Salvation (Eternal Security)

Walking With Jesus

In my late teens, while I was having a weekly bible study, I had mentioned to my group members the trouble I was undergoing in my neighborhood with fellow teens and adults who were jealous of me for not doing and not having done the things that they were doing. I lived a totally different lifestyle than what they all did.

One lady from my bible study specifically pointed to a particular verse of scripture and then spoke it out loud to me. It read: They are puzzled that you do not continue running with them in the same decadent course of debauchery, so they speak abusively of you. 1 Peter 4:4

Although I had never indulged within the same behaviors as certain neighborhood folk, I had cut loose those who I had grown up with and refused to be bothered with others who were not of good character…

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God’s Summon

My mother and I had gone through quite a few things and challenges through life for many years, years ago, yet we would always get through those situations remarkably and victoriously.

We, of course, experienced a lot of good times too along with plenty of really nice and supernatural blessings that had indeed come from God.

Even though, I still blamed God for having to go through negativity whether it was on account of people, principalities, or just the circumstances of living within a fallen world that I felt I didn’t ask to come into.

I have to admit that I was very strong in prayer and putting effort into developing a relationship with God to the best of my ability in trying to understand his will and plans back then.

Sometimes I did still have doubts about the authenticity of God’s goodness.

Whenever I would talk against him for whatever seemed to me to be unfair, cruel, or unright within life, my mother would always say that “It is not God, it is the people”. And she would always emphasize that God was good and how he was always good to her throughout her life.

My mother’s faith in the goodness of God was very strong compared to mine.

I always knew and believed in the power that he had but started to not completely trust in him as a good God as I focused more on the things I felt he allowed to happen in our personal lives, and within the world in general.

I couldn’t grasp God as truly being this loving, caring, reasonable source of light in a world full of permitted darkness. After all, nothing can go on unless God allows it too.

I looked at God as an evil or wrathful spirit looking to readily catch people in wrong-doing with the eagerness to punish or to send them to hell. I especially, believed that he had something personally against me and eventually came to the idea that it had to be other sources of light looking out and after me because I just couldn’t fathom how God worked sometimes.

It seems very contradicting to have been born with a caul and have God be against me (not saying that God is naturally against anyone). However, my mother along with a few others had told me that I sometimes would think “backwards”.

I cannot deny in all truth how God had been exceptional in our lives. Again, I think I focused more on the bad than the good things at times.

God has made a strong and grave stance to draw me back to him recently. He wants me to come to fully know and to understand the true nature of him, his word, and his glorious plans for me.

I never actually thought I’d speak these words. I was so angry at God for allowing witchcraft to be done on me as a child on up by jealous, envious, ill-minded individuals. And I had resented how the same types of toxic and undesirable individuals seemed to constantly be placed within my paths.

God wants me to know and to understand that he genuinely does love me. He wants me to focus totally on him and to have eternal life through the truth of his word and righteousness. He doesn’t want the devil to steal away and/or kill me with lies of where the source of my foundation, maintenance and protection resides.

God wants me to acknowledge and give glory to him. He wants me to use my spiritual gifts and experiences whether extraordinary or ordinary as testimony and encouragement instead of speaking against him out of any misinterpretation.

In order for me to comply the event had to be of sincerity and a true desire from within. As an authentic individual, I wanted everything to be from the heart; because that is how I operate. The spirit is definitely within me.

God didn’t knock on my door this time-he barged on in with urgency. An urgency of love and concern, an action he did not have to do. We have such little time here on earth and he wanted me to take heed to acknowledge his sovereignty and bring me closer to him.

In putting him first, he isn’t trying to hurt me he informed. He just wants me to learn to trust him while he takes care of the rest.

God doesn’t want my soul to be in jeopardy-and certainly not over a misunderstanding of who he is. God has a way of getting our attention even if it’s through a tragedy.

God knows our true hearts and motives and may correct but not punish out of unintentional error.

It is definitely true, he never abandons his children, even when some of us shy away from him. Even when I kept away he kept near not letting me fall. He won’t let anything separate those of us who truly belong to him.

Eternal Life/The Transition

I came across this post that, to me, is ultimately beautiful. Here it is:

(https://www.epm.org/blog/2020/Jun/3/loved-ones-experiencing-heaven)

What Are My Loved Ones Experiencing in the Present Heaven?

BY RANDY ALCORN  JUNE 3, 2020

A reader wrote, “I just finished the book Heaven. Knowing Jesus, I found it inspiring and well documented. I was disappointed there wasn’t more mentioned about the immediate Heaven, the one right after we leave this earth. I just lost a loved one and would like more information and clarity about what she is experiencing. I have read three books on Heaven, read a lot about the New Earth, but little about what happens when I die.”

While my book Heaven centers on the New Earth, the eternal Heaven, a few chapters deal with the present Heaven. When a Christian dies he enters what theologians call the “intermediate state,” a transitional period between life on Earth and the future resurrection to life on the New Earth. Usually when we talk about “Heaven,” we mean the place that Christians go when they die. When we tell our children “Grandma’s now in Heaven,” we’re referring to what I prefer to call the present Heaven (the word intermediate sometimes confuses people).

Books on Heaven often fail to distinguish between the intermediate and eternal states, using the one word—Heaven—as all-inclusive. But this is an important distinction. The present Heaven is a temporary lodging, a waiting place (a delightful one!) until the return of Christ and our bodily resurrection. The eternal Heaven, the New Earth, is our true home, the place where we will live forever with our Lord and each other. The great redemptive promises of God will find their ultimate fulfillment on the New Earth, not in the present Heaven. God’s children are destined for life as resurrected beings on a resurrected Earth.

Though the present Heaven is not our final destination, it’s a wonderful place, and it’s understandable that those who have had loved ones die in Christ wonder what life is like for them there. Based on the Bible’s teaching, we know several things: the present Heaven is a real (and possibly physical) place. Those who love Jesus and trust Him for their salvation will be with Him there, together with all who have died in Christ. We will be awake and cognizant. And because we will be with Jesus, it is “better by far” than our present existence.

The Present Heaven Is a Real Place

Heaven is normally invisible to those living on Earth. For those who have trouble accepting the reality of an unseen realm, consider the perspective of researchers who embrace string theory. Scientists at Yale, Princeton, and Stanford, among others, have postulated that there are ten unobservable dimensions and likely an infinite number of imperceptible universes. If this is what some scientists believe, why should anyone feel self-conscious about believing in one unobservable dimension, a realm containing angels and Heaven and Hell?

The Bible teaches that sometimes humans are allowed to see into Heaven. When Stephen was being stoned because of his faith in Christ, he gazed into Heaven: “Stephen, full of the Holy Spirit, looked up to heaven and saw the glory of God, and ­Jesus standing at the right hand of God. ‘Look,’ he said, ‘I see heaven open and the Son of Man standing at the right hand of God’” (Acts 7:55-56). Scripture tells us not that Stephen dreamed this, but that he actually saw it.

Wayne Grudem points out that Stephen “did not see mere symbols of a state of existence. It was rather that his eyes were opened to see a spiritual dimension of reality which God has hidden from us in this present age, a dimension which none the less ­really does exist in our space/time universe, and within which ­Jesus now lives in his physical resurrected body, waiting even now for a time when he will return to earth.”

I agree with Grudem that the present Heaven is a space/time universe. He may be right that it’s part of our own universe, or it may be in a different universe. It could be a universe next door that’s normally hidden but sometimes opened. In any case, I don’t think God gave Stephen a vision in order to make Heaven appear physical. Rather, He allowed Stephen to see a present Heaven that was (and is) physical.

The prophet Elisha asked God to give his servant, Gehazi, a glimpse of the invisible realm. He prayed, “‘O Lord, open his eyes so he may see.’ Then the Lord opened the servant’s eyes, and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha” (2 Kings 6:17). Acts 7 and 2 Kings 6 are narrative accounts, historical in nature, not apocalyptic or parabolic literature. The text is clear that Stephen and Gehazi saw real things.

The Present Heaven May Be a Physical Place

If we look at Scripture, we’ll see considerable evidence that the present Heaven has physical properties. We’re told there are scrolls in Heaven, elders who have faces, martyrs who wear clothes, and even people with palm branches in their hands. There are musical instruments in the present Heaven, horses coming into and out of Heaven, and an eagle flying overhead in Heaven.

Many commentators dismiss the possibility that any of these passages in Revelation should be taken literally, on the grounds that the book of Revelation is apocalyptic literature, which is known for its figures of speech. But the book of Hebrews isn’t apocalyptic, it’s epistolary. Moses was told, in building the earthly Tabernacle, “Be sure that you make everything according to the pattern I have shown you here on the mountain.” If that which was built after the pattern was physical, might it suggest the original was also physical? The book of Hebrews seems to say that we should see Earth as a derivative realm and Heaven as the source realm.

Unlike God and the angels, who are in essence spirits (John 4:24; Hebrews 1:14), human beings are by nature both spiritual and physical. God did not create Adam as a spirit and place it inside a body. Rather, He first created a body, then breathed into it a spirit. There was never a moment when a human being existed without a body. We are not essentially spirits who inhabit bodies; we are essentially as much physical as we are spiritual. We cannot be fully human without both a spirit and a body.

Given the consistent physical descriptions of the intermediate Heaven and those who dwell there, it seems possible—though this is certainly debatable—that between our earthly lives and our bodily resurrection God may grant us some temporary physical form that will allow us to function as human beings while in that unnatural state “between bodies” awaiting our bodily resurrection. If so, that would account for the repeated depictions of people now in Heaven occupying physical space, wearing clothes and crowns, carrying branches, and having body parts (for example, Lazarus’s finger in Luke 16:24).

A fundamental article of the Christian faith is that the resurrected Christ now dwells in Heaven. We are told that His resurrected body on Earth was physical and that this same, physical Jesus ascended to Heaven, from where He will one day return to Earth. It seems indisputable, then, to say that there is at least one physical body in the present Heaven. If Christ’s body in the intermediate Heaven has physical properties, it stands to reason that others in Heaven could have physical forms as well, even if only temporary ones.

To avoid misunderstanding, I need to emphasize a critical doctrinal point. According to Scripture, we do not receive resurrection bodies immediately after death. Resurrection does not happen one at a time. If we have intermediate forms in the intermediate Heaven, they will not be our true bodies, which we leave behind at death.

So if we are given material forms when we die (and I’m suggesting this possibility only because of the many Scriptures depicting physical forms in the present Heaven), they would be temporary vessels. Any understanding of people having physical forms immediately after death that would lead us to conclude that the future resurrection has already happened or is unnecessary is emphatically wrong!

We’ll Be Together with Christ and Those Who Love Him

As painful as death is, and as right as it is to grieve it (Jesus did), we on this dying Earth can also rejoice for our loved ones who are in the presence of Christ. When they die, those covered by Christ’s blood are experiencing the joy of Christ’s presence in a place so wonderful that Christ called it Paradise.

As the apostle Paul tells us, though we naturally grieve at losing loved ones, we are not “to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope” (1 Thessalonians 4:13). Our parting is not the end of our relationship, only an interruption. We have not “lost” them, because we know where they are. And one day, we’re told, in a magnificent reunion, they and we “will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage each other with these words” (1 Thessalonians 4:17-18).

Peter tells us, “You will receive a rich welcome into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ” (2 Peter 1:11). God is the main welcomer, no doubt.  All eyes are on Jesus, the Cosmic Center, the Source of all Happiness. But wouldn’t it make sense for the secondary welcomers to be God’s people, those who touched our lives, and whose lives we touched? Wouldn’t that be a great greeting party?

Jesus said, “There is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents” (Luke 15:10). Angels probably rejoice too, but the ones living in the presence of angels Jesus refers to are likely God’s people, redeemed human beings, some of who knew and loved and prayed for the conversion of these sinners, and now are beholding the answers to their prayers. Wouldn’t such people be a natural part of the welcome committee when we enter Heaven?

I envision glorious reunions and amazing introductions, conversations and storytelling at banquets and on walks, jaws dropping and laughter long and hard, the laughter of Jesus being the most contagious.

When I enter Heaven, I look forward to being hugged by my dear mother, who I led to Christ when I was a new believer in high school. Then I picture Mom, that broad smile on her face, presenting me with my sixth grandchild. In 2013 my daughter Angie had a miscarriage. This was a very painful time for our family, but one more reason I am looking forward to Heaven. When this happens, I will look at Jesus, nodding my thanks to the One with the nail-scarred hands, and I will not let my grandchild or my mother go.

Those in the Present Heaven Are Awake and Alive

That we’ll receive “a rich welcome” necessitates that at death, we will be awake and conscious. Christ depicted Lazarus and the rich man as conscious in Heaven and Hell immediately after they died (Luke 16:22-31). Jesus told the dying thief on the cross, “Today you will be with me in paradise” (Luke 23:43). The apostle Paul said that to die was to be with Christ (Philippians 1:23), and to be absent from the body was to be present with the Lord (2 Corinthians 5:8). After their deaths, martyrs are pictured in Heaven, crying out to God to bring justice on Earth (Revelation 6:9-11).

These passages clearly teach that there is no such thing as “soul sleep,” or a long period of unconsciousness between life on Earth and life in Heaven. The phrase “fallen asleep” (in 1 Thessalonians 4:13 and similar passages) is a euphemism for death, describing the body’s outward appearance. The spirit’s departure from the body ends our existence on Earth. The physical part of us “sleeps” until the resurrection, while the spiritual part of us relocates to a conscious existence in Heaven (Daniel 12:2-3; 2 Corinthians 5:8).

Every reference in Revelation to human beings talking and worshiping in Heaven prior to the resurrection of the dead demonstrates that our spiritual beings are conscious, not sleeping, after death. (Nearly everyone who believes in soul sleep believes that souls are disembodied at death; it’s not clear how disembodied beings could sleep, because sleeping involves a physical body.)

As awake and conscious beings, those in Heaven are free to ask God questions (Revelation 6:9-11), which means they have an audience with God. It also means they can and do learn. They wouldn’t be asking questions if they already knew the answers. In Heaven, people desire understanding and pursue it. There is also time in the present Heaven. People are aware of time’s passing and are eager for the coming day of the Lord’s judgment. God answers that the martyrs must “rest a little longer.” Waiting requires the passing of time. I see no reason to believe that the realities of this passage apply only to one group of martyrs and to no one else in Heaven. We should assume that what is true of them is also true of our loved ones already there, and it will be true of us when we die.

Life in Christ’s Presence Is Better by Far

Paul says, “For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.… I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far” (Philippians 1:21, 23). Life in the Heaven we go to when we die, where we’ll dwell prior to our bodily resurrection, is “better by far” than living here on Earth under the Curse, away from the direct presence of God.

Paul spoke from experience. He had actually been taken into Heaven years before writing those words (2 Corinthians 12:1–6). He knew firsthand what awaited him in Paradise. He wasn’t speculating when he called it gain. To be in the very presence of Jesus, enjoying the wonders of His being, and to be with God’s people and no longer subject to sin and suffering? “Better by far” is an understatement!

King David wrote, “In Your presence is fullness of joy; at Your right hand are pleasures forevermore” (Psalm 16:11, NKJV). In the presence of God, there’s nothing but joy. Those who live in the presence of Christ find great happiness in worshiping God and living as righteous beings in rich fellowship in a sinless environment. And because God is continuously at work on Earth, the saints watching from Heaven have a great deal to praise Him for, including God’s drawing people on Earth to Himself (Luke 15:7, 10).

Our loved ones now in Heaven live in a place where joy is the air they breathe, and nothing they see on earth can diminish their joy. Their joy doesn’t depend on ignorance, but perspective, drawn from the Christ in whose presence they live. If you’re following Jesus, no doubt your loved ones there are rejoicing over you. The great cloud of witnesses of Hebrews 12 is now up in the stands of Heaven and watching you on the same playing field they once ran on. They’re looking forward to hearing Jesus say “Well done” to you, and they may also commend you for your service of Jesus!

But those in the present Heaven are also looking forward to Christ’s return, their bodily resurrection, the final judgment, and the fashioning of the New Earth from the ruins of the old. Only then and there, in the eternal Heaven, the home Jesus is preparing for us, will all evil and suffering and sorrow be washed away by the hand of God. Only then and there will we experience the fullness of joy intended by God and purchased for us by Christ, who we will forever praise!

 

Eyes Of The Soul: Sweet Reward

Many people hate or have hated god for personal reasons of their own even if they won’t admit to it.

As a true spiritual person who was definitely born with the caul, and the family lineage to back up naturally inherent occult power, I speak from experience.

When I was a young girl, even though I had a lot of advantages, fortunate luck, and blessings, I never felt that God was truly good or any sincere positive energy from him.

I have extremely intense empathic faculties, and I am usually on point. So God is not perfect and good within my definition of what a good and perfect god really is, or should be.

When I went through hard times as a youngster on up I’d often see an extremely shiny twinkle in the sign of a cross appear before me, acknowledging to me “I’m here, I’m with you, everything is going to be alright”.

Everything did turn out alright, however, what was the purpose of going through the nonsense of whatever would be the trial within the first place? All these tribulations did was cause me to resent God even more than I already had.

I was already disgusted in the way he designed certain things within creation. Then, to include me as one of the beings to inhabit a life here on this Earth filled with sick people and morbid principalities in which I have no tolerance or patience for, was a complete insult.

If I could have used my gifts to rid the world that I did not ask to come into from all of the things that turned me off I would have done it immediately. If I was able to have gotten off the Earth and into a special place where what’s going on here wasn’t permitted, and/or where certain people and things didn’t exist, the circumstance would have been even better.

Years ago, when I gave god the benefit of the doubt in regard to my perceptions of him, I was always disappointed by him and my outcomes. When I constantly put myself first is when I noticed I was the happiest and more fulfilled.

If I truly don’t like or don’t want something within my life then it is not going to work out; it has always been this way with me. I have to do it my way. I am too strong and self-willed.

I wholeheartedly love myself, my mind-the way I think, and the way I am.

Having extrasensory perception/second-sight enabled me to experience life within many extraordinary modes that I have learned and discovered quite a lot from.

Later on, when I fully became aware of my ancestors and orishas presence around me things opened up further and brought to me a clearer understanding of who really had my best interest in spirit.

God is often called a god of love, he is nothing but a disgrace to me. If God is supposed to be the true definition of love, perfection, fairness or truth I don’t want any of the perversion around me.

The devil, is often blamed for the negative effects initiated by so called inborn sin and the inequities of the world. Yet, who allows the devil to reign upon the physical/material plane? Why wasn’t he stopped at the beginning?

The devil and god are one and the same to me.

Oh so many answers and hidden truths that have been revealed to me that I’d never openly share or discuss! I just had to speak my mind.

I definitely know what love, fairness, and truth is and no god of perfection would operate within the manner in which he does.

The energy influence of god years ago was suffocating, manipulative, and unnatural.

Spiritually, I breathe free now, unbound by blockage, and I continue to flourish through the natural beauty of my surrounding essence.

 

Intangible Peace

Luck and fortunate circumstance have never been a stranger within my life when it came to particular occurrences.

I’ve constantly been having a lot of great luck; the universe is very consistent. My family and I are blessed.

The positive energy within and around my family and I that exudes out into the atmosphere generates a magnetism to continuously reflect back accordingly.

My beloved and respected Ancestors and Orishas guard with a fierce peace, power, and protection each and every day.

In the past, we’ve had to go through so much in life due to the many unsavory and demonic people who unfortunately inhabit the earth without them being able to conquer our spirits, or the essence that shines over us.

However, when we are good/spiritual people a huge percent of us have to battle with the lost souls and principalities of the world, and beyond.

The most important element of the situation is that we successfully made it through as those of us with strong faith and foresight knew we inevitably would.

We did not fret when certain events infuriated us and brought out the inner vigilante derived from our strength.

We knew the day would come when the universe would snag the unscrupulous up into the clutches of its supernatural jaws to display for our warranted observation.

We are often allowed the privilege to satisfactorily witness the retributions of spiritual vindication granted by the powers that be.

 

Cozy Night At Home Enjoying A Classic

We have such a peaceful home and a nice, quiet life.

Last night at 8pm my mother and I watched the 1976 Stephen King classic thriller “Carrie” on Showtime.

We hadn’t seen the film in a while (even though we’ve seen it numerous times in the distant past through out the years) and we both reflected on the movie and agreed that it was such a great film. They just don’t make genuine quality horror films like that anymore.

Race With The Devil” was another great 1975 classic horror movie and one that was underrated, it is also an all time favorite of mine.

My mother and I were always fierce hanging partners. When I was a little girl she use to take me to the movie theater to see just about everything I wanted to see. We have a great relationship and still enjoy our entertainment together.

Months back on HBO we watched the last installment of Halloween (2018) with Jamie Lee Curtis who had made her return. It was a very good horror flick, not corny at all!

Insecure People

Working Woman By Miss LaToya

It all starts within the home.

I had and was given so much love and attention at home that I never sort out to find love elsewhere.

Love made me confident, love made me strong, love made me secure, and no one can take away what was instilled in me from the beginning.

I have a very high self esteem and I am very sure of myself I have never desired, needed, or looked for social acceptance or validation from anyone.

I don’t understand people who do.

I don’t like people who reflect their own insecurities and negativities onto me, and onto others who exude a genuine and a positive self image, and attitude.

Those whose self esteem is so low that they interpret self assurance and strong sense of self as being full of oneself is all too self-telling.

It seems that some who are unable to reach a…

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Mother, And I

My mother and I went out and had a wonderful time today as we always enjoy one another’s company.

We don’t allow outside influence to interfere within our contentment we have no tolerance for anyone’s negativity.

No one can turn us against each other under no circumstance. I am her daughter, she is my mother, what kind of obnoxious and outrageous shit is that?

Those who have no bond of loyalty and love between a relative, or relatives, hate to see others experience the joy and beauty of authentic unity.

We have a pleasant life, we have great peace of mind, and we are truly happy inside, especially not having any undesirable people around us.

We only accept those flying on an exceptional vibe, full of positive energy, and no bullshit!

 

Blocked Witchcraft Attempt

As a child I wasn’t sheltered. I’d seen and heard a lot and encountered numerous types of people and situations while at the same time not being negatively influenced within my own behavior by incorporating undesirable habits or lifestyle choices, yet informed, as I had a mind of my own.

I had firsthand experience without having to personally indulge in order to know and since I was spiritually inclined I was able to clearly discern things that were hidden under the surface and I definitely knew what appealed to me and what turned me off and what I wanted to avoid as I grew up in life.

One of my strongest points is my excellent communication skills and comprehension. What I lack though is a sympathetic nature toward people and the world in general. I do love the hell out of puppies and dogs, though, they just steal my heart. They’re so innocent, sincere, and lovable those little adorable fuckers.

Since I nipped that “Think Of Me Spell” in the bud last week another corresponding negative technique was put in motion to run its trifling course. It’s definitely witchcraft yet all it has done is give me a off and on headache.

The motive is to drain me of my good energy and luck to render me vulnerable to the effects of whatever negativity and negative energy in which they gear toward me as they have failed so badly with endeavoring to bring me down and to destroy me.

These idiots are continuing to further ruin themselves through attempting to cause my demise. I am a very good and blessed person and I am and will constantly be guided and protected by divine intervention.

Adversaries are actually hurt because I am not at all hurt or affected by the negativity and dirt they’ve directed toward me within the past and by the negativity and dirt in which some of them still continue to direct toward me now.

They are infuriated by the love I have for myself, my high self esteem, the love and respect I have around me, and the fact that they are unable to stop me from living my life and speaking the truth.

I am a writer by nature, I have a gift, and I am naturally motioned by spirit to utilize and exercise creatively, honestly, and productively whenever inspired. There is power in the universe to those of us who are endowed.

It deeply frustrates them how they cannot get to me emotionally or mentally. And I can “feel” their upsets within my body through intense empathic ability. So they couldn’t deny it even if they wanted to. Feeling and being able to perceive other peoples emotions has always been one of my dominant faculties as a highly spiritually inclined person.

They’re going to drive themselves crazy with trying to hurt or thwart me with things and circumstances in which do not faze me. I’m not the average person. I’ve always been on a entirely different level and will never be hurt by their words, lies, jealousies, ignorant thinking, malicious deeds and etc…

Of course, when somebody comes up against me I will take up for myself or fight back as I am a very feisty and strong individual. And I definitely will correct anyone who comes at me with the wrong approach. One doesn’t have to be hurt to retaliate out of hatred, vengeance, or justification these instances have absolutely nothing to do with being hurt within certain types of people. Everyone is different and does not act out for the same reasons or under the same intention.

Although I do realize many of my adversaries have been hurt by me as I have not been too friendly or receptive to their kind (as I’ve never been fond of their type and those with similar traits and mindsets) yet they hurt themselves by ignorantly making assumptions and adhering to preconceived notions while really knowing the real deal then proceeding to carry out nonsense due to pure spite and resentment.

(God) A Supernatural Bully

I am and always was blessed within many ways at the same time had to undergo unnatural encounters just because of the person that I am.

I’m glad not to be average and that I’m unique in my own right. I don’t owe anyone anything and I didn’t ask to come into this world to share within a life with other human beings with different natures and various mindsets.

The Lord did me no favor whatsoever as in my dreams when I sleep display and explain more beauty and meaning than on this earthly plane that he created.

God didn’t ask my permission in order for me to come here so I don’t need his while I have to remain here. Like I said, he didn’t do me any favor, this world isn’t a paradise that I should be ever so grateful to exist in.

The world in its dreadful condition is grotesquely overpopulated as it is with all kinds of shit. From disgusting insects to disgusting animals, disgusting principalities, and disgusting people.

Life is often times strange, unfair, and full of circumstantial misinterpretation and situations that compromise the lives of people on account of the ignorance or biases of others.

It seemed irresponsible to me to have us all here on the earth together why not keep the compatible in one section and the incompatible in other sections let everyone have their own suitable accomodating place of habitat.

Why be made to live a life or in a condition that one truly doesn’t want to be in? I loathe God, I truly do, and for more reasons than one, and I feel so insulted to be one that was created in his perverted formation of a plan.

From the beginning by designing a man and a woman to be together and to have sex, and having to have sex to have children, is all a turn off to me. Cutting up animals in the old days to atone for a sin since the wages for transgressions was death there had to be bloodshed so finally Jesus eventually came and did the ultimate sacrifice, all a bunch of sick shit to me.

But I guess I’m suppose to be crazy for not liking or agreeing with a God and within the fashion in which he made things to occur.

One thing is for certain and that is that I genuinely do love myself. When I look back on my life as a child I’ve noticed how disrespected I was by God and how I never trusted in him because I knew deep down inside that he was no good.

He disrespected me and my life one time too many by altering my destiny, using his trash to assist him, and by placing too many undesirables within my pathways, knowing the extent of my hatred toward them.

I always wondered who the fuck he thought he was as I never thought too highly of him or his reasoning. As I have the gifts to see I never saw anything special or perfect within him.

It is said that God makes no mistakes and if that is so that is a dangerous reality. At least if he made errors I could give him the benefit of the doubt but since his intentions are meant as what is suppose to be right it shows me just how wrong he is as a creator.

God is a disgrace and it clearly shows within his creation.

It seems to me I’m too headstrong for him whereas his trash caters to his demented teachings as they are twisted too.

If his words are so true why am I happier without him? If his words are so true why do I have peace of mind without him? If his words are so true why is the energy around me good without him?

I didn’t began to really live until I recognized my true love and light and separated myself from God’s oppressing grip and because I’ve broken free (years ago) and confirmed his unsavory nature he doesn’t want me to live the life that I am suppose to fully receive.

So even though he adheres to keep me stuck in a rut the rut does not adhere to stick to my spirit.

I’d rather live my life within truth, love, and strength and be cheated from what I truly deserve than to live within lies, unhappiness, and weakness just to be given an abundance of riches for being a mindless flunky only to serve and praise a God that is not worthy to be glorified.

If one could take away God’s power where would that leave him if he didn’t have all that supernatural weight to throw around and bully with? If he was void of his mighty energy to manifest how many would fear him then? -miss latoya lawrence

 

 

Happy Birthday To Me

I don’t officially celebrate my birthday yet I do acknowledge the occasion

Forty-four years ago I was born on this earth. My birthday always falls right after mother’s day.

When we are a lot younger it seems as if our life goes by kind of slow then once we get measurably older and reminisce back it kind of seems as if life ran by us so fast.

I’ve been on this planet for a very long time yet I am still considered young and it is true to a point but it is funny how when people describe being married for forty years, living in a house for forty years, owning an item for forty years and etc… It is all looked upon as being a long period of duration compared to the actual age of a person.

Nevertheless, I am very content within my life at the present moment and am proud of my age, I have no major regrets throughout my journey here, and I have a whole bunch of great memories to glance back at with a beautiful sense of nostalgia.

I love being forty-four as I feel really good inside and continue to welcome the distinct progressions that my unique experience has to offer.

Every Day Is Mother’s Day And Thanks Giving

Mother’s Day And Thanksgiving

They’re celebrated once a year on specific days yet isn’t every day a day to be thankful for something and to appreciate a good mom?

Of, course, so!

A mother’s love is priceless and cannot ever be replaced. A real mother should be celebrated everyday and within every way that is appropriate to one’s own meaningful  demonstrative expression.

One doesn’t have to actually give birth to become a mother, either, just because a woman has a baby does not automatically qualify or certify her as a genuine or capable parent.

Its about what is in the heart and mind of a person as well as their intentions and deed.

There are some that choose to adopt children which do or that do not have any biological connection to them or within their families, there are also some that take on the role of caregiver, bestowing solicitous attention to others whether personally or on a professional level.

And don’t forget many of us that are pet parents! We raise, nurture, protect, teach and adore our canines as well, the instance and position is a legitimate one.

There is so much to be grateful, thankful, or mindful of all the time even if it’s just something minor.

So to me, gratitude is a constant everlasting event to be observed and celebrated with the things and the people that truly count.

Blessed

Another new year is about to come in and things are going my way and working in my favor as I continue to elevate and advance even further mentally and spiritually as usual as I was always ahead of my time.

When I look back at how all the jealous people had tried to interfere and bring me down within my life since childhood on up with lies, mind games, manipulations, black magic/voodoo/witchcraft and so on I just don’t understand why they all wasted their time yet one cannot explain logic and reason to deeply sick and disturbed individuals that redefine the true meaning of what being morbidly twisted actually represents.

They couldn’t take away my self-love, they couldn’t take away my high self-esteem, they couldn’t take away my intelligence, they couldn’t take away my strength, they couldn’t take away my confidence, they couldn’t take away my gifts and talents so what was the purpose?

They also definitely couldn’t take away the intense and genuine love, protection, respect, distinction and blessings that surround within my energetic field as they so desperately wanted that beauty and wellness for themselves but would never receive such an honor as the privilege and specialness was never meant for those of an inadequate and degenerate nature.

I was never happy within the way the world is and I never will be as I am not and never will be a part of this world.

I continue to want no part of it but I am so happy with my self and genuinely have so much love, peace, and security that steadfastly resides from within.

I am ever so grateful to the universe for being on point and constantly delivering I have faith in what to expect due to the loyalty though I never take anything for granted as I accept appreciatively.

What is around me you never cease to amaze me, truly awesome! – latoya lawrence

Inner Voice

Spirit is and has constantly been there for me. Spirit has never let me down and that is so amazing to me. And it is so astonishing because although that I have tremendous faith in what I know and believe still I never take anything for granted and I think that is why I continue to be carried so securely by spirit.

The celestial support that I unceasingly receive is very touching and so much appreciated and it is also additionally grounding. I naturally and genuinely treasure what is surrounding me and as I am in harmony and in balance with the quintessence of my existence, the alignment of my dimensional position within the universe that is in relation to inclination, I thrive.

The peace that is around me is so wonderful.

I was always a positive individual that exuded positive energy and I always knew what was going to work for me and what wasn’t going to work out from a very early age because I always had a very strong sense of self. And as my energy was always good it was always the negative energies of others that would constantly interfere.

Just the simple condition of not being within the presence of certain types of people (especially undesirables) is so rejuvenating and liberating, and oh so very healthy for the mind, aura and spirit. That circumstance has consistently been a major factor to my happiness and well-being as a highly spiritual individual.

Everything is so clear, clean, and beautiful living in the compatible arrangement of my own preordained nature. A nature of authentic serenity that some of us are blessed with when we continue to choose and remain on the paths that are correct for us.

When we hear and listen to that inner voice of spirit it never guides us in the wrong direction we become one within distinction and within the truths of our lives and where we’re going.

Spirit helps us to make important decisions, gives us the confidence and courage to take risks and to make the most vital of changes that prove to all turn out for the better and I am a living testimony!

Love is so durable and I feel it all around me and I just love the love. Love makes us strong, love makes us powerful, and love makes us who we are! Love is not corny yet it is often underestimated and it is why spirit has us within the first place.

Without the love, care, and protection of the specific energies around those of us in particular we’d be lost and alone as long as we have the loves of the light we will prevail.

 

A Family Affair

I have two more sets each of census  records (again of my mother’s mother side of the family) both listed from 1-80 as there are 1-35 pages (too many to post I’d be here all day that I gathered from Ancestry.com) each of family members that were recorded back in the year of 1940 (many family that are known to us and some that are not because we never met everybody within our lineage) and it is not a constantly repeated list of the same relatives they’re a list of different blood related people branched from the roots of our extremely large family tree there were literally thousands of us! There may be millions now with all of the possible children, grand, and great-grand children and so on.

It is so nice to communicate with our loved ones especially when we’re not even expecting it, they come at times to encourage, enlighten, acknowledge, inspire and protect.

I just had a dream the night before of one of my elder female relatives that came to give me a message of confirmation regarding how my aunt “Tina” Ernestine Lawrence was the one that originally initiated slander against my mother from the beginning years ago and how no one else within the family (on Catherine’s side of the family) had ever set out or even thought about doing anything of that nature as everyone of our other good relatives had nothing against my mother or any negative thoughts or intentions toward her we were just a normal regular family and it had made no sense. My mother knew that though, that it was all Tina from the get go and that other family had no part of that disgust. Tina was always an undesirable that was never well acquainted with the family she never even knew who most of the relatives were!

She was warm and completely honest in her connection with me as a reminder of how they all stick together (our unit) and how they’ll always have my back.

My elder relative just wanted me to know the truth in details-as they share with me so often concerning different circumstances and situations- out of love and benevolence because they are proud that I am naturally and genuinely carrying the torch for our family, a burning flame of authenticity and loyalty from through out the generations of those of us that are and that were innately set apart.

Second set of 1-40 of my relatives.

Second set of Census Records 41-80 of my relatives.

Third set of Census Records of 1-40 more of my relatives.

Third set of Census Records of 41-to 80 more of my family members.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kin Folk (My Lovely Family)

I love my mother’s side of the family people like them don’t come around so often. I am so proud of them, to be related to them, and that I am of them and that they are of me as we all have our own unique identities that also draws within us our connection.

Knowing where you come from is so very important and interesting. And as a person of the caul it has by nature been detrimental that I not interact with certain types of individuals and things as they are not of my specific essence.

All of my good relatives outweigh the very few that I partially grew up with within my home that had resulted from the union of my grandmother (Catherine) and grandfather (Willie Sr).

My mother’s mother Catherine came from an extremely large family that originated in Virginia. They were very tight and close-knit just the way a real family should be they were good people and would always keep in contact with her when she moved to New York. I remember how they would regularly call her on the phone.

Some of her relatives eventually moved up from Virginia to all places such as parts of New Jersey and other states and boroughs of New York as well.

Census Records
1-40 of the members of my family

When My mother was a little girl her and her siblings would go down south and visit their grandmother and grandfather (Catherine’s parents) on the farm that they owned and where they would produce and sell their very own goods/products. My mother had two aunts and four uncles altogether and all members of the family cooperated and played a significant part in making the family business a success.

My great grandmother (Catherine’s mother) use to make homemade soaps and foods and etc…I have other relatives that owned their own funeral home that was still doing business in the 1980’s I don’t know if some of them expanded or still have the same business running currently.

On the farm our family had lots of animals including dogs. They had cows that my mother would milk, horses, mules, pigs, chickens-one of the mules had kicked my young uncle in the head once.

My mother had a lot of fun down there and was shown and given much love just as she did with me. I always had love and security around me that contribute to the strong person that I am today my real family from Virginia all stuck together and there were and still are many of us.

Even though many have passed on they are definitely not forgotten and their being deceased makes them no less of relevant to me as opposed to those that are actually living. They continue to be here with me in spirit and one would be a fool to fuck with me with all of the ancestors that I have lingering around loving and protecting me and my loved ones.

Census Records
41-80 members also included in my family

As I have communicated with them and gotten to also know them on another level “home is truly where the heart is” and no one can break that bond. Our love is a house homed by our energy.

One day as time went by Catherine just didn’t have time for her family anymore as she was more preoccupied with hanging out with the neighborhood trash within the area we weren’t even suppose to be living in that area she was originally set to move into a corner two family home over in another part of queens. She didn’t want to know her family again until she got ill from having a stroke back in the early 1980’s.

How could she forget where she came from to go down to the lowest forms of disgust?

I could and would never be so inauthentic and disloyal to my nature to be turned around when tested by negativity.

Nevertheless, here and there runts do run through our family trees that is why it is so important to not intermix genetically with certain lines of individuals even though what may have been done before our time we to certain extents have no control over.

I found a census that dates back to 1940 recorded of eighty members of my family, there are so many more of them not listed, however, a cousin of mine that is on the list acknowledged how my grandparents had another house other than the one that my mother and her siblings use to visit a bigger and beautiful home that they shared when she’d visit. Wow, I just can’t get over how much family we have and my mother remembers a lot of them I even remember some!

 

 

Us Caulbearers Never Walk Alone

bosomYes, by nature I have always been a very strong individual mentally, emotionally, and even physically. I have also always been a loner yet I have never been and have never actually walked alone.

I have always been very well-liked by others and I was always able to make friends very easily yet never desired to associate with undesirables who became fond of me only those of my class or level would I choose to allow into my circle if I were amicable enough toward them or interested, however, I was never the type that wanted or needed to be around a crowd as I always found confidence and contentment within myself and within my surroundings no matter where I went.

I held my own ground and had preferred the solitary style of my own nature.

Those who I did become sociable with, depending on exactly who it was because different personalities can also bring about the innate variety that is within ourselves, we had stayed in touch but didn’t have to constantly make contact with one another, although, others do often tend to reach out more to me because they are attracted to my aura and find that they can communicate with me in many ways that they are unable to communicate within others in specific and because I am a fun person to be around but for the most part because I am genuine and unique.

I appreciate people who think ‘big’ and that are able to exchange significant and challenging ideas with me, individuals that are not afraid to climb that ‘higher ladder’ unto infinity, reaching that anomalous spectrum unbounded by restriction, those that have that natural drive and enthusiasm because I am not just a talker or a thinker but I am a doer, a person who makes and demands change.

Like I have said before, I’ve always had people who truly cared for me and that had looked out for me other than family and some who have even went out of their way for me because I was indeed worth it yet the majority of them who weren’t on the level never really knew me for the individual that I actually was as I was never one that was average or ordinary.

Just because people spend time hanging around our presence does not at all mean that they exactly know us all that well.

Insecure individuals as well as those lacking within particular knowledge would rather define us for who they want us to be instead of accepting us for who we authentically are as human beings personality that distinguishes character, ability and all.

Some if not most people in general take for granted and assume what others are like under certain circumstances due to their own limited view of perception and experience within the inner or outer scope of things.

Nothing counts more than self awareness and discovery, the realization of the reality that is around the very structure of one’s very own foundation and direct source of information.

First hand experience is the best hand to learn from, not only to undergo but to properly interpret what we come to know.

As children born of the caul or children that are very spiritually inclined and “in tune” with the universe around us we have a radar that is very well within and beyond the range of frequency, allowing our ‘spiritual antennas’ to receive and transmit energy to the highest and magnificent of degree.

Except for ourselves, other individuals looking at us from the outside cannot see what we are surrounded by around ourselves.

I’ll say it again, I have never been and have never walked alone even when I did not know it, my ancestors and spirit guides have always been there beside me watching over me and providing for me through fashions of arcane communication and relation.

I can recall so many accounts of occurrence, times when I was in the midst of danger and they had come to save my life and/or had prevented serious injury and harm from being done unto me.

One that I’ll end with, though, pertains to the night my dining room was filled with the presence of a large group of my deceased relatives (the place where I had kept one of my altars at the time) and the strong bond that was felt there between us all along with the love and the security. They were all there gathered together in my home all able to visit and to spend moments of vital family union. Only the good members of the brood were allowed to come through.

Later on that night, after they all had left, one of my other deceased relatives had arrived to an empty setting and I was able to see him clearly and a voice had said to me “That’s Uncle Lee”.

I had said to myself, “Oh maybe that’s just a made up reference”, because sometimes foreign entities will come through or those that I am not familiar with to say things that I can’t put together or that just have no purpose that I am not immediately cognizant of, however, this was no foreign spirit messaging me that night I later found out.

I happened to mention the incident to my mother, what I had heard, and the description of the apparition that I saw, and she acknowledged to me that the man’s name was indeed “Lee” (a name that I’ll use instead of his real name because I am very protective and respectful toward my ancestors and I don’t share certain things that are sacred between us), he was her uncle, her mother’s brother and that he would always arrive to gatherings late after everything was over and after everyone had already gone.

Everything that my mother had described to me about my great uncle from his physical demeanor down to his character traits in which I had visioned and had felt within him through my own sight had astonishingly coincided with what my mother had told me and I had never seen this man before and we had never discussed him.

One thing that I know is that I am so proud to have him as a part of the family along with the others who are around me and who all will never let me ever walk here on this earth alone or without their love, guidance and protection.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’m Forty-One Years Young Today!

 

 My horns are up and I’m ready to dig my heels deep into the dusts of the dirt to head off and take charge like a true bull in motion“. -latoya lawrence

Many people who come into contact with me usually think that I am younger than what I am when in actuality I am the one who is older than what they are.

And a few of these young and old ones alike find much of their self esteem heavily drenched in tones of foundation and excessive make-up thinking that they look good when in fact they do not, it is all inside of their heads, and then some people lying to them inspiring them to believe that they do indeed look good. It is funny and at the same time so sad to me.

I do not understand people of that nature because as I continue to get older I do not even care about my age and I don’t even focus on my looks because I am a natural beauty with a lot of confidence and ability who has never felt the need to artificially prolong my youth or the desire to cover myself up with the disgusting globs of any type of cosmetics.

For me it has consistently been about living pure and staying real, having peace and being happy and where there is a love and security from within there is a solid basis and an effervescence that will conclude from the essence that is without.

Spring and summer are my favorite type of year and season. I hate the winter and the fall. Not only do I love the spring but I was born in the spring.

It is very hard for me to believe the fact that I just turned forty-one considering the fact that I do not appear anything of such physically.

Mentally, though, I’ve always been and felt much older than within my ever present years.

In person, I still have that youthful and very attractive face-not saying that as one gets older that they are no longer pretty (some get even better with age some just get worse) but it is all in how one takes care of themselves along with the attribution of the genetic pool.

I still appear young and beautiful without even trying to be and I have the body that is both the combination of a little girl in between to a teenager and I love being naturally manufactured within that petite fashion.

My mother is an April Taurus and she had enjoyed her recent birthday we had spent the entire day out (she doesn’t look her age either).

birthdayAnd aside from the very few bits of trash-my late uncle, aunt, late great-grand mother and father’s side- that were unfortunately connected within the family we all age extremely well and have a great family lineage.

I am a May Taurus and what was so coincidental and harmonic was that one of my late pets “Brandie” was also a Taurus who had been born during the zodiacal structure of April as I had first gotten her six or seven weeks after her birth decades ago I had accurately calculated what her astrological sign was.

I long ago stopped celebrating my birthday at the age of twelve it became just another ordinary day to me.

I did not have to take a special day of the year to celebrate the significance of my being born when I could honor that event as a celebration of any time within my life.

And, also because I didn’t ask to come into a world that I did not at all agree with and also into a world that I had to share with other certain types of people who I had constantly hated and who I didn’t feel should have been given the breaths of life by being brought into any kind of existence to begin with (at least I was born with a gift to compensate for the inconvenience) yet it is another excuse to treat myself to some lovely extra self pampering around or on that specific day of the month when the moment does arrive if I occasionally get into that mood.

Happy Birthday Taurus:(https://ladylatoya.wordpress.com/2013/05/09/happy-birthday-taurus/)

What I Want For The Holidays:(https://misslatoya.wordpress.com/2015/12/19/what-i-want-for-the-holidays/)

The Perils Of Substance Abuse:(https://misslatoya.wordpress.com/2015/12/02/the-perils-of-substance-abuse/)

Blood, Money And Dirt:(https://misslatoya.wordpress.com/2015/12/04/blood-money-and-dirt/)

Into The New Year:(https://misslatoya.wordpress.com/2016/01/01/into-the-new-year/)

 

 

Innovative Style

magazine

Excerpt:

Live, love, laugh and be full of your own distinctive joy, an exhilaration that no one can steal or take away from you, and your abundant spirit.

Life itself is a deep experience and knowledge and understanding is a deep advancement, intangible stimulation that delivers a powerful elevation – truth in my own words because I am living proof of what “divinity” can reveal and accomplish.

Exhibiting authenticity within a world full of many fakes and cowards takes a fierce character, one that is combined with a natural strength and confidence that manifests within to then inevitably exude without.

A genuine soul can take on any challenge that arises with a cool ease and vile tenacity.

Upon reasonable circumstance an honest person will not back down from what they may believe in or stand up for.

Why fear to express oneself within thought and ideas especially when reflection and vision may not be so common or within the norm? A unique view and perspective suggests more valuable notability and change compared to the same useless repetitive unfruitful solutions that are bias and foreign to the vast array of distinct individuals. I could never be stuck within someone else’s rut! I am about productivity.- Preview Innovative Style,

“The occupational career section is coming soon”, the page that focuses on our job life and how we (those of us who it pertains to) successfully balance within the daily activities of our home place and social life and workplace life-naturally keeping those two or three circumstances separate because work should stay at work and home should stay at home-I never understood how some people bring work home with them because once I get home all of that occupational duty or whatever that may have went on there is completely forgotten about! All I want to do is to eat and relax, and then go sleep.

Extramundane

sweet momentNothing in life is definitely promised to any of us yet there are happenings that are meant to be (to come into fruition) and that will not or cannot be interceded within.

It can all be over for us within a split second, minute, hour, day, week, month and year, and so on. In spite of all that there is faith, and we build upon and receive faith through the continuous trust that is gathered upon us once loyalty has been shown to us through or by whatever means on a basis that is primarily consistent.

When we have complete trust within something because of it’s reliability then we know that we are able to depend on that in further period to come and within our most trying times of need. Now that does not at all indicate to take the circumstance for granted but to realize one is able to believe if an instance appears to seem impossible.

dearer momentI have always been loved and had love within and all around me, real love, not an imitation or what some may falsely perceive as love because love has to come natural it is not something that one can just turn off and on but it is an intense affection that can disappear at chance, and that is also a natural aspect and factor.

As I have been a very particular individual by nature I have never loved anyone easily certain people have been more prone to have a “fondness” for me compared to me of them but I genuinely do “like”, recognize and respect sincerely good people and I love what is personally within relation to and around me.

When some people are “without” or do not “have as much” (not all, just some or a lot of people, because everyone is unique) of that endearment they are apt to harbor resentment due to the fact that they have to go outside of their habitat in order to find the love that they lack through the acceptance of other people-even in the midst of strangers and that is all too sad.

Through having had love and encouragement there is a tremendous gain of strength and confidence and no one can ever take that self respect and security away and that principal cannot be substituted for within any other absolute fashion.

dear momentIt feels so good to feel “safe”, to have that “spiritual umbrella” hovering over to follow one throughout their every step along with the “universal shield of concurrent energy flow” structured into the day to day activity and environment.

There is nothing more comforting and settling to the mind and soul other than to know that one along with their additional loved one’s are being shown authentic natural affection and care in the wonderful forms of extramundane preservation.

 

Preservation: (https://ladylatoya.wordpress.com/2016/01/20/preservation/)

Into The New Year

holiday partyMy mother has never been a drunk or anything of the such she would drink some beer here and there and some champagne on occasion. I have fond cute memories of “once in a blue moon” when I was a little girl how my mother would pour me a petite glass of Lancer’s white wine that came in a medium size green bottle and we’d sit across the table from one another drinking out of the little fancy wine glasses chatting lovingly and talking about things going on in life.

My mother altogether cut out drinking she has not had any alcohol at all for a very long time now, over a little more than a decade in fact, and not even on occasion. However, this New Year she decided to buy a bottle of Moet a month ahead of time to open at midnight after the eve and as she did we sat and talked.

I’ve never been a drinker of any type of alcoholic beverage not even on particular events or instances so I didn’t share in this special one time occasion with her, I had already ate me a good meal and we had our specific delicious foods prepared also for the next day so all was nice and good.

My mother expressed to me how much she loved me last night and we discussed a lot of things just like we usually have and usually did but there was something important about last night. We even went over how our foes (the conspiring degenerates) tried to turn her against me in the past with their evil voodoo/black magic manipulation and vicious and obscene lie tactics.

She imparted how she would never “in reality” ever go against me for anyone.

We covered a lot of ground that is not necessary for me to reveal in detail through out this post but I’ve always said I’d be in jail if I had to continuously be around undesirables. I hated being within their company I hated being enveloped in a world occupied by them life just genuinely feels so “good” and “whole” when they are not anywhere around or to be found.

I’d be in jail for brutal and ruthless murder charges that is why I keep away from them because if they push me in the wrong direction I will not be responsible for any of my actions. My violence will indeed be justified. And I have always been and felt that way that is why as a little girl I use to constantly kick their asses when the moments called for it and I never lost a fight because I was in the right.

That fierce spiritual “energy” that harmoniously resides and burns inside of me cannot make any promises about inhibiting that automatic response.

Hey, in not so many words, we could have had certain family members “taken out” who had perpetuated much of this shit before it got out of hand decades ago if we wanted to, but most people cannot keep quiet about such things of that nature.  Specific kind of people may eventually talk or brag.

I on the other hand am not that way that is not the type of genes and “spirit” that I hold. I come from backbone where we will kill for one another and definitely keep quiet about it. It is even better now because I have my own “spiritual crew”, my blood related family on the other side and they do not risk capture and penalty they are judge, jury, and executioners and I love and respect them all dearly the females and the males. They see and know everything going on within and around me and have been and will continue on with taking care of business.

holiday dessertsI do not make New Years resolutions I never did once I decide to do something in general I just do it with no turning back if I am truly serious about it.

If there are New Years wishes though I’d wish for every beginning, middle and end, all year around, for all of the trash to disappear completely from the face of the earth forever. If all of the garbage were permanently removed the world would truly be a much better place to live, arrange, and enjoy.

The trash “kill” me in which how some of them actually think that they are supposed to be regarded and treated with so much respect. Those are the delusional ones that create a false illusion of their own estimated status or self worth.

The garbage has never been something to me, they aren’t shit, they weren’t born to be anything, and they never will become relevant within my domain and universe. They’ll never get any sincere respect or regard from me at all (my common courtesy should not be taken as a gesture of any esteem toward them) and respect or regard from them unto me absolutely would not hold any significance upon me.

I remember within the past when trash would surrender then try to “kiss my ass” I still did not want to even patronize them, I never liked the way that they looked, talked, behaved and thought.

When they endeavor to walk all over or to get over on one who is more superior to them (intellectual and/or character-wise) and then that person stands up for them self with logic and plausibility that is called and deemed as being disrespectful inside their twisted minds and eyes. I never gave any merit or put in any listening to their own state of “confusion” I refused to feed into that bull-crap.

 

In Response To: “What I Want For The Holidays!”

just chillin

 

diwakar
WordPress
When we last faith on people naturally we go for fine creatures like puppies which show their gratitude , faithfulness and love towards us.

 

 

misslatoya
misslatoya.wordpress.com
In reply to diwakar.Everything is not about losing faith within people. Some people in general do choose puppies/dogs over people do to being hurt, disappointed, or whatever their circumstances or situation may be but that has absolutely nothing to do with me and my case at all.

I had my very first puppy at the age of seven and I have always been attracted to them and have cared for them way more than I have cared for people and I had never ever been hurt or disappointed or lost faith within anybody (people turn me off with their ignorance), I by nature just had taken to certain puppies/dogs much better than I have with people and it is much more about and has much more to do about with their magnetism.

I never loved anyone easily I am not the type I am very particular because love has to come naturally and I have never within my forty years found too many people that I have felt that emotion for and I am proud of that because If somebody like me loves one that means that person has got to really be something.

I have genuine family within my life that have in the past as well as still up until now to this day that have shown me nothing but fierce and genuine gratitude, faithfulness and love yet I do not need that from anyone to thrive as I already have that within myself. I do not need any substitute through the animals.

 

What I Want For The Holidays!

napI stopped celebrating Christmas as well as my birthday when I was twelve years of age it was just another day to me just like the other holidays became to me and anyway the holidays aren’t the same as the way that they use to be years ago.

I do not need certain or specific days to celebrate an event any day can be a special day of significance to me “thanks giving”, “remembrance” and so on are for an everyday sentimental or pleasurable devotion.

I define my own holiday of celebrations and one of the perfect gifts for me during any season of the year is the four-legged furry canine companions.

I just love puppies and dogs they are one of the most beautiful things in the world I always had one or more of them growing up as a child and during adulthood and I just cannot wait until the day I eventually move into my brand new gorgeous lifetime home so that I can welcome in two or three of those adorable creatures.

I just can’t deny it, I enjoy them, want to kiss them, want to hug them, want to love them, want to play with them, want to talk to them, want to have fun with them!

My favorite of the bunch though is the German Shepherd/White Shepherd, Collie and Golden Retriever, the Bugles are cute too!

huskies

 

The Ultimate Respect

dessertEver since I was a little girl one thing I remember about my mother is how she would always talk to me and share. I would do the same in return. I am a person who loves to talk and indulge in conversation when I am in the mood for it.

One thing my mother had disclosed to me is how she never ever had sex while she was pregnant with me. And I believed her one hundred percent and I still do til this day in that regard.

She is telling the honest to goodness truth.

When she told me that I felt so honored and it showed me how much love and respect that I was given while developing inside of her womb/uterus.

Yes, we hear so many times from doctors and educators that while a woman is pregnant the baby is protected by the amniotic fluid in the uterus and the mucous plug located at the cervix as they serve as barriers against wandering sperm and the thrusting of a penis.

And I am clarifying my knowledge of that “what is considered fact” because any time one happens to disagree or form their own opinion to specific topics others are quick to define them as being uninformed or imparting misinformation.

In life, we are taught things whether it be in school or within other structures but all is learned through experience. If it were not for study and experience how would we know?

In general,  no one has the right to classify someone as being uneducated for having their own point of view regardless of after hearing what is suppose to be fact.
ice cream dessert“Oh, I don’t want to hear that shit!” my mother would say of the notion of sperm and jolting not affecting an unborn baby. And I would laugh because it was funny to me.

“I wasn’t going to let no man be bumping up against my baby’s head and letting semen go into my baby’s food supply. That is why a lot of these kids are born so lustful and crazy now”.

The same thing about the Shingles virus. It is said anybody who had varicella virus/chicken pox may eventually develop that nasty rash infection.

“Oh, I don’t want to hear that shit!” my mother would say in regards to the way one is able to contract the Shingles. “They just say that because they don’t want to make everybody feel bad who comes down with it”.

In other words she was saying Shingles is like an std and in reality it sort of is because it is a form of herpes but some do not believe that it can be sexually transmitted but I personally do know two or three people in the past who had contracted it that way through oral and/or AIDS related sex.

I have to admit without a doubt that I feel the same way about pregnancy.

I don’t care what anyone else does with their body that is their own choice and their own business, however, with me personally it would be out of the question.

I have no absolute desire for a man to touch me period as I am asexual but hypothetically speaking if I was a pregnant woman I would not want or allow a man to touch me!

A complete violation to the atmosphere of my child’s developmental environment and I am so glad that my mother had felt the same or similar way that I do about the situation before I was even born.

And for that, no matter what else may have been said or done through out the confusion of negative influences that may have affected my mother in the near past I give her so much credit and appreciation for having given me the most “Ultimate Respect”.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Yoruba Deities/Oshun

seasonalI love it when I am surrounded by the presence of my own personal Orishas who never cease to amaze or to disappoint me.

They are loyal and very sufficient along with my good ancestors.

As my Orishas take turns as the leads of my life and take turns working together within my worlds naturally directing and affecting/effecting chance and change in the favor and in the accordance with the universe they serve as extremely beneficial guides and protectors.

This is pumpkin season and what other better reason than to mention the beautiful “river goddess” Oshun.

Oshun and I go way back! I remember the first time I received her honey-colored beads.

https://misslatoya.wordpress.com/2012/06/24/the-rivers-run-deepswimming-in-the-life-of-luxury/

And I remember the first time I gave/offered her a cute little pumpkin along with some honey years ago. I buried it with a ritual and experienced some of Oshun’s fierce power as she invited and took me along on a comfortable and relaxing “spiritual float/travel”. She was so ecstatic because I gave her the pumpkin not to just get something in return but only truly from my heart and out of pure gratitude.

Oshun has shown and given me nothing but love, respect, insight, peace and safety.

And again this year she gets a cute little pumpkin out of the appreciation that she deserves!

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Veneration to you Oshun!

So Nice, I Just Had To Share/An Accurate Message

In metaphysical terms, Latoya, it sounds like you joined with your Higher Self. Power to you! From here on out stay the course and retain your inner purity. Dare to be different from those around you, permit yoursself to feel aloof of all wickedness around you, and befriend those who understand you, and love you for who you are.

Submitted by sentanaries on Wed, 06/12/2013 – 10:27.

file0001799398100Such a positive and well comprehended statement. Thank you. Love the encouragement. And of course, I will!

Submitted by LaToya on Wed, 06/12/2013 – 21:09.

This was a comment left to me regarding my personal post “Peace, Power, Purity, And Protection” that I had responded to.

It was so beautifully and accurately interpreted. I was always connected to my higher self, however, as I get older the association continues to grow even deeper. Allowing me to step into further heights of dimension at the levels that I am suppose to take at specific periods according to my nature and/or to the relevance of whatever circumstance that inspires to occur in particular.

When one is on a higher spiritual plane they are and do become intensely/extremely more and more unaffected by any negativity or nonsense that they are surrounded by (that is my experience, how I have always been).

I advise all and anyone who is able to relate to my commenter’s words to take them all as a vital source of genuine inspiration.

Peace, Power, Purity, And Protection

_fantail_1A while back as I was taking a nice hot shower a vision had appeared to me.

The vision regarded my present state then and now.

Three healthy white doves were rapidly flapping their wings straight above my head.

It was such a beautiful sight.

My peace and protection was gorgeously attached to me as I was graciously blessed by thee.

No one gave it to me and no one can take it away from me. The love, power, and guidance of my Orishas. The love, power, and guidance from my ancestors.

The purity of the mind, the purity that is within the spirit may it never be violated nor tarnished through any infiltration.  I will never yield to coerce. It is emphatically impossible.

The love and loyalty between all of us is far too strong for any mode of defilement to ever intervene.

When one is truly good in character or spirit (although none of us are perfect) they receive goodness in return. With blessings come responsibility. An obligation to one’s self to live in accordance to the most befitting and glorifying ways unto their own distinct nature and existence.

Acting out of character (whatever that may be/and however that may be defined) serves as a reproach to the very state of well-being.

Our experiences and realities verify who we are and where we stand. There are many sources of power and there are many sources of protection. Peace and purity starts from within and then exudes from without.

One has to find there own specific destination and road.

There is a distinct beauty that is within peace. Everyone does not have peace. Everyone cannot find peace. There is a distinct beauty that is within being pure. Everybody does not have purity. Everybody cannot maintain a purity.

There is a distinct energy that is within power. Everyone does not have power. Everyone is not able to generate power. There is a distinct energy that is within protection. Everybody does not have protection. Everybody is not able to handle a protection.

white-dove

Solitude

1416564_stairs_bergen_aan_zeeTime is precious. Before we know it our valuable moments quickly pass us by.

I cannot express enough how important it is to cherish the significant periods within our lifetime.

We will never get them back.

There are lots of wonderful memories to reminisce and to look back on. Times of love, times of bonding, times of epiphanies, times of change.

Yet there is the here and now.

As we grow older we look back to make examinations about the past and the present. Whether some of the experiences that we may have had were of a negative or of a positive nature-for those who are mature we’ve learned, we’ve grown, and we’ve maintained from them.

Now using our knowledge, strength, and confidence we are to partially serve to influence our futures.

Life is way too short to spend time being unhappy and wasting time on things that are not productive. Or wasting time being in predicaments and/or doing things that one does not really want to do.

Some people unfortunately have no other choice but there are alternatives that many can make even if it is just about making small minor adjustments that may lead to further opportunities toward chance.

I am at a place where I entertain contentment.

I have sacrificed by leaving certain situations to faith and I have reaped propitious reward. I have the time that I need all to myself.

Much time to be alone. Much time to not be bothered with the things that I cannot and will not tolerate.

I have solitude.

In my secluded areas there is absolutely no room for frivolity or negativity. I have time to think. Time to be.  Time for me. Time to enjoy the uninterrupted positively charged energies.

It is very unhealthy spiritually for me to be around specific types of people.

Just like our minds and bodies need care we also need to nurture our spirits. A sufficient amount of reclusiveness is the remedy for a many of conflicting spiritual ailments and disturbances.

A solitary being, isolated from the things in which is considered foreign to me. In my secluded areas, I live. I laugh. I write. I read. I enjoy music. I enjoy film. I have fun.

Even when I go out to trot about amongst the world I take into the pleasures that arise from the peace that only comes from within.

Everyone has their own method of rejuvenation and sustainment.

And even though we all are on this earth for a very short and temporary time-span before we make our particular transitions to the other sides of the realm there are still those stages that need to be determined, planned, and accomplished right between here.

My Inclusion Of Seclusion:

Just because I am alone does not make me lonely. Just because I have a sharp tongue does not make me angry.

When I speak the truth do not tell me that I am mean. When I speak my knowledge do not tell me that I am too judgmental.

Give me my place, a remote area where I can breathe. Give me my home, an area where I can bare all of my nakedness in.

Give me my own due solitude because everyone surely does not need or desire the company of others all of the time.-Miss LaToya

Hey Baby! I Love You!

Pretty White DogLast summer I stepped into a pet shop that is located not too far away from where I live.

From time to time I may enter into the store to observe all of the new puppies that are up for purchase and up for sale.

It is no secret that I am very fond of the German Shepherd breed.

On this particular visit that I had made upon last year was a very attractive white shepherd pup who inhabited one of the first cages that came into view.

The puppy was kind of big probably about six or seven months.

I went up to knock on the glass cage to get this beautiful puppy’s attention and did I catch an eye-full!

Although the young canine had been wrapped up in her own amusement at the back of the cage while taking sharp gnaws against the glass with the tips of the teeth I had been enough of an arousal to cause a distraction.

The puppy rushed to the front of the cage, now to come bite at the opposite side of the glass yet all alert puppy eyes were all on me!

I adoringly waved at the young canine. And the pup waved right back at me!

I turned to my mother and asked “Did you see that?”

“Yeah”, my mother had said nodding her head.

I then waved my hand two more times at the puppy and she waved right on back twice again by raising her left paw to rub up against the glass of the cage.

The shepherd breed never ceases to amaze me with their sharp wit and keen intellect.

This particular puppy had cost nine hundred dollars which was affordable for us at the time. The only reason I did not buy the puppy is because my landlord does not accept pets to reside at the apartment building where I currently live.

Sometimes it just seemed like pure torture.

I would think about the encounter between me and the pup and how much I would have enjoyed loving and raising the animal.

In due time that moment will come when I can afford a house or an apartment that allows these particular pets.

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Illumination: Self Love, Self Respect, Self Enlightenment

1235759-200I love myself dearly, madly. I always have, I always will. There is nothing that anyone can do to change that. Self love and self-worth is an esteem that comes from within. No one is able to give it, and no one is able to take it away when the regard is truly genuine.

I have never battled with or suffered from a low self-esteem which is a good thing.

However, not everybody is secure enough within themselves and they act out in particular ways as a result of their own feelings of discontentment.

There is a difference between depression, disgruntlement, or dissatisfaction over longing for a better circumstance and craving for something in which that someone does not have.

Life can be difficult and unfair at times especially at attaining the certain desires that one deserves, earns, and/or in retrieving the specific things that may have been stolen from one.

No one is in the exact same mood every single day.

There is happiness, sadness, indifference, ambivalence, anger, regret, guilt and so on. Whatever energy or emotion that may be negatively or positively plaguing any individual that is affected by a moment, an instance, and a change and also depending on a person’s own innate personality or character traits and flaws.

These mixtures of feelings are a natural part of life here on earth.

Yet not everybody takes the hopeless approach by giving up or giving in to despair. Many people have a very healthy and inspiring attitude toward a trial or during a challenge.

They are motivated to go forward. They learn then gain from their experience and they take that passion to use constructively.

Others on the other hand are not so optimistic; some are full of doubts or irrational fears. They lack the confidence and the initiative that it takes to become successful in whatever venture that they may choose and that they may want to undertake.

It is a fact though that many people do have shortcomings and will never be able to grow, evolve, or to measure up to the certain standards. These types of people are the exact same kind of individuals who will try to bring people of advantage down to their level, or lower below.

Low self-esteem to many is equal to a misery. And misery indeed does love to have company. The self loathing, self-hatred is so debilitating that it causes a vile and morbid jealousy. An extreme malignant stimulation to react in accordance to envious provokes.

It sounds so absurd to me, truly ridiculous, but there are low-grade people now in the current who are actually upset with me for not having been able to reduce my high self-esteem.

The specific things that they see within and without of me is something that many of them wish that they had.

My wonderful and natural attributes what they all resent me for.

If my personal disposition was a little kinder in regards to their state of existence then the hunger to see me fall and fail would not be so intense. Nevertheless, I have to be authentic.

I cannot and I will not put on any airs. I am real to the core and I refuse to let up on being true to the tides even if it is, or appears to be a bit harsh.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with recognizing or acknowledging one’s own ability and capability. We are supposed to take notice of our strengths and fiercely believe in ourselves. If we did not hold onto that faith we would not have accomplished half of the things that we have, and then continuously strive for more or to just maintain whatever it is that we already have.

Those who have a false or exaggerated opinion of their own self importance are just vain and pompous individuals with no depth or genuine purpose. There is usually no radiant talent behind what is merely done for show. One who needs to constantly “prove” or “parade” is just very insecure.

There is nothing more meaningful and fulfilling than when “spirit” places one into the forefront an instrument to draw out and play to those who are particularly “tuned in”.

When I was a little girl I was always very blunt and outspoken. I knew I was and would be a professional writer. I never in a million years thought though that I would be celestially inspired to shamelessly express information, messages, and creativity so openly through my literature.

It just goes to reveal that one never knows the adventurous turns that may be routed through out a dynamic spiritual journey or mission.

I truly enjoy what I do. I never get embarrassed or feel self conscious about any of my ventures. I just feel love, excitement and proudness for the beauty that has continued to blossom and surround me over my courageous years of exploration and development.

The confidence is innate, contagious. I spread it to those who I also love and who I am absolutely proud of.

There are some people who are so low in the opinions of themselves for no apparent reason. They just need someone who can see the glorious light that shines upon and within them. The passions that burn yet that is buried underneath the evils of blockages.

The smothers of darkness that proceed to hold one back from breathing out their striking forces of mind-blowing wind.

All that one really has to do is to ignore the blinders that opposition places over, and focus straight into true sight. There in that particular view reality will be seen. Shadows of obstruction or hindrance will began to fade to clear away all of the lies and smudges of deceit.

As soon as one rediscovers then accepts what is no longer hidden from the shades that had lurked, sheer brightness will sheen, glistening with new life, new direction, and a brand new clarification of a tremendous design.

And nothing and no one will ever be able to cloud this type of luminous visibility.

 

A Few Responses To My Mother And Daughter Relationship Post

1395713_baby_kisshttps://misslatoya.wordpress.com/2013/04/06/the-mother-and-daughter-relationship/

Tulan on Fri, 04/05/2013 – 18:18.

I was without a father, also, but I always longed for a dad. All my friends had dads and I missed having one, although my mother and I had a great relationship.I felt like I missed out.

LaToya on Fri, 04/05/2013 – 23:44.

Thanks for sharing your story. It is always nice to observe and hear another person’s personal perspective. I did know my father and I had met his family yet I felt absolutely no type of connection to them as they were not at all my class of people to want to be around. And I am glad that he was not in my life. I did not miss out on anything as far as he was concerned. I am very sure though that many females have loved having their fathers around. To each his or her own. Sorry that you did not get the chance to experience what you felt you missed out on.

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oreiro on April 07th, 2013 @ 03:51 pm

Very good. Very strong.
Like it.
and I can agree with you (Ihave got a doughter), but I am also divorced when she was 2yrs and tobe honest – girls need fathers.

It’s my opinion, you’ve got your own and that’s good. I don’t know you, but I see what you write here and I can say – you wrote absolutely true things – your Mum has done a good job in upbringing you and you will do the same with yours children!!!
….(but it doesn’t mean that doughters don’t need fathers…)

LaToyaLawrence on April 07th, 2013 @ 04:04 pm

I agree with you completely. There are daughters that do indeed need a father figure within their lives. We are all different. I have no disagreements with what you said.

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itdawn69 on April 07th, 2013 @ 04:34 pm

The bond between a mother and daughter is great. However, I have to say that a strong father figure in a daughter’s life makes a difference. I have seen little girls grow up with no father and find that they do not know what a good relationship between a man and woman looks like. How can she choose a good husband or boyfriend? This is my opinion but a child girl or boy needs to have two parents so that they can see how love grows and how men and women should inter act with each other. My daughter was raised with two parents and her views on relationships and even sex are different from her friends who did not have a two parent home. I am not saying a child can not develop and mature ok in a single parent home but it is hard for one person to be both mother and father to a child. Children do not come with manuals so we just have to work with what we have and hope that our children turn out good.

LaToyaLawrence on April 09th, 2013 @ 11:52 am

Like I said we are all indeed different. I have grown up with males and females. I know who my father was and I still do.

However, I did not ever have a need for him. And love comes naturally. There is no set standard within how a man and a woman love one another.

I personally was born Asexual so I never had any sexual attraction or desire for any man. And I am very proud of that.

If I ever had any children no father will be involved because that is my prerogative. What comes out of my body belongs to me. I would go to a sperm bank.

And society in my opinion is not a good example of the male and female roles as it is often bias. I am more into what is natural than as to what is generalized.

To me the union between a man and a woman is unnatural and undesirable. And that has absolutely nothing to do with me not growing up around a father figure.

There have been plenty of men who were interested in me who were shocked to see that I was not the average female.

I have an entirely different mentality and I always knew a whole lot about different types of men and people because I am very intelligent and I was born with a caul/veil (the gift of second-sight).

No one has ever been able to put anything over on me.

I knew things that women who regularly dealt with men did not know about them.

There have been fathers of other young females and uncles of other young females who have told me that they wish that their female relatives were like me because many of them were getting dogged out and messed over by men.

A father even told me that he wished he had of brought his daughter over to talk to me before he found out that she had went and got pregnant at the age of eighteen.

He informed that he would have made her get an abortion if his wife had not kept the pregnancy hidden from him to a more later time.

There are many stories that I can tell.

However, to each his or her own, but this is a huge world and society and I definitely know for a fact that particular females do not at all need any male influence within the home to be productive and knowledgeable within the certain areas of life. And I am very firm on that because I am living proof!

There are certain things that men just do not understand when it comes to a female-I’m speaking from personal experience.

Some females who are too emotional and insecure make it bad for other women who are just the opposite.

All women do not get sexually attached to men through sex. All women do not get hurt if men mess around with other women, some do not even care.

Words like bitch and whore are not offensive to me yet many women do get offended by those words and men think that they can hurt a woman by saying those things.

Many women are brainwashed by the male influence. I could go on but I do not need to write a novel.

People will and are going to think what they want to think.

I am just very glad that I am very open-minded and that I am not limited and do not let anyone persuade my judgement in life.

No one can tell me anything that contradicts what I have experienced and what I know through insight, wisdom, and perception.

Our Canine Companions

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Canines are indeed my only type of favorite pet to share a home with. From birth, and as they grow, many of them are so cute and cuddly, intelligent and inquisitive, loving and protective.

So fiercely loyal, canines make the best of friends aside from being extra added-on members to a family.

There is something very special and unique about puppies and dogs.

6812-1024x768-[DesktopNexus_com]They have an appeal that is irresistible to the avid admirer of the canine species.

I as a human being have always been enamored with their character and behavior.

285308-1024x768-White_German_shepherd_puppyOnce they pass that destructive stage of chewing and tearing up things around and inside of the house they develop and progress into their own distinct personalities along with their natural inherited traits.

6709-1024x768-[DesktopNexus_com]There are so many breed of canine to choose from depending on preference and temperament.

My breeds of choice are the German Shepherd, the Collie, and the Golden and Labrador Retrievers.

I love the fierceness and the intelligence within the shepherds.

The Collies and retrievers are also very bright and they have such a sweet, fine nature.

All puppies and dogs love to play and eat. Their sudden energy spouts may at times tire one out, however, in my opinion that spiritedness is what keeps the atmosphere within the home lively.

These animals bring a lot of life into the environment as they are so innately animated and energetic. They are exciting creatures to have around.

Canines have allure. They are mysterious, fun, sneaky, mischievous.

They have a particular charm and charisma about them. It is in their stance, their bark, in the wag of their tail, in the way that they snarl.

Canines are good for our overall wellness and state of mental health.

They bestow upon us therapeutic properties, physical as well as emotional. They do this through their auras.

They have the ability to help us relax. They give to us comfort while at the same time they manage to bring to us much great joy.

No devoted puppy or dog owner can deny the extreme love and attachment that can be acquired over the years between them and their pet.

The canine and human connection is exceptional. The relationship is a kind, considerate, demanding, and sometimes challenging one. And it is an association that the world should never be without.

 

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Proud To Be Asexual/The Liberating Truth About My Asexuality

1037736-200I was a very cute little girl growing up. And young males were always attracted to me. Always bothering me.

Whereas I found the behavior of the opposite sex quite annoying most females would have enjoyed the attention.

When I was coming up in the 1980’s many of the children living around me within my neighborhood were having sex at a very early age.

One of the youngest girls that I knew of at the time was about the age of eight. The boy whom she had had sexual relations with was at the age of either ten, or eleven.

They both lived on the same street that I was living on. Neither one of their parents were good examples of what a mother or father should have been.

Anything of a sexual nature was the last thing that had ever crossed into my mind. I was a very content child, enjoying my life, playing with my barbie dolls, and loving the puppy that I had.

I had a very good mother who took care of me and who had gave me her undivided love and attention. I never went out looking for love, affection, or attention. I did not have to. I was a very secure young person.

If I did lack the love and attention that every child should have, and that every child deserves from their parent. I definitely would not have searched for it by spreading my legs to any young or old man who had acquired to come along. That would have just been totally absurd in my opinion.

As I was getting older and reaching into my late teenage years I had still found the amorous behavior of the males to be annoying. All that I knew was that I was not at the least bit attracted or interested in any one of them and just wished that they would all go away and leave me alone.

I had known ever since the age of fifteen that I was asexual. And I was very proud and in no way ashamed. To me being asexual was just as normal and natural as breathing. I did not know anything else.

I did not have any desire to have intercourse with a guy. I did not even want to kiss one.

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There were people around me at the time who had never heard of the term “asexual”. When I’d tell certain people that I wasn’t interested in males they’d immediately speculate or assume that something negative had to have happened within my life.

That maybe I had experienced a bad relationship. Or had seen other people experience bad romantic relationships. Neither one of the conclusions that were drawn were anywhere near the truth.

Another huge misconception that certain people had about me was thinking that they could “change” or “repair” me. Repair what? There was nothing about me that was wrong or broken. If anything, I was very well put together, and perfect.

I could not understand why people would make such a big deal when it came to their romantic encounters, the attractions that they had for other people, and the way that they were just ready to jump into relationships with people that they had crushes on.

While many around me were coupled off I always remained happily single. I use to get so sick and tired of hearing what was going on with this one and that one’s boyfriend or girlfriend. I did not want to listen to that crap. I was not involved in all of that crazy and ridiculous drama. So why should I have gotten myself into the middle of it?

I could have cared less about who was cheating on who. And what so and so went an did, and why. I mean please, these people needed to get a real life. I know that I had one. A life that was not full of a bunch of ignorant nonsense.

As an asexual person myself I do not ,however, represent the attitudes that every or all asexuals have. I would never generalize anyone because we are all very different and have our own unique personalities, preferences, and views.

Nevertheless, us asexuals all do have a common trait. We lack a sexual interest and attraction to other people, regardless of what the sex is of the other person. Asexuality is not a form of lesbianism, homosexuality or bisexuality. Asexual means “without” sexuality.

I personally never understood why a woman would want to let a man stick his genitals up inside of her. It is the most undesirable and unnatural thing for me to process.

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I know that most heterosexual and sexually active people would consider my attitude and way of thinking to be strange and insane, especially since sexual intercourse was naturally designed for a man and a woman by their God.

Religion does not at all in any way play a part in my asexuality. In fact, I am into my Yoruban (African) ancestral and orisha worship-but that is another story.

My spirituality itself does innately support what and who I am though. My asexuality is one of the biggest parts of my identity. An identity that my spirituality and I embrace wholeheartedly. The foundation of my spirituality is based on truth, knowledge, love, and respect.

If one does not truly love, respect, and know them self there is no strength nor purpose deeply rooted within them.

I am liberated through my asexuality and my spirituality. The two most beautiful things about my life. I believe in self expression and honesty. In one being true, and true to one self.

Asexual people range in a wide variety because each individual has their own experience. And what some people consider and identify as being asexual also ranges widely.

Even though most asexuals do not seek out sexual relationships many of them are looking for companionship.

Intimacy is not always about intercourse. Some asexuals just want to have a close, loving, and sexless relationship that focuses on a romantic friendship. Doing everything that a girlfriend and boyfriend would do except have sex. Sharing one another’s interest. Having children together, and so on.

Some asexual people will have sexual intercourse with their/or a partner if they want to please them or if they want to have children. It all depends on the situation and circumstances.

There are some asexuals who claimed that they have had sexual interests and had been in sexual relationships at one time in their life.

Then you have the ones who are like me who have never had any sexual interest, feelings, or attraction for the opposite sex.

I did consider wanting to have a child at one time. During my teenage years I didn’t really want to have a baby in my adult years. However, I said if I did, I would go to a sperm bank if I could afford to-or I would just find a man who was interested in me and just use him for his sperm then I’d go about my business.

When I actually did become an adult I changed my mind about having children. I decided that I was ready and would attempt to conceive a child. Nevertheless, it did not work out as I had planned, and the outcome definitely turned out for the best.

I could not afford the sperm bank at that particular time in my life. And the males that were around me were not worth anything. They were not attractive mentally or physically. They were undesirable. So I definitely did not want or need a child running around here on this earth that would constantly remind me of anyone of them.

Now I am thirty seven years of age and again i’ve changed my mind. I absolutely do not want any children. I am very happy the way that I am. I did not need a child or two to make my life complete or anything that would refer to that category.

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The thought of children, having my own daughters, was a natural female desire. After all, when us female babies come into the world we’re already born with the billions of eggs that are supplied to us for reproduction purpose.

And that is also why we ovulate to prepare us for a possible conception. Then we bleed (get our menstrual cycles) to dispense of an unfertilized egg so we can again be ready to prepare for another possible pregnancy.

So there is no need for me to explain any of my reasons. For a woman to want to have a child is completely natural. Far more natural than so called copulation.

If I wanted to have a baby out of wedlock and without a man in the child’s life-that would have been my prerogative. And I have no apologies.

As an asexual human being living on the planet life for me is grand. I would not have my life arranged in any other way.

The only thing truly missing right now within my life is a couple of pets. I’ve always loved and had a puppy or dog living with me at one point or another. I am working on getting three puppies to share my home with for the future. And they will all be my three babies.

The Beautiful Skin That I Am In

I am a thinker, a challenger, a truth teller and seeker.

It is very good to observe, question, talk about, and evaluate the many things that are going on in the world and around us.

By nature, I was always the type to thoroughly analyze and investigate. I was never easily influenced by anyone or anything simply due to something being laid out as fact or generalized as standard/normal, because I was very strong willed and had a very strong competent mind of my own.

As a female, I have experienced ridiculous bias that was foreign to me growing up. It was foreign because I never knew that I was supposed to be restricted in certain areas as far as my gender was concerned.

Society likes to dictate how a woman should be, act, think, and feel when the only way that I truly know how to conduct myself is naturally. And that is the same way that I will always continue to do. My character and disposition contradicts the stereotypical role and definition of a female. And no one will ever be able to stop or change me.

I’ve heard the most absurd things from assholes, including low scale women. “She’s too hard for a girl”.

I never knew as a woman that I was supposed to be weak! I had never been that way in my childhood or teenage years and certainly not in my adulthood.

“When a man say is how it goes”.

I never knew that a man’s words spit out gold and authority especially when he is not speaking truth! I have never heeded or been affected by anybody’s opinions or scolding that did not appeal or apply to me and my philosophies, whether they were male or female.

I know and am well aware that there are jealous/envious sick-minded people, and people who will always go around telling and spreading silly and vicious lies on others. This type of behavior goes on everyday and everywhere.

A rumor that I had found very strange about me is the one about my skin or face. Ever since I was a very young girl I have always been pretty and very attractive. I’ve had good skin and a nice grade of hair. And none of that is really important; however, it contradicts what my enemies were trying to do.

From my comprehension I believe that they wanted to give me a complex or a low self esteem, just another one of society’s ploys to keep a young and bright woman down by attempting to make her feel insecure about herself.

The biggest mistake that those in particular made is generalizing me. I am my own individual. And instead of playing into the obnoxious mind games, I learned from the ignorance of others. They showed the knowledge and the common sense that they lack, and the insecurities that they themselves actually have.

I have never ever had a skin problem yet my enemies had worked a black magic spell years ago for me to “breakout” then have people taunt me with lies. These stupid rumors went on for years with these chosen few sick people. And I never understood it.

Till this day I still do not understand it. When I was a teenager they tried to put in my head through black magic that I looked hideous and I never fell for it.

Beauty is indeed in the eyes of the beholder but I’ve never been an ugly person. And not that it matters-a lot of other people considered me to be pretty too. I have my own eyes. I can see myself for who and what I really am. What an insult to think that I would have been dumb and weak minded enough to not know better. Such stupid asses!

Why are and were they so hung up on my looks? I know why. A lot of guys were attracted to me and could not have their way with me because I had too much self love and confidence. Another reason why is that so many women have allowed themselves to be dogged out by men due to their own battles with low self esteem.

Everybody has their own motives for why they are sick and malicious and do what they do.

It all stemmed from jealousy, but my enemies all went about it the wrong way. If I ever did come to develop a skin problem such as acne it definitely would have not affected my self confidence. Things like that do not faze or bother me.

The most beautiful girls have breakouts due to allergies, their menstrual cycles or hormones and it is no big deal. I know that my hormones act up sometimes during my period. It is natural. I had to learn that I was rare in my thoughts about this matter. I realized that many people do associate a blemish, bump, or spots on the face with low self esteem and I think that is so sad.

There are people with clear skin who are as ugly as hell and they want to crack on attractive people with minor shit that holds no significance.

Only a true fool would ever come to the conclusion that I would feel bad or insecure about myself over breaking out with something. I always had a pretty face and complexion. I love the way that I look. I like my naturally oily skin that keeps me looking young in appearance. I like my slim/thin figure. I like myself.

This garbage is no different than a woman being regarded as a bitch or a slut, two other words that do not faze or bother me. And I’ve seen women go crazy over being called a “bitch”.

One lady acted as if she wanted to kill me over calling her one. I didn’t even mean it in the way that the rest of the world uses it. To me it was more of a way of saying “you asshole”.

The bottom line is that the world is a sick place full of good, mediocre, and evil people. There will always be those who will come along to try to break people’s strengths, play on their weaknesses if they have any, and destroy their spirits.

And sometimes it happens more so when you are a woman. Society loves to prey on and beat down women by bashing their reputations and physicality, coercing them into buying into submission and repression for meanness, power, selfishness, and personal gain.

There are individuals who will fall for the games and those who will not. And there will be those who will get confused.

I keep my ears and eyes open. I take everything in then sort it all out. I enjoy my life and my discoveries. It is a blessing to not get caught up in all of the nonsense.

My Family/My Spiritual Connection/My Back Up

I never feel lonely. I have always been secure within myself and my surroundings. I am very grounded mentally and spiritually. I have all that I need to sustain me.

The Family Circle:

It irritates me when a relative does not get acknowledgement because they are dead. Does their being deceased make them any less of your family, no way, certainly not!

(I am mostly unlike any of the family-but if someone were to mention oh she favors so an so in some form or another-that is because they’ve never exactly seen or came into contact with family that I actually do share similarity with)

I have relatives that are still alive here on the earth (and some distant relatives as well) whom I absolutely do not care a thing for or, about! And I do not take after anyone of them at all either-thank my lucky stars.

My dear family members that I truly love and respect have for a long time been in their graves, but they definitely are not forgotten. I see a lot of them in myself. We were all genuinely of one another. And we still are in spirit. And that fact is so sentimentally beautiful to me.

We can pick our friends; however, we cannot pick the families that we are born into. Yet those as humans should continue to be very selective when they hold a particular standard in regards to mating.

I am asexual, so would not definitely make the mistake of mixing with an individual of a lesser value. I still intend on going to a sperm bank if I ever considered to have a child.

I deeply wish that I weren’t genetically related to certain members of my “so-called” family (especially my father and one of my dead great grandmothers-which was my mother’s father’s mother. They were the two biggest mistakes that were made during the mating process). I can’t even bare to call them relatives.

What hugely makes up for the misfortunes though-is that aside from whatever else was created through the “runts” of the family-there is a solid foundation. Overall, my original family tree is a class of strong, authentic, intelligent, dignified and gifted people individuals of pure integrity folks who are just like me who I love, and am proud of.

My ancestors and I have a very powerful bond that connects us together through my mediumship. Our strong relationship is built on genuine love and trust. They serve as my spirit guides along with other elements of the universe.

Our family circle is important to us as we are particular in which we surround. We hold each other near and dear forever and for always. We are tight knit and legit. And we never cease to quit.

I love who and where I come from because it is a part of what defines me. My lineage explains a lot of my spirituality, the gifts that I was born with, and the particular things that I am inclined to.

I am still my own unique individual with my own mind and beliefs. My family circle and I are all one in the same, with us all sprouting out from our very own distinct branches.

Even in their deaths they (my beloved ancestors) never left me. They remained around me as shields and resources, passing on to me the valuable assets of my birthrights.

Nothing and no one can ever violate our “family circle”.

My Spiritual Clan And Our Family Tree:

I have great love, protection, guidance and loyalty from my beloved ancestors and orishas. We are a complete spiritual team.

I call them “my spiritual clan (the orishas/loas and elemental universal forces) and our family tree (my ancestors/spirit guide energies)”.

They were always there for me. Leading me in my way and escorting me throughout my journey of exploration and discovery.

Things that I knew and perceived about life when I was a child were revealed, defined, and confirmed to me during the stages of my development.

By nature, there is an unwavering consistency of character and affect between my spiritual connection and I.

I am a person of my word. One who is able to be relied upon. And a person who does not fail to come through if I am genuine and/or knowledgeable about the situation.

These responses are automatic and intense. And not only toward one another but within ourselves as “dependability” and “productivity” are our own natural inherited traits and ability.

My spiritual clan and our family tree are completely aware of every and all inside and outside things that are associated with the happenings of this life and can concurrently manage through any type of barrier.

I have confidence in them and their wisdom. They have proved so much to me time and again, upholding everything together and sharing with me a lot of hidden knowledge.

The loas are powerful supernatural beings greatly differing in force yet not so foreign from us in attitude and reaction. They have dispositions that are very similar to humans.

My departed loved ones who lived as strong authentic yoruba priestesses in their day an age work harmoniously in accordance with the loas.

Other noble relatives of mine who weren’t involved in the priesthood serve their purpose through various means of devotion.

And all of them are highly venerated. I am just as devoted to them as they are to me. All of my good ancestors, and the specific loas that are attached to me, are the loves of my life.

My ancestors and orishas have always had my back in what seemed like the most chaotic of times. Nothing was ever too big or too small for them all to handle. And I was always important enough to gain their solicitous and undivided attention.

That is what is so fabulous about the universe. It has the ultimate power to simultaneously preserve any situation at any time with anyone and anything.

My spiritual clan and our family tree know more about what I am capable of-than I do myself. And the overwhelming love and faith that they have in me is priceless/ irreplaceable.

The spiritual connections that cling around me and the energies that surround us are my greatest motivators and inspirers.

Positivity/Positve Energy

I feel extreme goodness and happiness around me, a spiritual peace and tranquility with the signs and assurance of the positive things to come.

Since I was a young teen I’ve noticed how my environment truly made a difference in my quality of life. The negativity that I often encountered came from the negative vibes of “unsettled” people who I naturally did not care to be around or bothered with.

While they were trapped in their dilemmas my spirit sought to escape from the atmosphere of their dread and despair. I could not relate to them. They were not a part of my world, plans or dreams. Their habitat was no place for my vibrant spirit to absorb energy from.

I could never stand to breath in places that stank with hideous odors. I loved to breath in the fresh and clean airs of fragrances that were pleasurable and refreshing to my senses.

I walk alone in a path that generates luck, love, life and laughter, a solitary path that brings in the beings (and blessings) that are the most suitable, vital and appealing for my spirit to connect with.

As an individual who always entered into things wisely, continuously learning and observing the conflict within those who endeavored to cause “static” (interference, obstruction, negativity,) through their own ignorance and insecurity, I can attest to one thing for sure.

They do and will-without a doubt-“get theirs”.

Everyone who ever attacked or attempted to attack me in return had to suffer. Something negative ended up happening to them and I would know why even if they could not see it for themselves. Some people do not realize that they are wrong in the things that they say and do as they are blinded by their own sicknesses.

And I do not speak these words out of resentment or vendetta. I speak these words out of pure satisfaction in the positivity, in the guarantee that positive energy prevails and will continue to serve out its purpose as well as cause destruction.

Positivity will execute the negativity that gets in the way. I have not once experienced the pains and hurts that enemies intended to place upon me due to my “positive energy” (nature, level, way of thinking, character of being, strong spirit).

Their negativity is absolute nonsense to me, a “nonsense” that the energies that surround me automatically boomerang back, straight out into the universe right back unto them.

This is spiritual, a vindication not done by me but on my behalf and a little deeper than what goes around comes around, more of a justification that administers a severe lesson to be learned to those in particular who need to be taught.

I’ve watched in delight now and over the years, with no remorse, in the supernatural affects of the universe. The powers that are that afflict those who surely deserve it.

So I do not fret when enemies trespass against me because I know that they are just setting themselves up for an instant or future downfall within one way or another. These fools should know better than to mess with a spiritual person.

The positivity and positive energy from my love and light gives me a warm home to live in, water to wash up in, food to eat. Clean clothes to wear, a comfortable bed to sleep in. Entertainment to keep me occupied. A brain to function with and all of the other essentials required to live a quality and healthy life the things that really count and matter. And that is a great part of absolute success.

My Ambition

I am and have always been very ambitious. I have an uncontrollable fire that burns intensely inside of me.

I am full of reasonable optimism but far from naive. I do believe that anything is “possible” and nobody knows that better than me as I have experienced the “incredible”.

When you have true faith and are open to new ideas and unconventionality there is no limit to what one can achieve. And as a spiritual person with experience and perseverance I can attest to that.

My bubbly nature (high-spirited attitude) has allowed me to approach life with excitement. A great enthusiasm to conquer whatever may stand in my way, to challenge myself, to discover and explore, to expand and create, to be all that I can be and accomplish.

I love powerful “momentous” things that provoke change and stimulate improvement. I like to analyze and exchange ideas/perspectives, and thoroughly evaluate circumstances.

I am in connection with the universe and just have that continuous zest.

My spiritual nature undoubtedly accounts for most of my inspiration and motivation as “energy” is a positive generator of productive activity.

Sometimes our spirit leads us into opportunities and destinations before we ourselves become fully aware of what we are suppose to do or where we are suppose to go (and be).

The most vital things in life are to love and respect yourself, to be true to yourself. To believe in yourself and to not sell yourself short by not at least endeavoring to make the great efforts of attaining a well deserved and fulfilling goal.