don’t you know that god can suck the life out of you?!”

“So why hasn’t he?” I said to myself.

Some time after our disagreement this woman developed medical problems and was put on oxygen. She got one of her legs cut off from gangrene that was associated with diabetes, caught dementia and then eventually died. So who got the life sucked out of whom?

It may sound harsh but she talked that shit to me just for expressing what I felt and look what happened to her. I don’t go around knocking anyone or telling them what will happen to them just because they do not agree with what I do or do not believe in.

Some people seriously need to check themselves. It is one thing to have a belief/opinion and another to try to force something onto someone. It just doesn’t work that way. There definitely is a powerful force/forces other than “god”. And that is fact.

What the bible considers or/and refers to as devil worship is my “love and light”. Now of course, I know better-that it is not actually the true worship of demons even though demons do disguise themselves in many different forms and fashions. And I could just as easily say that most are being deceived by god as god to me is what Satan is to the Christians.

There is so much that I could express, debate with, and so on, however there is so much that I am able to put in a post.

For the most part though, I am surrounded by peace, happiness, and truth. I feel free, secure, and strong. I am my self, my true self, all of the things that my love and light allows me to be.

My love and light gives me pleasure. God always made me feel miserable. My love and light wants me to be who I am. God wants me to be who he wants me to be-someone who is not my self.

God has continuously tried to fight for my identity to overtake my spirit and it is a battle that he will never win. That crap about giving us all free will is a lie. I know for me as a spiritual person with strong sensitivities and wisdom that he wants me to yield and lean towards his own structural program.

I never loved god. I do not like his style. I do not like his certain creations. I’d rather not have life than to live under any influences of his. My mind is something that he will never get inside of to brainwash and control.

Every thing that I feel is completely of my own. No one has ever been able to coerce me and no one has put anything into my head. I came to know what I know naturally and honestly and I am absolutely proud. I am a grown woman!

I love my ancestors and orishas-my spiritual connections/the universe-and all of my positive spiritual energies. I am a very good person who has lead a very good life. A good life that “god” cannot take any credit for!

I have gone through so much in this life on account of sick negativity and negative people and I was still the one to come out untouched and unaffected. And I owe that all to my strong spirit along with my “loves and lights” that have always shined upon me with the most ultimate of care.

Our bonds are so tremendously strong and our loyalties are so immensely tight that if the tables were turned “id rather burn in a hell with what I love and respect than to abide in a so called heaven with a god that I loathe and despise. Perhaps the day will come when god will exist no more (that would be something for me to look forward to-wishful thinking!)

I do not at all fear going to a place of eternal torment. Torment for me would be spending eternity with god. A place in where I do not want to be. God is the hellfire. Many get a taste of his hell right here on earth-yet they still foolishly praise him and glorify him, to each their own.

I definitely do not care what anyone thinks or says about me, I never did. I do however get highly insulted if or when someone tries or wants to connect me in any way with their god of the bible. His scriptures, will, and so called authority has no bearing on me. I have no regard for him whatsoever and he is not above me. He is nothing but shit!

The All Seeing Truth/Not Blinded By The Lies

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My third eye is open. It is very clear and very active. I can see things and people for what and who they really are. And I can “see” and “feel” from many miles away. I have looked at pictures of people and spotted who was demonic.

There is nothing too big or too small for my spiritual antenna to “pick up” when the moment calls for it. Feeling, knowing, seeing, hearing, smelling and tasting all go hand in hand for me.

Those of us who are “in tune” do know about the unknown and do have a lot of knowledge. I knew what life was all about at a very young age, about eleven or twelve. And even though that we are aware of so much, we don’t know every single thing as there is always something to be uncovered and discovered.

We have our own different origins, belief systems and experiences so therefore we may not come in agreement regarding all or certain terms of what is fact, which definitely does not make a “claim” false or non existent.

Can anyone actually “dictate” to you what you comprehend and what you’ve experienced? Absolutely not, what is truth to one is foreign to another yet both is real but not to each other.

“God” is a subject that is controversial to some when held into question. Though he does exist, many do not believe in him or what he is supposed to represent. And the bible teaches that anyone who does not follow him and serves something “other” is being deceived by Satan himself who is suppose to be a liar.

Now I am not going to get heavy into this but I do “know” of that to indeed not be true. And I can back it up for myself even if I could not prove it to anyone else who would not agree. I don’t want to persuade no one about anything. I am here to take what I “recognize” is genuinely for me, and in accordance apply it to my life.

Very frequently, there are these public candle lit vigils and makeshift memorials that are dedicated to people who are murdered and killed. The “vigils” which are meant for the gathering of friends, family and those alike, to offer prayers on the behalf of the deceased and their relatives, and to call on god to receive the deceased into the eternal kingdom of heaven.

Although it may look pretty-the mixture of balloons, flowers, teddy bears and other articles-it is a very demonic event, especially when the individuals have died violently.

“Clean” mourning ceremonies should be regarded and held in a sacred manner, such as in a home or a particular church or temple. There are definite ways to elevate a departed soul that has crossed over into the spirit realm, but the act has to be done properly.

“He or she is with god/Jesus now”, I’ve heard so many repeat after completing their task of outside in the open public devotions. “Yes”, I will agree “they are with god”. However, who is to say that actually means this is good, and that they are in a good right place?

What those in particular have actually done is “assisted”, “bounded”, and “sealed in” an open invitation into hell for the targeted souls.

I remember some years ago, a member from a very famous rap group who came from around my old neighborhood, was shot and killed. As usual, there were people who made a display memorial outside in the open, in his honor, on a side street against a gate with candles and other articles of choice.

As a highly sensitive spiritual person passing by the scene, I felt nothing but intense negative energy. Malignant spirits were hanging all around in that spot.

Another highly public makeshift memorial event (which took place a decade ago) that also happened to be displayed alongside a gate, involved the murder of two young girls, who till this day are still given candle lit vigils upon an anniversary date.

And while lots of people believe these girls who died between the ages of twelve and thirteen, are dwelling in “a beautiful place of peace” with their lord. I guarantee for a “fact” they are not. I know firsthand.

These girls are evil spirits roaming around and getting energized every time a ritual is carried out in remembrance to them. And, their lord is right along with them as he is energized and glorified every time he indirectly perpetuates tragedy for his own “eternal” benefit.

There are a very many of secrets, cover ups, lies, manipulations and conspiracies. And some that even include affiliates of the government who are involved, as they too are instruments of evil forces.

Some everyday people know exactly what is really going on and pretend that they don’t if you are not one of them. Some actually are in the dark, not aware by the operation and activity of spiritual dimensions. Some have their own divine sustained path outlined through whatever was appointed for them. And you have a lot of others who are caught in between.

This world is bigger than all of us and sometimes way beyond our control. There is so much more that could also be said and deliberated on, and a lot is kept behind closed doors. And, sometimes that is for the best depending on the circumstance and the repercussion that may follow.

There are explanations of ”great” purpose as to why I and those in particular are able to see, feel, hear and amongst other things, know into what is hidden.

The truth always finds a way to identify itself, even if it doesn’t sit right by those who’ve been blinded by lies and deception. It isn’t a matter about who does not believe though. It is believed only to those who “matter”.

I Am Blessed So Keep Your God To Yourself!

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I recently received this message in my email. And while I totally agree with this person about the harmful effects of black magic and governments and evil demonic individuals that endeavor to enslave people through witchcraft on many levels I definitely do not at all agree about the views when it comes to “god”.

I am a real person, as real as they come. I will be thirty-seven years old in May and was not born yesterday. God is not the only “so called” way to conquer black magic. Every one has their own spiritual beliefs which definitely do not work for every individual.

I am familiar with the novena to the Holy Spirit and just like the bible it turns me off. My first encounter with the “holy bible” was during childhood and I didn’t at all like or agree with much of what I read and as I grew older during the years I continuously came to see how right and justified I was in my interpretations.

God is a master manipulator as well as demonic himself. His “so called” supernatural effects are also a form of magic (voodoo). So many and I mean a great deal of the world is blinded and brainwashed when it comes to this very negative force that is considered the “almighty”.

I will readily admit that god in his spirit has communicated with me within my lifetime, appearing as a means of help. Some years ago his spirit came and spoke to me through my empathic abilities and thoughts to impart that “to come to him and that he was my source of protection”. I refused to go to him, me personally knowing his track record and because I am not gullible or easily influenced, or desperate for that matter. And I absolutely made the right decision.

I in no way am here to change or discourage anyone who serves or truly believes in his doctrine. I could care less what anyone believes in or follows as it has absolutely nothing to do with me. I am a writer who connects with the universe and share my experiences and truths the way that I know it to be. I do, however, have a serious problem with those who may try to change or discourage my beliefs and what I know to be definite truth.

There is negativity and positivity all over the world. Even in the spirit world. And that is just the way that life is right now. All voodoo is not bad or harmful. I conquered black magic through white magic (a genuine form of a “holy spirit”) and it saved my life in many aspects. Even when I wasn’t doing it ( the supernatural has a way of working on it’s own to nurture and protect what it holds dear). Voodoo and orisha ancestor worship is my nature and has been nothing but soothing and beneficial to me and my life.

I’ve experienced so much in my life from a very early age up until now and know very much of what I speak of. Unlike many who serve god, I have never ever experimented with or been on drugs-never had the desire to. I have never been promiscuous or lustful-never had the desire to. My nature gives me so much love and respect, something “god” never gave to me. And it shouldn’t always be about what a person has or has not done but why. What was the reason for their actions?

I have never indulged in the many negative things of this world, I never desired to, and not because I am a good person or because I am a bad person, but because I am my own person who is not influenced by anything that is not of me.

I could sit here for hours debating my notions and experiences and reasons what I feel about god to anyone who’d question me, nevertheless, I wouldn’t waste my precious time.

There is a reason many in particular can’t, won’t and never will see him for the kind of spirit that he really is. And then there are those who do truly recognize him and serve him because they are truly of him.

I thank my lucky stars for who I am and for what I have centered around me. And when those who come around trying to recruit me in all kinds of underhanded ways I will always escape my true “enemy”.

Now I believe this person who contacted me meant well and I appreciate their kindness. For the record though, I have and never had any true connection with god, he and I do not mix. He is not my idea of anything truly good and I will not go any further.

Now as far as this person asking me not to “blaspheme” god, for me it comes very easily and I will never apologize for the way that I believe and feel and here are a few examples from a few of my posts:

This is part of a comment that I left for someone on my as an asexual person I’m sharing my personal feelings- June 20, 2009-

I don’t want to hear anything about what the bible says about not trusting in my own judgement of things due to the fact that we as humans are suppose to be incapable of understanding God’s plan and that he knows best for us better than we do for ourselves. I don’t agree with everything in the bible. And i don’t fear the God of the bible because he does nothing for me ( meaning that his scripture stimulates me in no way whatsoever! ), he turns me off. I am very happy in my life. As a child i always knew that God was no good for many in depth reasons that i will not go into and i don’t care what anybody thinks or has to say about it. Don’t take my comment as being angry, i’m feeling no contempt. Just letting you know that i have a mind of my own and will live my life the way that i want to under my own terms and through the guidance of my ancestors and Orisha. And i really don’t care what the bible has to say about serving anything other than him which he claims would be from the devil. I guarantee from experience Elegba is not the devil and if he turned out to be he’s done a hell of a lot more good for me than that sicko in the bible who created everybody.

My Confessions Post- january 28,2012-october4,2006-

Everyone makes mistakes and indeed this was a big one! Everything in my post is the truth except for what I mentioned about god.

I wrote this post about fives years ago and now I can come out with the total truth that I could not say at the time. I don’t really feel that I did anything wrong. I don’t really believe that the only true protection comes from the god of the bible.

My actions did not cause me to be open for any attack because I don’t believe in or follow that god of the bible’s sick will especially that garbage about a man and a woman becoming one flesh. I will always be whole and complete and no one flesh with nobody.

I truly feel that god was responsible for allowing those sick witchcraft experiences because I never cared for him and belonged to him, and I thank my lucky stars because I don’t ever want to be one of his children.

I have true supervision and protection from my ancestors and orishas like I had all through out my life I just had to get reconnected and reacquainted since I was attacked by witchcraft at such an early age ( ever since I was seven ).

Even though I didn’t truly from my heart mean what I said in this post regarding “god” I really regret having done so because I would never intentionally want to give him any type of glory or justification whatsoever!

And I know damn well that my beautiful soul will never enter a place of hell. “I’ve seen where I’m going” god of the bible has no claims over me. He does not apply to me or my life. And I am so glad that I am at a place in my life where I can acknowledge it and back it up fiercely. And I don’t give a damn what anyone who is blinded by him has to say about it!

This Is What I Received In My Email Yesterday-

Submitted Information:

Name
Caring Person

Email
“I Removed This Person’s Email Address For Their Privacy”

Comment
Dear La Toya,
I have taken a look at your website, and whereas you are creative, or an artist
poet, with talent, you are most definately
courting demon activity.
In viewing your article about Voodoo,
I thought you were concerned about how horrible and deadly it is to the body, mind, and soul. Death to the soul is eternal. The symptoms to the private parts,
is just as abusive as rape, and molestation.
Governments, and possessed persons, trying to enslave people, and kill their souls, are performing this witchcraft to destroy devout people, and too liberal people.
Here’s what works to rid it. No one in their right mind would want it. The Holy Spirit is the only conqueror of Demons. Find a copy of The Novena to The Holy Spirit, and you pray that Novena, everyday.
Recommend it to everyone.
Obtain confession for all sins, attend Divine Mercy Sunday, remain faithful to the 10 commandements, and read the Bible, everyday. The Word of God is also infused with The Holy Spirit, and you will see why
witchcraft is spreading, today. Look in Revelation, and other related scriptures.
It isn’t spreading to become popular, and create healing, or spirituality. It is spreading to kill souls, because that is what Satan (The Dragon)is doing now!
Don’t mess with it, and please use your website to help others get rid of it, and not blaspheme God.

I’ll be praying for you all.

A Revelation

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All of my life i have been able to sense and see through people. There have also and always been those in particular who i have detested. No one is going to like or get along with everybody no matter what walk of life one comes from. The hatred that i have for those who i speak of goes deeper in the eye than what most if any are able to see. What is felt is not so much a part of my innate human tendency of being snooty but more of a divine awareness of what is here and subordinate.

Some looking at particular people with the “Human Eye”, and who are conscious of what they show, may see a sight they would clearly determine as undesirables and etc. When looking through with the “Third Eye”, however, the sight goes much deeper. They are then identified more in depth.  And they “Indeed” are “The Wicked”, the devil’s children. I’ve seen it in their appearance and have sensed it in their body language. I have also seen these particular people after death in spirit form-confirming the mark made to me of those who are here on earth.

They are very recognizable. Radar picks up on them instantly, alerting, verifying and sending warning of them. When i view them in person or if the thought of them comes into mind due to visions i see their presence literally makes me want to vomit. I keep clear away from these people as much as possible. And I don’t want any parts of them in my life if i can help it.  Understandably, my reasons are of course not defined as “Fear” since these particular kinds are absolutely nothing to fear even though many of them want to intimidate others out of their own insecurities. Nevertheless, it has everything to do with negativity, and negative energies they continually carry within and without, and which can be detected and rejected. They are all an abomination. A reproach.

( These Particular People Are Warp-Minded. They Act Out In Illogical Ways. Reason Cannot Be Explained To Sick Individuals. I As A Human Being With Strong Spiritual Inclination Would Never Want Their Essence Up In Me, Outward Of Me, Or Around Me. Their Absences Brings About Peace, Happiness And Cleanliness To The Mind, Body, Spirit And Path )

My Confessions

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January 28th, 2012

Everyone makes mistakes and indeed this was a big one! Everything in my post is the truth except for what I mentioned about God.

I wrote this post about fives years ago and now I can come out with the total truth that I could not say at the time. I don’t really feel that I did anything wrong. I don’t really believe that the only true protection comes from The God Of The Bible.

My actions did not cause me to be open for any attack because I don’t believe in or follow that God of the bible’s sick “will” especially that garbage about a man and a woman becoming one flesh. I will always be whole and complete and no one flesh with nobody.

I truly feel that God was responsible for allowing those sick witchcraft experiences because I never cared for him and belonged to him, and I thank my lucky stars because I don’t ever want to be one of his children.

I have true supervision and protection from my Ancestors and Orishas like I had all through out my life I just had to get reconnected and reacquainted since I was attacked by witchcraft at such an early age ( ever since I was seven ).

Even though I didn’t truly from my heart mean what I said in this post regarding “God” I really regret having done so because I would never intentionally want to give him any type of glory or justification whatsoever!

And I know damn well that my beautiful soul will never enter a place of hell even if I ever did get an abortion. “I’ve seen where i’m going”, God Of The Bible has no claims over me. He does not apply to me or my life. And I am so glad that I am at a place in my life where I can acknowledge it and back it up fiercely. And I don’t give a damn what anyone who is blinded by him has to say about it!

Wednesday, October 04, 2006 at 8:17 PM EDT

I don’t know why I’m calling this post my confessions. I’ve never had anything to hide. What i really mean by confessing is just acknowledging more in depth how i feel about particular things regarding myself.

I am a female. A woman. And I’m very glad to be. I am strong-minded, strong-willed, determined, stubborn, confident, opinionated, outspoken and a few other things. When i was a little girl i loved to have fun just like most children and i was very creative.

A lot of children have an idea of what they want to be when they become an adult. I knew by the age of ten that i would write and that is the age that i began writing the short stories that i use to. I also knew that when i grew up that i never wanted to marry. I am thirty-one years old now and have never had a boyfriend.

So i really did know what i did and did not want early on. I also knew that one day when i was ready i would want to have two children, preferably two female children. Two daughters. My two little girls. The only problem was how would i get them? I didn’t want no man on top of me.

I thought going to a sperm bank would cost too much money for me at the time since there was no guarantee that conception would occur during the first insemination. I’ve heard of women spending up to six thousands of dollars after numerous tries before actual conception occurred through being artificially inseminated by a doctor.

So if i really wanted to have a child I’d have to do what i had to do and that would mean lying down with a man that i didn’t want. It wouldn’t have been a problem. A whole lot of men were interested in me during my younger years. They just didn’t understand why i didn’t want to be bothered since most young women are man-crazy and are heavily into a man.

I was just the opposite. A few of the reasons i paid my admirers no attention was because the majority of them were nothing, nobodies. They were in my opinion unattractive and definitely undesirable as far as their physical appearance and level of mentality. What turned me off the most, though, is them approaching me like automatically without them even knowing me, that i was suppose to have an inclination for males.

They made a general assumption about me that was definitely not true. I am Asexual and very proud of it. I’ve never ever had any emotional or physical desire for a man. When guys had crushes on me and expressed their feelings in their own ways it disgusted me where others would think that it was cute or normal. And i am very sure most consider having a crush on someone then acting on it normal.

I felt if a guy was attracted to me and wanted to be with me he should have kept it to himself because he didn’t stand a chance with me. Then i began to think about it a little bit, and thought about using a man’s feelings for me to my advantage. You know when someone is into you and you are not into them then you have the upper hand.

Some of the guys who were interested in me had heard that i was a virgin and probably thought ( in their mind if they were to ever get the chance) by having sex with me they could turn me out or that i would change and become attached to them and fall all over them then a man would have some significance to me. Boy did they have me figured out wrong! Some of those male egos and ignorance’s need to go! There is a whole lot that some men really need to learn.

Yes, i was a virgin as far as never ever having intercourse with a man. A male penis had never penetrated my vagina but i had already experienced sexual pleasure without the aid of a man.

You see, i had discovered my clitoris years beforehand. It is a very sensitive area connected to nerves inside the body that with the educated touch of a finger ( i learned naturally on my own ) there are very nice sensations and climaxes to experience. There is absolutely nothing wrong with self experimentation, getting to know and love your own self sexually before letting someone else take control. But when a man is inside of you he is not the one really in control of giving you your pleasure.

It is all up to you and your mind whether or not your body will allow his penis to ignite those sensations. You have to already have an attraction or desire for a man in order to feel any pleasure from him. This particular subject is not embarrassing and it should not be. It is important.

When i was a little girl i curiously took a mirror to see what my vagina looked like. What’s wrong with that? Nothing! None of these things mean that you are being a bad girl or fresh. It is being smart and knowledgeable.

During the very first and only time period i tried to get pregnant by attempting sexual intercourse i felt absolutely nothing, no kind of sensation or pleasure whatsoever from the penis i endured because i had no desire and emotion to be with any male. On the other hand though, i could go and stimulate my clitoris on my own while i was alone and feel all the pleasure in the world because my mind was happily accepting that i was the one who was causing sensations received by myself.

My mind and body was and is not receptive to the thought of being touched by a man since nothing about a man arouses me. My body doesn’t want something pounding inside and out, that is just plain stupid! During clitoral stimulation, there is no penetration. Only i can arouse myself as i am in love with myself. And i haven’t ever been with any other man since. That was years ago. And for the future there won’t be another one.

My vagina is strictly off limits as it has always been. There is no man anywhere around me or in my neighborhood who can honestly say that they had me or will have me because now i have the money to go to a sperm bank if i really want to.

Even if i didn’t have the money i still would not resort to lying down with a man because that is not who i am and because to me it is so unnatural. My clitoris is natural. I was born with it. I know how to take care of myself. If i want a vaginal massage, i prefer myself.

When and if i eventually do get pregnant, like i mentioned before I’d prefer to have girls. My girls because i know they’d be very similar to me i have very strong genes. If i unfortunately get pregnant with a boy I’d be very pissed off and disappointed then I’d go seek an abortion. You see, there is no way in the world that i would want or have anything male growing up inside of me.

I know the way that i feel goes against God’s will just as fornication. God would prefer that i get married then have children and accept the children no matter what the sex is especially since I’m so spiritually blessed the way that i am.

However, i have my own will. And it goes against God’s. Now i live a very clean life as it is. I never went astray. I fornicated on only one occasion and that was done purely to make a baby and not out of any type of lust but i think the act itself left me open and vulnerable to the attack of evil spirits when my enemies worked their witchcraft.

Protection comes with God’s Holy Spirit and his spirit is not to be defiled by any spiritual uncleanliness. Now while witchcraft was unable to affect my strength, mind, actions and emotions it was able to affect my progress in life by interfering with my destiny.

So it wasn’t so much about my enemies having the ability to attack me it was that at the hands of my own actions i gave them the opportunity by disobeying God and defiling his Holy Spirit. If i had been married the act would’ve been clean.

Nevertheless, you know what? I still say even though i am spiritually restored now i don’t think that was fair. And life is not fair. I am a very good person and i don’t deny the power and works of the Lord but my heart is hardened against the way God set certain things.

The only real big sin that i was and am guilty of is rebellion. I still refuse to want to do it the Lord’s way by getting married to have a child and I’d still get an abortion or want to if i ever get pregnant with a male child. If i did get married I’d just be using the man for what i want. It just wouldn’t work out.

I lose patience in just two weeks of being around a man. And like i said before I’d never have any sexual dealings with a man as long as i live so if i lose God’s partial protection again by trying to conceive a child out of wedlock through going to a sperm bank and getting rid of a fetus because it turns out to be a boy then the Lord is just not right. My feelings will never change even if i risk spending an eternity burning in hell for it.