Cozy Night At Home Enjoying A Classic

We have such a peaceful home and a nice, quiet life.

Last night at 8pm my mother and I watched the 1976 Stephen King classic thriller “Carrie” on Showtime.

We hadn’t seen the film in a while (even though we’ve seen it numerous times in the distant past through out the years) and we both reflected on the movie and agreed that it was such a great film. They just don’t make genuine quality horror films like that anymore.

Race With The Devil” was another great 1975 classic horror movie and one that was underrated, it is also an all time favorite of mine.

My mother and I were always fierce hanging partners. When I was a little girl she use to take me to the movie theater to see just about everything I wanted to see. We have a great relationship and still enjoy our entertainment together.

Months back on HBO we watched the last installment of Halloween (2018) with Jamie Lee Curtis who had made her return. It was a very good horror flick, not corny at all!

Mother, And I

My mother and I went out and had a wonderful time today as we always enjoy one another’s company.

We don’t allow outside influence to interfere within our contentment we have no tolerance for anyone’s negativity.

No one can turn us against each other under no circumstance. I am her daughter, she is my mother, what kind of obnoxious and outrageous shit is that?

Those who have no bond of loyalty and love between a relative, or relatives, hate to see others experience the joy and beauty of authentic unity.

We have a pleasant life, we have great peace of mind, and we are truly happy inside, especially not having any undesirable people around us.

We only accept those flying on an exceptional vibe, full of positive energy, and no bullshit!

 

Jealousy

On one of my blogs titled Working Woman, I’ve talked a bit about my mother, and the good relationship we’ve had during my childhood on up.

Ignorant adversaries, however, seem to constantly assume for some reason that if they intervene it would cause some type of uproar or inconvenience within my life.

My mother is not and has never been some crutch or resource that I need to lean on or to survive by.

I don’t understand why these idiotic degenerates continue to attempt to play on her mind through black magic. Since she’s had a history of having a breakdown they prey on what they consider her vulnerability.

The other night, I heard, as I am Clairaudient, the discussion of inciting conflict between my mother and I. Adversaries from time to time want to use her, and speak through her, in order to get to me psychology with bullshit.

These utterances are to actually come from her mouth while they manipulate her mind and emotions, and I am supposed to succumb to the ploy.

My mother does have some personal issues yet I have absolutely no attachment to that whatsoever.

When a person is sick or gets sick they are not in their original mindset, not their usual self, or thinking within their general pattern.

The circumstance has no bearing on my life, just because we have had good memories, and experiences together, doesn’t mean it’s dependent upon my present or future happiness.

Plenty of children and parents have fond recollections and get along. It doesn’t mean we are unable to separate one from the other. If discord was to arise it’s logical to move on with living a healthy life, and at a distance if necessary, all depending on the state of the relationship.

The situation is definitely not normal and I don’t understand our adversaries distorted perception of the relationship between my mother and I and how they assume it would affect my life.

Nevertheless, trying to play on one’s mental illness to perpetuate delusion is expressing the deep mental illness in which they most definitely possess themselves.

It’s all a waste of time and energy as I am ahead and unfazed.

It is really insane how they pathetically and absurdly keep this nonsense going periodically, and this very morbid attachment in which they have to me and my life that they refuse to let go of.

Well, they can sadly hang on by themselves.

 

 

A “Lady” Is Not “Truly” Defined By Her Sexual History

Working Woman By Miss LaToya

In my opinion, sexual intercourse is a stupid act as I consider a man and his penis totally undesirable.

Nevertheless, I am a very intelligent and logical open-minded woman who knows there are a lot of females who are interested in men and sex, or who may just use men for sex whether they want to have a child or they may just want to get their kicks off.

I can still elaborate common sense to a subject in which makes no sense.

I don’t care what anyone does with their lives or with their bodies as it is of no concern to me, in spite of that fact, as a societal issue and as a woman/lady myself I am inspired to express on this subject.

I’m not at all saying that attitudes will ever change, but that I, and I am quite sure many others, absolutely do not…

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My Words Of Truth And Encouragement To Those Who Are “Rare” In This Day And Age

 

One doesn’t have to be born with a “Caul/Veil” to be “different” and to be remarkably set apart from others.

There are a very small number of people out there in comparison to the large amount of inhabitants within society who have exceptional or rare quality and train of thought.

Wisdom doesn’t come with age for everybody.

There are plenty of narrow-minded people who go through life and who have went through life actually believing that, they know, and knew, everything that there is to know when they acquired nothing legitimate at all but what they have misconstrued or exaggerated through their own restricted boundaries.

And these same people teach their own children and others their same dumb ways and beliefs. Fortunately there are some children who are born and that come out smarter than their parents.

One should definitely not permit oneself to be defined by other people’s ignorance, misconceptions, and generalizations as most who are of an ordinary mindset have a limited range of view and comprehension.

This world is full of weak-minded individuals who are easily influenced. I’ve always been a leader, not a follower.

These individuals are only able to discern within the scope in which their minds will completely allow.

When other people may accuse those of us who are on a particular wavelength and who are at an advanced level of consciousness, mentality, and intellect, of not being logical, realistic, or even moral, it is because they are lacking within specific true knowledge as their minds have in addition been socially and spiritually conditioned to incorporate and accept the mental, emotional, and psychological degrees of rationalization among the majority in who it typically pertains and applies to.

It is very important to remain strong and to not lose one’s self and one’s own distinct identity and genuine nature due to the false conceptions of what others may interpret within our behaviors and expressions because most people are unlike us and don’t know anything other than what they are familiar with and have been accustomed to.

A lot of people put their own insecurities on us all of the time because it makes them feel better as they don’t want to be alone (set apart) within their own tendencies, personal flaws, shortcomings, or inadequacies.

Some people don’t want to willingly acknowledge a rarity or major uniqueness in certain others if they themselves don’t also hold and encounter those uncommon attributes. And some just trifle to tick us off.

Instead of just recognizing how there are other individuals who are “beyond their own capacities to understand” they, nevertheless, proceed to judge us by the ways in which they personally are, how they personally feel, and the innate or orthodox reasoning in which they are able to grasp within themselves upon occurrence, situation, and circumstance.

Their doubts or opposing reactions, if any, is purely a reflection of themselves and their own insecurity and lack of particular knowledge and/or experience.

Everyone, of course, is not and does not act out of these natures, however, for those of them who are, and who do act out, they need to be dismissed from our essence and presence.

It is never appropriate to let anyone make one feel confused or uncertain about who they are, the things they know, and where they stand.

I’ve been one who has always had a strong sense of self in which no one could deter and I am extremely firm within my beliefs and within my facts and I will stand up to anyone who dares to challenge my truths and experience whether it be the mundane or extraordinary.

I as an individual never cared what anyone said or thought about me. I am authentic within self and nobody knows me better than I do, and I don’t have to explain myself to anybody, and I have no apologies. –latoya lawrence

Natural

Ever since I was a young child I knew that if there was something that I didn’t want within my life then the situation was not going to work out.

Only the things that I preferred and under the circumstances in which I truly desired would instances turn out favorably and long lasting to my concordance.

I was never the type of female that ever hoped to one day get married and have children. I didn’t initially yearn to be a mother, when the idea later on within young adulthood came into mind to have a child it was with the intention of being a single parent, yet I eventually changed my mind about having a baby altogether and it was the right choice for me.

If I did have a child though it definitely would have been on my own without a man involved in the picture.

I fortunately grew up in a home without my father present and that is the way I liked it as I grew up strong, confident, independent and liberated-not implying that females that are raised in homes with their father’s can’t turn out that way-it was just an advantage that served a great purpose for me.

When I was little I never wished for or thought about having a dad around and when I saw other children that parents were married or together as a couple it was a situation that I didn’t require to be in I was very content and accustomed to my family order with me and my mom.

I wasn’t alone either there were other kids like me whose mothers raised them without a father it was normal to us. I can’t speak on how they actually felt about the matter, however, everything suited me just fine.

My mother never had any problems out of me I was a good child.

One thing I hated though was when guys were attracted to me or interested in me whether their intentions were good or bad I didn’t care, I wasn’t flattered by any of the attention I was genuinely turned off by it.

And it feels so good that I don’t have to go through undesirable and unsavory individuals who use to send to me the annoying invasions of mind transference through voodoo/black magic.

They had been doing it within many ways for many years within different techniques but with the same motives and that was to bring me down to their level. Whether it was to attempt to lower my self esteem or to get me to have feelings for a man they worked hard at it and failed miserably.

These people were jealous and resentful because I’d never been hurt or dogged out by a man as so many of them had even the guys were envious and jealous of me they all figured if I was in the same predicament as they were I couldn’t or wouldn’t think that I was better than any of them.

They were also jealous and envious of my intelligence and knowledge and where I could go within life if and when the opportunity arose.

They had such a warped sense of mindset that didn’t correspond with mine in the least if they had succeeded in their designs I’d still be the person who I am today with the same mentality no man could ever break me or kill my spirit. I wasn’t built within that fashion.

If I were interested in men I’d be able to get a good man and would only deal with one that was on my level, however, I’m proudly asexual and am fulfilled and complete as a woman and an individual.

 

Every Day Is Mother’s Day And Thanks Giving

Mother’s Day And Thanksgiving

They’re celebrated once a year on specific days yet isn’t every day a day to be thankful for something and to appreciate a good mom?

Of, course, so!

A mother’s love is priceless and cannot ever be replaced. A real mother should be celebrated everyday and within every way that is appropriate to one’s own meaningful  demonstrative expression.

One doesn’t have to actually give birth to become a mother, either, just because a woman has a baby does not automatically qualify or certify her as a genuine or capable parent.

Its about what is in the heart and mind of a person as well as their intentions and deed.

There are some that choose to adopt children which do or that do not have any biological connection to them or within their families, there are also some that take on the role of caregiver, bestowing solicitous attention to others whether personally or on a professional level.

And don’t forget many of us that are pet parents! We raise, nurture, protect, teach and adore our canines as well, the instance and position is a legitimate one.

There is so much to be grateful, thankful, or mindful of all the time even if it’s just something minor.

So to me, gratitude is a constant everlasting event to be observed and celebrated with the things and the people that truly count.

Loner

There are people who wanted to come into my life and be around me but I didn’t want to be bothered with them at all. I was civil, however, I didn’t want to be their friend or to maintain any connection to them.

Some people I just don’t like and I don’t have the patience or tolerance to make allowances.

Those that I’m compatible with intellectually and/or personality wise who I easily get along with and have great communication and rapport with keep in contact and then we go our separate ways.

I prefer intervals rather than to constant association periodic encounters suit me just fine.

I deal with and come into contact with many people through work and local travel yet I have no desire to develop a personal relationship with anyone.

I love being a loner it brings to me satisfaction.

I don’t need to be among a crowd of others to have fun or to have a really good time. I don’t need to lean on others for advice or support.

I’ve always been this way and this mode of life has been fulfilling to me under my circumstances as an individual with preternatural nature and unconventional outlooks.

To each his or her own and I’m certainly doing my own terms within my own way.

Go Figure

When the past comes to reflect without intent there are messages to take notice of that hint to certain information relevant to the present.

As I look at my present where what shines on me are those who share the brightness of my light.

When I look back at the darkness where there are the undesirables that came to surround me to hover and to create a permanent shadow.

In the distant past:

A female named Cherilyn Festus I had met when I was about ten she was fifteen and had moved on my block. Already Cherilyn had a reputation for sucking penis. Her nickname was “Head Hunter”.

Cherilyn’s breath smelled real bad even when she returned back to the neighborhood years later to shack up with a Jamaican guy on the block who’d constantly disrespect her and who she financially supported with the money she’d gotten through financial aid and an inheritance, I think.

Her so-called friends would use her and take advantage of her for her credit card and the little bit of money that she had.

She was supposed to be going to school to become an accountant instead she ended up with no job, no home, and a african man who she shacked up with in order to keep him in the country before he dumped her whoring bummy ass.

(The Jamaican guy before the African had been cheating on Cherilyn the entire time they were together and had a child just as old as the relationship between them that she didn’t know about and moved the mother of the children into his home not too long after Cherilyn moved out).

The recent past:

A lady that I worked with four years ago that actually was a client of mine as she suffered from depression went by the name of Rose.

Rose was the exact same age as me at the time which was forty-one. She had a twenty-one year old daughter, an eighteen year old son, an eighteen month old daughter, and a newborn daughter that was a week old.

The ex husband of her first two children came by the house where she lived asking her for money to support his new wife or girlfriend with.

Rose’s present husband had disrespected her and her oldest daughter in front of me more than once and acknowledged while I was there that her and her daughter both love babies and sex.

This husband of Rose’s had a woman on the side who was the aunt of her oldest daughter’s boyfriend’s ex girlfriend who’d both the husband and the boyfriend would visit together.

Oh, and I forgot to mention that her daughter was six or seven months pregnant.

The husband told me himself directly in front of her that he wanted the one year old child that they shared together but that he didn’t want the newborn.

“So you don’t love her?” Rose had asked.

There was a lot more going on and to this story as the couple constantly fought, too much to write about, and how she was being used and taken advantage of by her own stupidity.

What I had gotten was a close up view of looking through the unfortunate lives of these others that believe it or not thought their shit didn’t stink.

Yet people like me who’d never ended up in situations like these and more, and would never think to as that lifestyle and way of mentality was never in the cards, are discarded as the ones to look down on just because we never got fucked up.

 

 

 

 

 

Mother’s Day/My Birthday

My birthday fell on Mother’s day this year as I turned forty-three last Sunday and I spent the day at the movies with my mother since she planned earlier within that week for us to go see the thriller “Breaking In” starring Gabrielle Union.

The film was of very good quality with plenty of action, fantastic movie!

 

Kin Folk (My Lovely Family)

I love my mother’s side of the family people like them don’t come around so often. I am so proud of them, to be related to them, and that I am of them and that they are of me as we all have our own unique identities that also draws within us our connection.

Knowing where you come from is so very important and interesting. And as a person of the caul it has by nature been detrimental that I not interact with certain types of individuals and things as they are not of my specific essence.

All of my good relatives outweigh the very few that I partially grew up with within my home that had resulted from the union of my grandmother (Catherine) and grandfather (Willie Sr).

My mother’s mother Catherine came from an extremely large family that originated in Virginia. They were very tight and close-knit just the way a real family should be they were good people and would always keep in contact with her when she moved to New York. I remember how they would regularly call her on the phone.

Some of her relatives eventually moved up from Virginia to all places such as parts of New Jersey and other states and boroughs of New York as well.

Census Records
1-40 of the members of my family

When My mother was a little girl her and her siblings would go down south and visit their grandmother and grandfather (Catherine’s parents) on the farm that they owned and where they would produce and sell their very own goods/products. My mother had two aunts and four uncles altogether and all members of the family cooperated and played a significant part in making the family business a success.

My great grandmother (Catherine’s mother) use to make homemade soaps and foods and etc…I have other relatives that owned their own funeral home that was still doing business in the 1980’s I don’t know if some of them expanded or still have the same business running currently.

On the farm our family had lots of animals including dogs. They had cows that my mother would milk, horses, mules, pigs, chickens-one of the mules had kicked my young uncle in the head once.

My mother had a lot of fun down there and was shown and given much love just as she did with me. I always had love and security around me that contribute to the strong person that I am today my real family from Virginia all stuck together and there were and still are many of us.

Even though many have passed on they are definitely not forgotten and their being deceased makes them no less of relevant to me as opposed to those that are actually living. They continue to be here with me in spirit and one would be a fool to fuck with me with all of the ancestors that I have lingering around loving and protecting me and my loved ones.

Census Records
41-80 members also included in my family

As I have communicated with them and gotten to also know them on another level “home is truly where the heart is” and no one can break that bond. Our love is a house homed by our energy.

One day as time went by Catherine just didn’t have time for her family anymore as she was more preoccupied with hanging out with the neighborhood trash within the area we weren’t even suppose to be living in that area she was originally set to move into a corner two family home over in another part of queens. She didn’t want to know her family again until she got ill from having a stroke back in the early 1980’s.

How could she forget where she came from to go down to the lowest forms of disgust?

I could and would never be so inauthentic and disloyal to my nature to be turned around when tested by negativity.

Nevertheless, here and there runts do run through our family trees that is why it is so important to not intermix genetically with certain lines of individuals even though what may have been done before our time we to certain extents have no control over.

I found a census that dates back to 1940 recorded of eighty members of my family, there are so many more of them not listed, however, a cousin of mine that is on the list acknowledged how my grandparents had another house other than the one that my mother and her siblings use to visit a bigger and beautiful home that they shared when she’d visit. Wow, I just can’t get over how much family we have and my mother remembers a lot of them I even remember some!

 

 

To Elude The Truth?

felineIsn’t it something when sick people who are extremely jealous and envious of us try to relentlessly stop us within life then attempt to blames us when or if difficulty occurs knowing all along that they were behind the sabotage to begin with?

As they deliberately try to cause damage for us through their duplicitous methods of intervention whether by lies and/or manipulation of circumstance they actually believe that we ourselves are suppose to be the scapegoat?

It was often so strange to me how these type of people considered themselves to be clever within their ominous ventures as their undertakings have always appeared and proved to be rather transparent within the keenly focused mind’s eye especially when the subject of their scheme was well aware of their own obvious talents and skill and logical reasoning of natural probability for success.

The red flag is automatically raised when particular essence according to bestowal does not properly go into fruition, so who is the genuine culpable fool?

Eleggua

coconutsI stay close to Elegba as we have a special bond that no one can break, he is one of my African soldiers, the chief among the others yet all of them maintaining their high roles, whether it is my Goddess Oshun, right hand man Ogun, grandfather Orunmila or backup man Ochosi.

I love Elegba, he is and has been so good to me, and it is unbelievable.

Never have I been able to trust so loyally within a divine spirit to do right by me than he and my other specific Orishas that reside within and around my life and upon the universe, not to mention all of the truth , guidance,  love and respect that they have all expressed to me.

I am still amazed whenever Elegba occasionally shows and let’s me know when his powerful spirit is surrounding me by giving me signs, whether he turned on the light bulb that was screwed into a fixture of my old house that wasn’t at all functioning to turning on the television set of my current home after I had turned it off among other astonishing yet plausible things.

I remember when Ogun use to unlock the lock to the front door of my old home on occasion a few days shortly after I’d correspond to him within ritual.

There are many genuine tales of testimony that I could share on behalf of the congenial relations between my Orishas and I along with my beautiful and loving ancestors.

I feel so honored to have been born into the lineage that naturally incorporated these special Deities into my life, where would I have been without the necessary properties of the caul that imparted me with the ability of extra sensory perception to acknowledge and to communicate with those intangible beings, vibrations, energies and forces that have been looking out for and watching over me long before I had even come to know about it?

They all had been with me since I was a baby, especially my ancestors.

coconut-and-spiceWhere would I be without their direction and protection aside from the nature of my very own birthright?

I just cannot believe how they have not failed me, they are so real, so sincere, they are so within accordance and within correlation to the individual that I am and within vibration and within our connections within the universe.

 

 

 

Lovely Mementos

It is nice to look back and reminisce from the old days.

For the most part I come from a high class family with the exception of my father’s side. A few bad apples don’t spoil the whole entire family of generations and I am very proud of my lineage of strong and independent women and strong hardworking men yet I wasn’t able to post my grandmother’s large size fabulous family of relatives from Virginia so for now I’ll just post some of the beautiful memories of my grandfather’s before a few of the bad apples (his mother, his son when he got older, and his other daughter that I didn’t bother to post) became rotten.

LaToyaBrandieMe and my dog Brandie when we were both still babies she was such a cute pup!

My Mamma when she was pregnant with me she was so adorable

My Mamma when she was pregnant with me she was so adorable

AmandaFamily 2My great-grandmother holding my mother when she was a baby and my great-grandmother holding my mother and her brother when they were still baby youngsters..

Grandfather 2My grandfather and his dog when they were both still babies.

 

Sabette 1Sabette 2My great-aunt when she was young and old (My great grandmother’s sister).

Sabette 3

My grandmother, grandfather, mother, uncle and family.Family 1

My mother and her brother.Family 3

My grandfather with a colleague in the army.Grandfather 1

My great-grandmother and her sister (They actually come from a family of nine brothers and sisters).Amanda and Sabette

And my aunt Charise.Charise 1Charise 2

Us Caulbearers Never Walk Alone

bosomYes, by nature I have always been a very strong individual mentally, emotionally, and even physically. I have also always been a loner yet I have never been and have never actually walked alone.

I have always been very well-liked by others and I was always able to make friends very easily yet never desired to associate with undesirables who became fond of me only those of my class or level would I choose to allow into my circle if I were amicable enough toward them or interested, however, I was never the type that wanted or needed to be around a crowd as I always found confidence and contentment within myself and within my surroundings no matter where I went.

I held my own ground and had preferred the solitary style of my own nature.

Those who I did become sociable with, depending on exactly who it was because different personalities can also bring about the innate variety that is within ourselves, we had stayed in touch but didn’t have to constantly make contact with one another, although, others do often tend to reach out more to me because they are attracted to my aura and find that they can communicate with me in many ways that they are unable to communicate within others in specific and because I am a fun person to be around but for the most part because I am genuine and unique.

I appreciate people who think ‘big’ and that are able to exchange significant and challenging ideas with me, individuals that are not afraid to climb that ‘higher ladder’ unto infinity, reaching that anomalous spectrum unbounded by restriction, those that have that natural drive and enthusiasm because I am not just a talker or a thinker but I am a doer, a person who makes and demands change.

Like I have said before, I’ve always had people who truly cared for me and that had looked out for me other than family and some who have even went out of their way for me because I was indeed worth it yet the majority of them who weren’t on the level never really knew me for the individual that I actually was as I was never one that was average or ordinary.

Just because people spend time hanging around our presence does not at all mean that they exactly know us all that well.

Insecure individuals as well as those lacking within particular knowledge would rather define us for who they want us to be instead of accepting us for who we authentically are as human beings personality that distinguishes character, ability and all.

Some if not most people in general take for granted and assume what others are like under certain circumstances due to their own limited view of perception and experience within the inner or outer scope of things.

Nothing counts more than self awareness and discovery, the realization of the reality that is around the very structure of one’s very own foundation and direct source of information.

First hand experience is the best hand to learn from, not only to undergo but to properly interpret what we come to know.

As children born of the caul or children that are very spiritually inclined and “in tune” with the universe around us we have a radar that is very well within and beyond the range of frequency, allowing our ‘spiritual antennas’ to receive and transmit energy to the highest and magnificent of degree.

Except for ourselves, other individuals looking at us from the outside cannot see what we are surrounded by around ourselves.

I’ll say it again, I have never been and have never walked alone even when I did not know it, my ancestors and spirit guides have always been there beside me watching over me and providing for me through fashions of arcane communication and relation.

I can recall so many accounts of occurrence, times when I was in the midst of danger and they had come to save my life and/or had prevented serious injury and harm from being done unto me.

One that I’ll end with, though, pertains to the night my dining room was filled with the presence of a large group of my deceased relatives (the place where I had kept one of my altars at the time) and the strong bond that was felt there between us all along with the love and the security. They were all there gathered together in my home all able to visit and to spend moments of vital family union. Only the good members of the brood were allowed to come through.

Later on that night, after they all had left, one of my other deceased relatives had arrived to an empty setting and I was able to see him clearly and a voice had said to me “That’s Uncle Lee”.

I had said to myself, “Oh maybe that’s just a made up reference”, because sometimes foreign entities will come through or those that I am not familiar with to say things that I can’t put together or that just have no purpose that I am not immediately cognizant of, however, this was no foreign spirit messaging me that night I later found out.

I happened to mention the incident to my mother, what I had heard, and the description of the apparition that I saw, and she acknowledged to me that the man’s name was indeed “Lee” (a name that I’ll use instead of his real name because I am very protective and respectful toward my ancestors and I don’t share certain things that are sacred between us), he was her uncle, her mother’s brother and that he would always arrive to gatherings late after everything was over and after everyone had already gone.

Everything that my mother had described to me about my great uncle from his physical demeanor down to his character traits in which I had visioned and had felt within him through my own sight had astonishingly coincided with what my mother had told me and I had never seen this man before and we had never discussed him.

One thing that I know is that I am so proud to have him as a part of the family along with the others who are around me and who all will never let me ever walk here on this earth alone or without their love, guidance and protection.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Not So Strange To Me But True

mushrooms in the forestWhen I enter into one of my female resident’s room she frequently tells me how very pretty I am and that I must have a lot of boyfriends and a lot of sex.

And I asked her why does she say that and she answered to me because that is all that attractive people do and I found that comment awful strange considering the fact that looks don’t seem to have any bearing on how much sexual activity one gets.

I’ve seen plenty of ugly men and women with girlfriends and boyfriends and so many of them with children just look around everywhere you go, and they had to have had sex in order to have gotten those kids, I highly doubt that the majority of them went to sperm banks.

I told her no that I don’t have a lot of boyfriends just admirers and that I do not desire to have a boyfriend. So she asked me if I was a lesbian and I told her no that I was asexual that I don’t like men or women and that the human penis turns me off. She told me that she liked the penis and that she use to love to have sex and to not tell everybody how I felt because people would think that I was crazy and I told her that she was a very smart lady.

I had been told that before by another older woman to not tell nobody that I never had any feelings for a man and that if I did get involved with one at that time I would just use him to conceive a child but she wasn’t telling me to not say anything out of people thinking that I was crazy but because it would cause animosity toward me with certain men and even ignorant judgmental women.

She just didn’t want me to have to go through anymore unnecessary problems with undesirables than I was already going through and I understood but at that time I had already proudly let the cat out of the bag about how I felt even though some things I guess are better left unsaid and kept quiet just to keep the peace.

In spite of that I have to be free regardless and I don’t have any regrets in revealing the truth.

For all of my life since I was a child I have honestly never cared what anyone ever said or thought about me and it had always showed within my state of being and I know that is rare with most people in this day and age because a lot of individuals are bothered and affected by the thoughts and actions of others toward them.

Nevertheless, within my extreme uniqueness and creativity within thought, personality, and character I have been called a “far from crazy” individual with “exceptional sense” straight to my face by those who felt the need to express what they had observed through my presence and by my talent and knowledge.

mushroom sproutYet my knowledge, talents and presence have not always been appreciated by some, especially the undesirables-but who actually cares-I know that I don’t! That fact is not going to stop me from breathing and surviving, it is not what is feeding me, clothing me or paying my bills. And it is definitely not something that I need to support my peace and happiness!

We all have opinions though and all of our views, of course, are not going to be agreed upon or accepted by others and our opinions and perspectives may even seem or make us appear to be crazy to certain others and vise versa but a wide range of diversity is what makes the world go round even though there is much unneeded and unwanted variety and assortment that the world can do without.

One topic that I do not understand is when it comes to the penis, what is so alluring about it among so many? I always thought that the male organ was such an unpleasant thing to see testicals and all.

I would not even bring up the subject, however, I couldn’t help it because every time I’d assist one of my male residents with a urinal, catheter or diaper I couldn’t help be reminded to think “This is what women go crazy over?!”. “This is what so many women need and desire?!”

The sight of a penis actually makes me want to puke and that nasty shit that spurts out from it (the ejaculations and discharges) I wouldn’t want that going up inside of me constantly or continuously.

It is unfortunately a part of how we come into the world and I am plenty aware that there is so much to human biology that is absolutely amazing but the fact that the soul is the actual sustaining life force and the body is just the temporary living shell gives me comfort in knowing that I am so much more than part of a male’s DNA.

And we can be partially made up of an individual without having any of their traits (https://misslatoya.wordpress.com/2015/09/10/go-figure-food-for-thought/), thank goodness!

As a young girl and as a woman I had always actually wished that life was made up within a different fashion I wished it could be that if I as a female had to reproduce that I would be able to get pregnant on my own without any sperm just by a more pure method and natural independent process. I know that I am not the only woman/girl who feels or who has felt this way it is a huge world that we live in and whatever I may think or feel there is always someone else out there who has had that same thought and feeling. This particular issue may not be that common, but it is so.

mushroomTo me, the only beautiful thing that I read in the bible was Mary getting pregnant by the holy spirit, why couldn’t it had been that way in general getting pregnant without having to have sex and having to incorporate semen?

I do not have any children and I am glad that I don’t. I don’t want any child of mine coming here into the world the way that it is today.

To me sex is sick, and it is also a mind thing, because what is so necessary about having another human being on top of you intertwined thrusting back and forth-that is just my honest opinion.

And that is all it is my opinion!

So Sweet

accessories“She had coffee, I had tea, that little old lady was so sweet to me”.

Last Sunday afternoon on the twenty first of February I got a call on short notice from my job to do an overnight twelve hour shift but unfortunately I was unable to go. Then Wednesday I got another call on short notice asking if I could do a two day twelve hour night shift case yet again I was unavailable for that specific day but I informed that I was able to attend to the case for the next day so everything was settled.

On Thursday morning I was offered another case along with the case that I was already scheduled to go to and I accepted.

The first case was a twelve hour overnight the second was a double overnight and day shift. Then I was told that the first case was cancelled because the supervisors did not want me overworked without getting enough rest (so darn considerate I really appreciated that even though I was ready willing and able and have done far more loads of straight long hours of assignments within the past. I’ve been on jobs within the past whereas managers would try to take advantage of me just because they knew that I was a good reliable worker).

One of the nurses drove me over and out to the facility to where I was going to perform my duties as we were to meet with the administrative employees. There are a multiple of locations affiliated with my workplace establishment within the different areas and it is a great personal and professional experience.

These residential assisted living facilities are extremely high maintenance (no exaggeration) even more beautiful than the other ones that I have worked within and my client was a very lovely lady we hit it off instantly.

She insisted on buying me breakfast, lunch and dinner for the entire time that I was there with her and she refused to let me pay for my own food or reimburse her for what she had charged to her room and/or account.

My client told me that she really appreciated me being there and watching over her and that she knows that I work hard for my money, and she had just met me. I told her that it was my job to look after her she told me to be quiet!

She told me that at first she didn’t want or think that she was going to need an assistant but after she met me she said that she was glad that I came and that I was there.

Sometimes we don’t even realize how we influence people and the positive impact that we may have on their lives no matter how big and how small.

I’ve always got along with people who were older than me those individuals in particular who were on the level I have been very blessed.

I left to go to work on Friday afternoon and just got back home after eleven p.m. last night I worked a total of thirty one hours.

Tramp

blindfoldEverywhere that I go there have always been males who were very attracted to me all through out my life and still till this day yet I was never fazed by the circumstance. It had made no difference to me as I was very secure and wasn’t romantically interested in anyone in no way whatsoever.

Of course, there are males who can find a female attractive and give her a compliment without having any romantic or sexual intentions behind their observation. I’ve experienced that situation on many of occasion with males and even females who had approached me genuinely out of the kind propensity to express their own opinion.

A lot of people do it “Oh, he or she is so cute”, “Hey gorgeous”, and so on.

Some of that nonsense is at times also bullshit that people use both by men and women in order to flatter and/or to court for reasons that are calculating (some even do it just for fun to cruelly or trivially mock someone) as I have heard and witnessed the most unattractive of beings get called “beautiful” which in a variety of obvious fashions is considered to be pretty within appearance to many, including me.

I could never help whatever male that it was that had became attracted to me it wasn’t my fault especially the ones that were married or already involved within a type of relationship of one or more, however, when their female counterparts catch wind of their mate’s wandering eye and act out upon it within an irrational manner that is an entirely different story completely.

I remember how the assistant manager of a department store where I once worked at was extremely attracted to me and had desired me sexually he was so nervous one time that he had stumbled upon his words as we were talking. He was a married man who’d cheat on his wife but I just took advantage of the position within the store that he had the power to give to me and kept everything on a strictly professional level as I received good recognition on the job for being an exceptional employee whereas other females of a trashy nature would have flirted back and have been gratified and able to have been cajoled.

shoesThe assistant manager was not a good man but he knew that I was not the kind that was “idle” or apt to fall for any superficially inspired game and I do give him the benefit of the doubt for giving me the proper credit that I did deserve in my workplace.

Other degenerate cheats that hooked up with unattractive weak-minded whores that had taken their insecurities out on me I would never give any type of regard to as most of them liked to perpetuate a situation by playing the roles of instigator since I did not want or desire any of them at all.

Instead of laying blame on their own partner that they were sexually linked to or involved with they’d entertain the hunger to unreasonably “have it out with me” (they actually knew better than to come up and approach me) even though I didn’t personally know any of them all. Skanky males always recruit chicks that are dumber than they are in order to train and manipulate them through their own flaws of vulnerability.

These whores with low self esteem allow themselves to be pimped (used and abused) and propositioned. Isn’t it also something how women with derogatory backgrounds have the nerve to downgrade other woman with no history of promiscuous behavior by indeed calling them whores, and their equally warped male counterparts treating their sluts with more respect than they would toward a decent woman merely because their whores cater to their every whim and feed into the core of their outrageous male egos?

I recall a girl that got a job where I worked just to get a look at me because she knew that her man was interested in me and her “player” of a boyfriend constantly fed off of her lack of self confidence. She broke her neck to catch glimpses of me and one day grabbed a paper towel, threw it in the garbage, and then walked out of the employee bathroom the moment she spotted me up at the sink washing my hands after I had used the toilet.

see throughShe was so intimidated by me that she didn’t even use the rest room, knowing that she had to pee, and wiping her hands upon entering into the bathroom without even had wet or washed her hands, later on she passed by the area in which I worked within for me to see her.

At the end of our shift we happened to had ridden the same public bus together and I got a good look of her. Two days later she fought with her boyfriend as she was jealous over me. Instead of being worried over me she should have been more concerned over the job that she was unable to keep. This female only had worked two days spaced apart every other week yet could not hold up the position that she obviously must have not been qualified for.

After I encountered her once more there at the job (she gave me a phony smile of greeting) she disappeared and I never saw her again from then on.

Oh, how these tramps let the men in their lives make the most absolute fools out of them?

 

Lust Spell:(https://ladylatoya.wordpress.com/2016/02/22/lust-spell/)

 

In “Need” or In “Deed?”

sweet peek

I get tired of hearing the same old shit over and over again, especially when it is nugatory repetition.

I totally ignore what does not hold my attention, and inconsequential people, I pretend that they just aren’t there.

An individual is able to converse about an issue over again without the circumstance really bothering them it all depends, some people (in general) all they want to do is share a sob story simply to conduct a “pity party”. Have pity by yourself.

It is hilarious to me how a lot of people think that they have “real friends”. In instances as soon as some one’s back was turned their so called “friends” would come to me “talking up a storm”.

To me, that is not the proper way to deal, nevertheless, one would have to question an individual’s motive why are they around that other person to begin with?

And I know of course that people have smiled in my face then talked behind my back, in spite of that, they were not actually my friends just associates or acquaintances we all go through that.

Genuine friendships are rare they do exist though and there are people who can be trusted it is just not very easy to come by too often even though it is common for a lot of folk to encounter, understand?

Everybody does talk but there is a difference between gossip and a healthy discussion whatever I have to say about someone I have no problem telling them straight to their face I always have. Of course, that may cause someone else hurt feelings and/or cause me some lifelong enemies it makes no difference to me my life goes on.

I’d rather be the most hated person in the world if that meant staying true to who and what I actually was. As authentic people up against any type of combat we fight harder, maintain and survive.

I’ve never had a bad reputation and I never will, in fact, I do not give a fuck about “a reputation” as reputation is indeed merely what people entertain an “idea”, “belief” or “opinion” about not exactly what is “definite”. My “character” is who I truly am as a person and our character is who we actually are as individuals so I’ve never “sweated” that shit.

I have consistently had credibility as I have “never” been known as or considered as a liar by anyone within and around my circles that is why I am and was so trusted and why people that knew me personally would come to me when they wanted to hear or verify the truth. People who’ve only known me for a short time also had strong faith in me because they liked me and could sense the genuineness that I possess.

However, I have been told that I am a little too honest and that I “Say things that I should not say”.

sweet treatsThat is one of the many reasons adversaries of mine had worked witchcraft on me within the past while in the midst of spreading their pathetic lies because no one was “naturally” listening and/or believing anything that was negatively being said about me.

They were all envious and jealous of my character, the strength and the confidence that I had (and tried so desperately to rob me of those qualities) and constantly judging me for the things that I was not doing. “You think that you are better than everyone else just because you are not doing the same things that other people are doing, but you are not”, an old man once conveyed to me out of resentment. This person had lived a foul life and eventually died like a dog, what does that acknowledge in regard to him, it all speaks for itself.

Why was he and others so worried about my life?

I am in no way the only one who has encountered this nonsense a lot of good people or people in general are the target of “sick” and “illogical” people’s attempts at devilishness manipulation through their own ignorance. Yet why let them spoil one’s life and contentment especially if or when there is a chance to get to see them all fall and disintegrate?

Isn’t it just lovely to witness the collapse of a person through the hands of their own back fire? Instead of what they had set out to do to you they began to reap. “Intention” completely turned around and happened to them but even more viciously.

Just hang in there and give it time those who are no good and continue on with doing dirt always get their paid up dues with much “interest” and the rates are very high.

Believe me when I state it these assholes are all catching hell within their lives they have gone down lower than what they already were, and will go down even farther into the lower pits of their own tortuous hell.

Never forget, though do move on and enjoy all that life has to wonderfully offer, and let them in particular observe and continue to perish.

 

I’d rather be hated for who I truly am than to be loved or respected for who and what I am really not:

(https://ladylatoya.wordpress.com/2013/02/27/id-rather-be-hated-for-who-i-truly-am-than-to-be-loved-or-respected-for-who-and-what-i-am-really-not/)

In Response To: “What I Want For The Holidays!”

just chillin

 

diwakar
WordPress
When we last faith on people naturally we go for fine creatures like puppies which show their gratitude , faithfulness and love towards us.

 

 

misslatoya
misslatoya.wordpress.com
In reply to diwakar.Everything is not about losing faith within people. Some people in general do choose puppies/dogs over people do to being hurt, disappointed, or whatever their circumstances or situation may be but that has absolutely nothing to do with me and my case at all.

I had my very first puppy at the age of seven and I have always been attracted to them and have cared for them way more than I have cared for people and I had never ever been hurt or disappointed or lost faith within anybody (people turn me off with their ignorance), I by nature just had taken to certain puppies/dogs much better than I have with people and it is much more about and has much more to do about with their magnetism.

I never loved anyone easily I am not the type I am very particular because love has to come naturally and I have never within my forty years found too many people that I have felt that emotion for and I am proud of that because If somebody like me loves one that means that person has got to really be something.

I have genuine family within my life that have in the past as well as still up until now to this day that have shown me nothing but fierce and genuine gratitude, faithfulness and love yet I do not need that from anyone to thrive as I already have that within myself. I do not need any substitute through the animals.

 

Not Just Blowing Smoke

135274-1024x768-Indeed_bulletsI remember sometime back in the mid nineties a discussion that I had over the telephone with an associate of mine. I call this person who was a female an associate because I was never quick to describe everyone who I dealt with as a friend.

I’ve known and have come across a lot of people within my lifetime and I never wanted to be just anyone’s pal or to even consider and accept everyone to be as a real or true good friend.

A lot of my associates were genuinely fond of me yet I was never the type to get too socially or too closely involved into the lives of others. I was always the independent soul. The private loner who did not care to be bothered very often. And many people in particular had to respect that fact whether they liked it or not.

There was nothing really that they could do about it anyhow because I was going to do what I wanted to do and I was going to be how I wanted to be!

What my associates loved about me the most was that they could put their trust in me. I was genuine. A person of good conversation, smart, and fun to be around.

I feel that the word “friend” is and has so often been a term that is too loosely used now and again.

True friends in general are hard to find and everybody does not deserve the true title that comes along with being a good one.

Anyway, I had known this girl since I was fourteen. We were both in our early twenties when we were having our chat over the phone. We never saw each other quite too often. It was just an occasional engagement whenever we would get into contact with one another from time to time. We were totally different in character. She was a wild child, I wasn’t.

547259-1024x768-Nevertheless, the vast difference in personality and within lifestyle never intervened into the relationship between I and certain others if we both had a strong connection to each other, or some other particular trait and characteristic that were similar and that we both liked about one another.

I never cared what other people did within their own personal life. It was purely about how they treated and reacted in regards to me as an individual.

One thing that I can honestly say about the people that have come in and out of my life is that no matter what they did or how they may have lived their lives they never ever once tried to influence me in any way when it came down to drugs, alcohol, and many of the other things that I never desired to do or to indulge in.

I mean, there are some who are always going to get those assholes who will come around by trying and endeavoring to manipulate one’s mind with their unscrupulous behaviors and their mischievous tactics in order to gain satisfaction through the degradation of attempting to drag another person down into their lowest of levels.

However, those types of degenerates are to just automatically be dismissed without further thought, but to only be recognized and remembered for the insight and experience of circumstances that are brought or gone through within our lifespan.

So as my associate and I went on with our talking and speaking about the specific and various topics regarding social issues, the world, and life altogether, we came upon the subject of how the male and female roles within our society are generally often bias.

The girl who’s name was Tiani stated “It all starts within the home”.

And though she did have a significant point as many do live what they grow up within and around I had another point of view to infer.

file0001986546235“Everybody who lived in my home either smoked or drank. My aunt and uncle did hard drugs. I never did any of those things”, I told her, imparting how society itself can lend a hand and also play a big part of the influencing when it came to the personal or psychological development within some people, and what may entice their perspectives and behavior.

“Well, everybody isn’t as strong as you are”, Tiani had told me back in return.

I never at all thought back then that in not being affected by the things that were going on around me had anything to do with strength. I hadn’t analyzed the concept or even gave it much thought because my mind did not think like the average human being.

To me, things of that nature seemed beneath the tides of strength because in my opinion I could not have even imagined being tempted do to something that I deemed as either disgusting, having no basis, or as serving no purpose.

My mother had verified though that not easily being influenced and not doing certain things that are considered unnecessary and negative to one’s state of existence indeed had to do with being strong within the mind.

I understand that smoking is a habit “to” and that it comes as a habit “for” a lot of people. A very nasty habit that appears to be very hard for many to conquer and to overcome. I do not at all personally knock anyone who likes to smoke or who just cannot help from smoking due to the addictive and hazardous effects of the nicotine as well as the tar (the toxic chemicals) and the other unhealthy additives.

Yet cigarette smoking is something that I hate to be around and something that I do not understand. To me it is such a silly act (inhaling then exhaling repulsive garbage and fumes) that contributes to the spoiling and to the ruining of one’s body, health, and well-being.

My grandmother was an alcoholic and a smoker and died from a form of lung cancer because her lifestyle made her vulnerable to the evils and negative energies and backlashes that were able to snuff out her life.

Never would I go out of this world in such a way.

file0001616189463A strong and healthy physical and spiritual constitution can miraculously maintain and sustain an individual through a serious ailment if they have taken good or excellent quality care of themselves for an long extension of time. They would be able to fight off and restrain any of the conditions that would normally affect or cause some major type of deterioration.

Aside from other relatives, I also know acquaintances who continue and who will continue to smoke regardless of the risks that it may cause to the quality of their lives. Even after the doctors had already told them that if they did not quit sometime soon there would be nothing that could be done for them medically (to prolong their life and to protect them from the certain drastic health problems) once a certain amount of time had passed over.

I can definitely understand carrying on with something that may bring a specific consequence or controversy out into the forefront through some particular fashion or by some celestial means as long as one truly and firmly believes in what is being held and is ultimately benefiting from what may be rewarded.

However, I do not comprehend the empty and worthless need to continue to smoke for the sake of self elimination.

Smoking as many of us know comes in a many of different types and forms. People have their own preferential choices and addictions. Some choose or have a weakness to smoke dope, crack, and/or to freebase (smoke cocaine).

Some also like to smoke “joints” (marijuana/weed) and blunts (hawaiian cess and so on).

Whether it is a addiction or just the indulgence in an casual “high” none of the behavior serves toward productivity, unless maybe when directed for the required medical purpose or use of particular herbs and other substances.

Nevertheless, whether banned within certain public areas, or currently still processed illegally, smoking is here to stay right now for the most part.

file0001682159498I bet if a lot of people could calculate just exactly how much money that they have spent over the years and throughout the decades on the numerous purchases on their packs of cigarettes they’d begin to realize how they would have accumulated a significant amount of wealth that could have been considered a fortune! Even if it was just a small one.

When some people first began and started out to smoke (a lot of the time mostly the younger crowd) they did it because they thought that it was cool or that it would make them appear to look cool.

What is so cool about blowing smoke?

Some people would even go buy and smoke substances because it was the “in” thing to do. Going along with the fads and trends of the times.

What is so cool about blowing away money?

Then there are some who even claim that a good smoke contributes to relaxation and brings a calming affect or a relief to the nerves.

What is so cool about blowing one’s life away?

To me, smoking anything for any reason is nothing more than what it actually is, and that is a bunch of “silly and messy ashes that result from being the victim of someone blowing off their hot calamitous air”. And I am not and never will be one to get caught up into the midst of that hazy and stinging fog!

file000159568804

A Few Responses To My Mother And Daughter Relationship Post

1395713_baby_kisshttps://misslatoya.wordpress.com/2013/04/06/the-mother-and-daughter-relationship/

Tulan on Fri, 04/05/2013 – 18:18.

I was without a father, also, but I always longed for a dad. All my friends had dads and I missed having one, although my mother and I had a great relationship.I felt like I missed out.

LaToya on Fri, 04/05/2013 – 23:44.

Thanks for sharing your story. It is always nice to observe and hear another person’s personal perspective. I did know my father and I had met his family yet I felt absolutely no type of connection to them as they were not at all my class of people to want to be around. And I am glad that he was not in my life. I did not miss out on anything as far as he was concerned. I am very sure though that many females have loved having their fathers around. To each his or her own. Sorry that you did not get the chance to experience what you felt you missed out on.

16471753-happy-mother-and-daughter-laughing-together-outdoors

oreiro on April 07th, 2013 @ 03:51 pm

Very good. Very strong.
Like it.
and I can agree with you (Ihave got a doughter), but I am also divorced when she was 2yrs and tobe honest – girls need fathers.

It’s my opinion, you’ve got your own and that’s good. I don’t know you, but I see what you write here and I can say – you wrote absolutely true things – your Mum has done a good job in upbringing you and you will do the same with yours children!!!
….(but it doesn’t mean that doughters don’t need fathers…)

LaToyaLawrence on April 07th, 2013 @ 04:04 pm

I agree with you completely. There are daughters that do indeed need a father figure within their lives. We are all different. I have no disagreements with what you said.

15027094-affectionate-mother-and-daughter-looking-at-camera

itdawn69 on April 07th, 2013 @ 04:34 pm

The bond between a mother and daughter is great. However, I have to say that a strong father figure in a daughter’s life makes a difference. I have seen little girls grow up with no father and find that they do not know what a good relationship between a man and woman looks like. How can she choose a good husband or boyfriend? This is my opinion but a child girl or boy needs to have two parents so that they can see how love grows and how men and women should inter act with each other. My daughter was raised with two parents and her views on relationships and even sex are different from her friends who did not have a two parent home. I am not saying a child can not develop and mature ok in a single parent home but it is hard for one person to be both mother and father to a child. Children do not come with manuals so we just have to work with what we have and hope that our children turn out good.

LaToyaLawrence on April 09th, 2013 @ 11:52 am

Like I said we are all indeed different. I have grown up with males and females. I know who my father was and I still do.

However, I did not ever have a need for him. And love comes naturally. There is no set standard within how a man and a woman love one another.

I personally was born Asexual so I never had any sexual attraction or desire for any man. And I am very proud of that.

If I ever had any children no father will be involved because that is my prerogative. What comes out of my body belongs to me. I would go to a sperm bank.

And society in my opinion is not a good example of the male and female roles as it is often bias. I am more into what is natural than as to what is generalized.

To me the union between a man and a woman is unnatural and undesirable. And that has absolutely nothing to do with me not growing up around a father figure.

There have been plenty of men who were interested in me who were shocked to see that I was not the average female.

I have an entirely different mentality and I always knew a whole lot about different types of men and people because I am very intelligent and I was born with a caul/veil (the gift of second-sight).

No one has ever been able to put anything over on me.

I knew things that women who regularly dealt with men did not know about them.

There have been fathers of other young females and uncles of other young females who have told me that they wish that their female relatives were like me because many of them were getting dogged out and messed over by men.

A father even told me that he wished he had of brought his daughter over to talk to me before he found out that she had went and got pregnant at the age of eighteen.

He informed that he would have made her get an abortion if his wife had not kept the pregnancy hidden from him to a more later time.

There are many stories that I can tell.

However, to each his or her own, but this is a huge world and society and I definitely know for a fact that particular females do not at all need any male influence within the home to be productive and knowledgeable within the certain areas of life. And I am very firm on that because I am living proof!

There are certain things that men just do not understand when it comes to a female-I’m speaking from personal experience.

Some females who are too emotional and insecure make it bad for other women who are just the opposite.

All women do not get sexually attached to men through sex. All women do not get hurt if men mess around with other women, some do not even care.

Words like bitch and whore are not offensive to me yet many women do get offended by those words and men think that they can hurt a woman by saying those things.

Many women are brainwashed by the male influence. I could go on but I do not need to write a novel.

People will and are going to think what they want to think.

I am just very glad that I am very open-minded and that I am not limited and do not let anyone persuade my judgement in life.

No one can tell me anything that contradicts what I have experienced and what I know through insight, wisdom, and perception.

The Mother And Daughter Relationship

1157462-1024x768In my opinion the mother and daughter relationship is one of the best relationships that are in existence.

If I had ever had any children I would have wanted nothing other than two daughters. No marriage. Just myself, my career, my daughters, and a few female canine companions.

I happily grew up in a home without a father.

In fact, as a very young child I never knew that there was a such thing as a father. And when I did come to realize the parental role of a male influence I definitely did not desire to have one.

My mother spoiled me with so much love and affection. I never wanted for anything.

I had never ran around to have sex with anyone. I had never used or experimented with drugs or alcohol. And I had never gotten into any trouble with the law.

I grew up to become a very strong, confident, and independent woman with much self love and very much self respect.

Whether or not my mother always understood me or not I could always go to her to talk to her about anything.

In the like, my mother had always shared any and everything with me also. We just had that type of open and honest communication between us.

A lot of people within the neighborhood that I grew up in as a child were very envious of the relationship that my mother and I had.

We were always together most of the time.

My mother had never ever put a man before me. She always had my back no matter what.

My mother never doubted or underestimated my potential.

If anything she was certain about all of my abilities and would compliment me with proud bouts of  healthy positivity along with assiduous encouragement.

I have never been hurt, abused, or damaged in life. And I give much of that credit to my mother in that field.

859726-1024x768-

My mother had taken very good care of me. I was well provided for and very well protected.

Society has often knocked single parent family upbringing.

Contributing many problem factors to children and young teens as a result of growing up in a so called broken home.

Well as far as I am concerned the stable environment that my mother raised me up in could not have been any more solidly put together.

Aside from the other few negative family members that I had to live with, and their foolish ways, and their mixed up minds, our lives were and are completely intact.

If  all single parent homes were supervised or established under an inappropriate mode why did I turn out so perfectly well with no personal hang ups and no societal drawbacks?

The only troubles or obstacles that I was continually plagued by were those that were of or caused by jealous and miserable people.

In which these are universal difficulties to overcome not situations that are reflected to single parent circumstances.

I have observed and have personally known quite a few individuals who had come from two parent family homes. Many who were nothing but disappointments or embarrassments to their unsuspecting mothers and fathers.

A married union does not necessarily equate correctness within the home.

It is the individual character that matters in particular cases. The love, the knowledge, the dedication, and the sufficiency of a capable person.

Everyone is not marriage material and everyone is not father or mother material.

However I do know this.

And that is that I would not in the most be all of the healthy and productive female that I am if I had not had the privilege of growing up with just a mother in a single parent home.

I learned true freedom, security, and leadership.

Other than the innate qualities that I was born with and that I naturally had inherited on my own.

I was enhanced, and better equip for and throughout the journey of my life as a female due to the initial liberation that began from being a daughter.

A daughter who breathed true contentment with no restrictions on a personal territory.

A woman who chooses the demands of her own.

Not accompanied by the biases and influences of the world. Not apologetic toward the world.

And not apologetic toward the reigns and the ruins that are instinctively behind the world.

I am a bambino. A girl. A lady. A woman.

A child of another woman who knows the incomparable beauty of the relationship between a daughter and her mother.

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Our Canine Companions

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Canines are indeed my only type of favorite pet to share a home with. From birth, and as they grow, many of them are so cute and cuddly, intelligent and inquisitive, loving and protective.

So fiercely loyal, canines make the best of friends aside from being extra added-on members to a family.

There is something very special and unique about puppies and dogs.

6812-1024x768-[DesktopNexus_com]They have an appeal that is irresistible to the avid admirer of the canine species.

I as a human being have always been enamored with their character and behavior.

285308-1024x768-White_German_shepherd_puppyOnce they pass that destructive stage of chewing and tearing up things around and inside of the house they develop and progress into their own distinct personalities along with their natural inherited traits.

6709-1024x768-[DesktopNexus_com]There are so many breed of canine to choose from depending on preference and temperament.

My breeds of choice are the German Shepherd, the Collie, and the Golden and Labrador Retrievers.

I love the fierceness and the intelligence within the shepherds.

The Collies and retrievers are also very bright and they have such a sweet, fine nature.

All puppies and dogs love to play and eat. Their sudden energy spouts may at times tire one out, however, in my opinion that spiritedness is what keeps the atmosphere within the home lively.

These animals bring a lot of life into the environment as they are so innately animated and energetic. They are exciting creatures to have around.

Canines have allure. They are mysterious, fun, sneaky, mischievous.

They have a particular charm and charisma about them. It is in their stance, their bark, in the wag of their tail, in the way that they snarl.

Canines are good for our overall wellness and state of mental health.

They bestow upon us therapeutic properties, physical as well as emotional. They do this through their auras.

They have the ability to help us relax. They give to us comfort while at the same time they manage to bring to us much great joy.

No devoted puppy or dog owner can deny the extreme love and attachment that can be acquired over the years between them and their pet.

The canine and human connection is exceptional. The relationship is a kind, considerate, demanding, and sometimes challenging one. And it is an association that the world should never be without.

 

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Proud To Be Asexual/The Liberating Truth About My Asexuality

1037736-200I was a very cute little girl growing up. And young males were always attracted to me. Always bothering me.

Whereas I found the behavior of the opposite sex quite annoying most females would have enjoyed the attention.

When I was coming up in the 1980’s many of the children living around me within my neighborhood were having sex at a very early age.

One of the youngest girls that I knew of at the time was about the age of eight. The boy whom she had had sexual relations with was at the age of either ten, or eleven.

They both lived on the same street that I was living on. Neither one of their parents were good examples of what a mother or father should have been.

Anything of a sexual nature was the last thing that had ever crossed into my mind. I was a very content child, enjoying my life, playing with my barbie dolls, and loving the puppy that I had.

I had a very good mother who took care of me and who had gave me her undivided love and attention. I never went out looking for love, affection, or attention. I did not have to. I was a very secure young person.

If I did lack the love and attention that every child should have, and that every child deserves from their parent. I definitely would not have searched for it by spreading my legs to any young or old man who had acquired to come along. That would have just been totally absurd in my opinion.

As I was getting older and reaching into my late teenage years I had still found the amorous behavior of the males to be annoying. All that I knew was that I was not at the least bit attracted or interested in any one of them and just wished that they would all go away and leave me alone.

I had known ever since the age of fifteen that I was asexual. And I was very proud and in no way ashamed. To me being asexual was just as normal and natural as breathing. I did not know anything else.

I did not have any desire to have intercourse with a guy. I did not even want to kiss one.

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There were people around me at the time who had never heard of the term “asexual”. When I’d tell certain people that I wasn’t interested in males they’d immediately speculate or assume that something negative had to have happened within my life.

That maybe I had experienced a bad relationship. Or had seen other people experience bad romantic relationships. Neither one of the conclusions that were drawn were anywhere near the truth.

Another huge misconception that certain people had about me was thinking that they could “change” or “repair” me. Repair what? There was nothing about me that was wrong or broken. If anything, I was very well put together, and perfect.

I could not understand why people would make such a big deal when it came to their romantic encounters, the attractions that they had for other people, and the way that they were just ready to jump into relationships with people that they had crushes on.

While many around me were coupled off I always remained happily single. I use to get so sick and tired of hearing what was going on with this one and that one’s boyfriend or girlfriend. I did not want to listen to that crap. I was not involved in all of that crazy and ridiculous drama. So why should I have gotten myself into the middle of it?

I could have cared less about who was cheating on who. And what so and so went an did, and why. I mean please, these people needed to get a real life. I know that I had one. A life that was not full of a bunch of ignorant nonsense.

As an asexual person myself I do not ,however, represent the attitudes that every or all asexuals have. I would never generalize anyone because we are all very different and have our own unique personalities, preferences, and views.

Nevertheless, us asexuals all do have a common trait. We lack a sexual interest and attraction to other people, regardless of what the sex is of the other person. Asexuality is not a form of lesbianism, homosexuality or bisexuality. Asexual means “without” sexuality.

I personally never understood why a woman would want to let a man stick his genitals up inside of her. It is the most undesirable and unnatural thing for me to process.

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I know that most heterosexual and sexually active people would consider my attitude and way of thinking to be strange and insane, especially since sexual intercourse was naturally designed for a man and a woman by their God.

Religion does not at all in any way play a part in my asexuality. In fact, I am into my Yoruban (African) ancestral and orisha worship-but that is another story.

My spirituality itself does innately support what and who I am though. My asexuality is one of the biggest parts of my identity. An identity that my spirituality and I embrace wholeheartedly. The foundation of my spirituality is based on truth, knowledge, love, and respect.

If one does not truly love, respect, and know them self there is no strength nor purpose deeply rooted within them.

I am liberated through my asexuality and my spirituality. The two most beautiful things about my life. I believe in self expression and honesty. In one being true, and true to one self.

Asexual people range in a wide variety because each individual has their own experience. And what some people consider and identify as being asexual also ranges widely.

Even though most asexuals do not seek out sexual relationships many of them are looking for companionship.

Intimacy is not always about intercourse. Some asexuals just want to have a close, loving, and sexless relationship that focuses on a romantic friendship. Doing everything that a girlfriend and boyfriend would do except have sex. Sharing one another’s interest. Having children together, and so on.

Some asexual people will have sexual intercourse with their/or a partner if they want to please them or if they want to have children. It all depends on the situation and circumstances.

There are some asexuals who claimed that they have had sexual interests and had been in sexual relationships at one time in their life.

Then you have the ones who are like me who have never had any sexual interest, feelings, or attraction for the opposite sex.

I did consider wanting to have a child at one time. During my teenage years I didn’t really want to have a baby in my adult years. However, I said if I did, I would go to a sperm bank if I could afford to-or I would just find a man who was interested in me and just use him for his sperm then I’d go about my business.

When I actually did become an adult I changed my mind about having children. I decided that I was ready and would attempt to conceive a child. Nevertheless, it did not work out as I had planned, and the outcome definitely turned out for the best.

I could not afford the sperm bank at that particular time in my life. And the males that were around me were not worth anything. They were not attractive mentally or physically. They were undesirable. So I definitely did not want or need a child running around here on this earth that would constantly remind me of anyone of them.

Now I am thirty seven years of age and again i’ve changed my mind. I absolutely do not want any children. I am very happy the way that I am. I did not need a child or two to make my life complete or anything that would refer to that category.

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The thought of children, having my own daughters, was a natural female desire. After all, when us female babies come into the world we’re already born with the billions of eggs that are supplied to us for reproduction purpose.

And that is also why we ovulate to prepare us for a possible conception. Then we bleed (get our menstrual cycles) to dispense of an unfertilized egg so we can again be ready to prepare for another possible pregnancy.

So there is no need for me to explain any of my reasons. For a woman to want to have a child is completely natural. Far more natural than so called copulation.

If I wanted to have a baby out of wedlock and without a man in the child’s life-that would have been my prerogative. And I have no apologies.

As an asexual human being living on the planet life for me is grand. I would not have my life arranged in any other way.

The only thing truly missing right now within my life is a couple of pets. I’ve always loved and had a puppy or dog living with me at one point or another. I am working on getting three puppies to share my home with for the future. And they will all be my three babies.

My Love And Light

A lot of people hold back on things on account of the fears that they may have. Fear of what people would think, fear of being misjudged, fear of criticism, fear of ridicule, fear of rejection, fear of controversy and so on.

And some just keep quiet because they feel that some things are just better left unsaid.

There are always going to be those who misinterpret, perceive ignorant notions, and continue to make wrong accusations against what they disagree with or against what they do not comprehend/understand.

In some of my posts I have mentioned “my love and light”. And I just bet that there were some who thought that I was referring to “god” the god of the bible (Jehovah, Yahweh or whatever you want to call him) but however I was not.

God is definitely not my love and light. And I have never ever claimed to be any soldier of his army.

Yes I indeed was born with the gift of second-sight. I am extremely sensitive. I have a power within me to write that is led by spirit and many other special spiritual abilities, yet that does not make me a person who walks with god.

In true fact, I genuinely hate god. I hate him with everything that is within me and I am very proud of that. As far as I am concerned god is a very sick, evil, demented and demonic spirit force that many are blinded by.

Whoever deals with me will get the straight up truth about how I feel and what I am about. I do not hide behind lies out of fear. It makes me feel good to be able to speak the truth, it sometimes even screams to come out because it needs to be heard and acknowledged.

Am I a bad person since I detest god so much, absolutely not. It is the exact opposite! When I was a little girl I often wondered where did god come from. Who created him and how did he come into existence. And what makes him the ultimate authority figure?

I’ve read the bible, what was so drastically wrong with eve eating an apple- the forbidden fruit-from the tree of knowledge. What was wrong with her eyes being opened to awareness/knowledge/perception?

So what, she disobeyed god. What were his motives for wanting her to stay ignorant? Control I say. Just like the way of the world still is today. Then threatening and punishment for not listening to the bullshit instructions on a life that may not be befitting to all even if it is just in concern for the very minority.

I’ve noticed that a lot of people who claim to be deeply or overly religious have a lot of skeletons in their closets. Sometimes they’ll hit rock bottom, get scared, then they run to “god” and hide behind the church in an attempt to gain “redemption”.

It even seems that god shows a favoritism toward these kinds. I can understand that though because I have absolute favoritism for what is of my kind/class/nature too.

Some of these people make me sick with their false sense of justification! They will come across a person who never did any of the dirt that they have done then have the nerve and audacity to make them appear like they are the ones who are the worse thing in the world. That is a result of sickness mixed in with guilt and jealousy over the other person’s character.

What made them turn into the person that they were in the first place? Oh, “sin” of course.

Well, I never truly trusted in god and I do not agree with his scriptures. And I never messed up my life in any way. Just look at how the world is so sex crazed. “Be fruitful and multiply”, god said. “A woman and a man become one flesh after sexual intercourse/marriage” supposedly-whatever.

I honestly think that the sexual union between a man and a woman is one of the most ugliest and sickest things that are in existence and I never did and-do not want any part of it.

I don’t care what the rest of the world does but god’s plans do not apply to me.

As a teenager and as an adult I was never sexually active. A lot of people just assumed I had high morals or that it had to do with my religious beliefs. None of that was true. Yes, I’ve always highly respected myself, however, that was indeed not the reason that I did not want to have sex.

Number one, I was never attracted to men. The penis is a very big turn off in every way to me. Number two, I love my body and the thought of a man’s penis banging up against my precious insides then spurting out his nasty body fluids to mix in with mine was another complete turn off.

The only beautiful thing that I read in the bible was about marry conceiving a child without the aid of a man. And I deeply wish that could have been the normal way of life for reproduction purposes.

The very first time I ever indulged in the sexual act was at the age of twenty-four, and the last time was at the age of twenty four! It was a one time and never again thing.

I never would have done it to begin with if I had the money to go to a sperm bank at the time. I wanted to conceive a child and it didn’t work out and it was all for the best. I don’t really want a child by somebody that I would have to go to bed with. Especially someone I did not desire in any way, form or fashion.

If I was to conceive a child it will be done because I truly want her and not out of any unnatural sexual lust or desire.

I was proud of myself for not having no sexual attachment, no sexual feeling, and no emotion when I did the act. I did not feel any pleasure nor any pain. I did not feel anything mentally or physically.

And I had absolutely no respect for the guy I was with. It was a ridiculous act, one that made no sense. And it really made me wonder what was wrong with the rest of the world and god. Sex is not sacred to me, sex is sick!

I’ve been through numerous deep “spiritual experiences” since childhood. I’ve had evil witchcraft spirits removed/extracted from my body. I’ve had spirits go through me-come in/leave out. And god himself was the demonic force behind the “brujeria” that I went through in the past-and the brujeria that has tried to be sent back to me during a many failed attempts.

I know this for a fact. I saw it through my own eyes. I bet there are many who don’t know that and many who would not believe it because they think god is so good. But I know, I experienced it, and I know who Satan “really” is. And I am glad to know the truth. No one has a clue of the things/realities that I feel, hear, know, and see.

A lot of people believe that “god” has the strongest power. I do not because if he did he would have been able to destroy me a long time ago through his evil followers. I told this neighbor of mine years ago that I felt that god was sick. And she got highly excited and upset with me.

“God is not sick”, she said raising her voice. “Don’t you know that god can suck the life out of you?!”

“So why hasn’t he?” I said to myself.

Some time after our disagreement this woman developed medical problems and was put on oxygen. She got one of her legs cut off from gangrene that was associated with diabetes, caught dementia and then eventually died. So who got the life sucked out of whom?

It may sound harsh but she talked that shit to me just for expressing what I felt and look what happened to her. I don’t go around knocking anyone or telling them what will happen to them just because they do not agree with what I do or do not believe in.

Some people seriously need to check themselves. It is one thing to have a belief/opinion and another to try to force something onto someone. It just doesn’t work that way. There definitely is a powerful force/forces other than “god”. And that is fact.

What the bible considers or/and refers to as devil worship is my “love and light”. Now of course, I know better-that it is not actually the true worship of demons even though demons do disguise themselves in many different forms and fashions. And I could just as easily say that most are being deceived by god as god to me is what Satan is to the Christians.

There is so much that I could express, debate with, and so on, however there is so much that I am able to put in a post.

For the most part though, I am surrounded by peace, happiness, and truth. I feel free, secure, and strong. I am my self, my true self, all of the things that my love and light allows me to be.

My love and light gives me pleasure. God always made me feel miserable. My love and light wants me to be who I am. God wants me to be who he wants me to be-someone who is not my self.

God has continuously tried to fight for my identity to overtake my spirit and it is a battle that he will never win. That crap about giving us all free will is a lie. I know for me as a spiritual person with strong sensitivities and wisdom that he wants me to yield and lean towards his own structural program.

I never loved god. I do not like his style. I do not like his certain creations. I’d rather not have life than to live under any influences of his. My mind is something that he will never get inside of to brainwash and control.

Every thing that I feel is completely of my own. No one has ever been able to coerce me and no one has put anything into my head. I came to know what I know naturally and honestly and I am absolutely proud. I am a grown woman!

I love my ancestors and orishas-my spiritual connections/the universe-and all of my positive spiritual energies. I am a very good person who has lead a very good life. A good life that “god” cannot take any credit for!

I have gone through so much in this life on account of sick negativity and negative people and I was still the one to come out untouched and unaffected. And I owe that all to my strong spirit along with my “loves and lights” that have always shined upon me with the most ultimate of care.

Our bonds are so tremendously strong and our loyalties are so immensely tight that if the tables were turned “id rather burn in a hell with what I love and respect than to abide in a so called heaven with a god that I loathe and despise. Perhaps the day will come when god will exist no more (that would be something for me to look forward to-wishful thinking!)

I do not at all fear going to a place of eternal torment. Torment for me would be spending eternity with god. A place in where I do not want to be. God is the hellfire. Many get a taste of his hell right here on earth-yet they still foolishly praise him and glorify him, to each their own.

I definitely do not care what anyone thinks or says about me, I never did. I do however get highly insulted if or when someone tries or wants to connect me in any way with their god of the bible. His scriptures, will, and so called authority has no bearing on me. I have no regard for him whatsoever and he is not above me. He is nothing but shit!

My Family/My Spiritual Connection/My Back Up

I never feel lonely. I have always been secure within myself and my surroundings. I am very grounded mentally and spiritually. I have all that I need to sustain me.

The Family Circle:

It irritates me when a relative does not get acknowledgement because they are dead. Does their being deceased make them any less of your family, no way, certainly not!

(I am mostly unlike any of the family-but if someone were to mention oh she favors so an so in some form or another-that is because they’ve never exactly seen or came into contact with family that I actually do share similarity with)

I have relatives that are still alive here on the earth (and some distant relatives as well) whom I absolutely do not care a thing for or, about! And I do not take after anyone of them at all either-thank my lucky stars.

My dear family members that I truly love and respect have for a long time been in their graves, but they definitely are not forgotten. I see a lot of them in myself. We were all genuinely of one another. And we still are in spirit. And that fact is so sentimentally beautiful to me.

We can pick our friends; however, we cannot pick the families that we are born into. Yet those as humans should continue to be very selective when they hold a particular standard in regards to mating.

I am asexual, so would not definitely make the mistake of mixing with an individual of a lesser value. I still intend on going to a sperm bank if I ever considered to have a child.

I deeply wish that I weren’t genetically related to certain members of my “so-called” family (especially my father and one of my dead great grandmothers-which was my mother’s father’s mother. They were the two biggest mistakes that were made during the mating process). I can’t even bare to call them relatives.

What hugely makes up for the misfortunes though-is that aside from whatever else was created through the “runts” of the family-there is a solid foundation. Overall, my original family tree is a class of strong, authentic, intelligent, dignified and gifted people individuals of pure integrity folks who are just like me who I love, and am proud of.

My ancestors and I have a very powerful bond that connects us together through my mediumship. Our strong relationship is built on genuine love and trust. They serve as my spirit guides along with other elements of the universe.

Our family circle is important to us as we are particular in which we surround. We hold each other near and dear forever and for always. We are tight knit and legit. And we never cease to quit.

I love who and where I come from because it is a part of what defines me. My lineage explains a lot of my spirituality, the gifts that I was born with, and the particular things that I am inclined to.

I am still my own unique individual with my own mind and beliefs. My family circle and I are all one in the same, with us all sprouting out from our very own distinct branches.

Even in their deaths they (my beloved ancestors) never left me. They remained around me as shields and resources, passing on to me the valuable assets of my birthrights.

Nothing and no one can ever violate our “family circle”.

My Spiritual Clan And Our Family Tree:

I have great love, protection, guidance and loyalty from my beloved ancestors and orishas. We are a complete spiritual team.

I call them “my spiritual clan (the orishas/loas and elemental universal forces) and our family tree (my ancestors/spirit guide energies)”.

They were always there for me. Leading me in my way and escorting me throughout my journey of exploration and discovery.

Things that I knew and perceived about life when I was a child were revealed, defined, and confirmed to me during the stages of my development.

By nature, there is an unwavering consistency of character and affect between my spiritual connection and I.

I am a person of my word. One who is able to be relied upon. And a person who does not fail to come through if I am genuine and/or knowledgeable about the situation.

These responses are automatic and intense. And not only toward one another but within ourselves as “dependability” and “productivity” are our own natural inherited traits and ability.

My spiritual clan and our family tree are completely aware of every and all inside and outside things that are associated with the happenings of this life and can concurrently manage through any type of barrier.

I have confidence in them and their wisdom. They have proved so much to me time and again, upholding everything together and sharing with me a lot of hidden knowledge.

The loas are powerful supernatural beings greatly differing in force yet not so foreign from us in attitude and reaction. They have dispositions that are very similar to humans.

My departed loved ones who lived as strong authentic yoruba priestesses in their day an age work harmoniously in accordance with the loas.

Other noble relatives of mine who weren’t involved in the priesthood serve their purpose through various means of devotion.

And all of them are highly venerated. I am just as devoted to them as they are to me. All of my good ancestors, and the specific loas that are attached to me, are the loves of my life.

My ancestors and orishas have always had my back in what seemed like the most chaotic of times. Nothing was ever too big or too small for them all to handle. And I was always important enough to gain their solicitous and undivided attention.

That is what is so fabulous about the universe. It has the ultimate power to simultaneously preserve any situation at any time with anyone and anything.

My spiritual clan and our family tree know more about what I am capable of-than I do myself. And the overwhelming love and faith that they have in me is priceless/ irreplaceable.

The spiritual connections that cling around me and the energies that surround us are my greatest motivators and inspirers.

What Is Truth?

Truth is information that excludes what is false, anything which is not a fact.

And one person’s fact can be another person’s fiction depending on what level of knowledge and experience they may have.

Some individuals do not want to hear truth because they cannot handle the truth.

Reality can be hard for some to deal with if what they are facing causes them pain or disadvantage. To many individuals, the truth does hurt and may often turn out to be unbearable as each individual is different.

To me, truth is what sustains me. I am it and it is me. That is just the way that my life is programmed. Honesty and sincerity is a part of my foundation as it serves as a refuge and protection.

Truth is a place where I can run to, find security in, and relax without dismay whenever I am under attack or misunderstanding.

The truth actually does set one free in times of trouble and panic due to the fact of conscience, mentality, and disposition.

Attitudes and perspectives play a large role in the reactions to approach what is justifiable-meaning that truth has the ability to be looked at through distinct ways.

Very few individuals will constantly see things in the exact same light, even though they can be involved in a situation together both experiencing circumstances with one another.

While the ones at hand may be physically together their minds could be further apart-one comprehending something that the other is not even contemplating. And as a result if not worked out thoroughly with the resources of mediation and considerate communication, relationships or acquaintances are bound to lead into confusion and resentment.

What about lies? Some individuals believe their own lies. Do lies become the truth? Yes, to the weak-minded ones who allow the devious to get the best of them by being insecure and tearing down their spirit with taunts of malicious untruths.

Everybody tells lies, many will argue. Yes, that is also true. Yet there is a vast difference between “white lies” and full blown intentional, pathological, habitual, and compulsive lies.

There are plenty of genuine upstanding truly loyal people in the world who have their dignity and integrity and who will not compromise their standards for anyone or anything regardless of consequences.

There is no harm in telling a white lie to save one’s life or because you do not want to be bothered and so on.

When certain people lie (plain out just big deceitful lies) and get caught up in their deception they may run away and hide, deny, or make up excuses. Some will even go as far as to cling on to their dishonesty, steadfastly swearing by them as veritable.

Individuals need to accurately discern and decide for themselves what truth is and what the truth means to them in their lives and how they are affected by it.

And in doing so, while assimilating every aspect, one has to be careful that in finding the factors wherein about truth-they don’t get caught up in a bind of ultimately lying to themselves.

My Golden Girl

I have a pretty labrador/ golden retriever that I adopted from north shore animal league back in September of this year. She is a nice cream color. I named her lailah. She was eight weeks old at the time and so very smart. Already she was paper trained and knew what it meant to give a kiss. She shows gratitude when we clean up behind her and feed her. She is very feisty, gives much attitude and I just love her!

Lailah is four months now. She jumps into my bed to sleep with me every night even though she has her own pillow bed.

Twenty-six years ago I adopted a shepherd/collie from north shore and she was amazing, a very special dog with psychic ability. I was told by a family member that I would never get another dog like her within my lifetime, that I may get something close to what she was. And I know that no dog will ever compare to Brandie or take her place and they don’t have to because she’s still around in the spirit realm we have visits in my dreams.

Lailah does come close. When I got Brandie she was seven weeks and I had seen her potential which proved me right later on down the road. Shortly after I brought lailah home I detected she was a spiritual puppy. She confirmed it the day after yesterday morning in front of us all as she fiercely stared, barked and sniffed at an apparition. I’ve been blessed again with a pup designed just for me.

Most dogs are special and those who have a little something extra should be treasured

I feed lailah the best. I give her Purina one/puppychow/beneful/one step beyond. I give her a little table food from time to time but not so much that she will stop eating her puppy food. And a few months ago I went on the pedigree website printed out a form for recently adopting a new puppy. They sent me two coupons. One for a twenty-pound bag of food and one for four cans of food. A whole month’s supply of free puppy food sure came in handy!

Asexuality/Asexual And Proud

I, LaToya Lawrence knew that i was Asexual ever since i was a young teenager, and i am so very proud to be that way as others are.  There are many people in this society who are ignorant to exactly what being Asexual means. To those who have no knowledge about it, some knowledge to it, or who are just plain interested in learning or learning more about the subject i have posted the accurate truth!  I copied the following article for review:

Asexual People – No Sex Please!

What is Asexual? Define Asexual and Asexuality

As a teenager, Cijay Morgan couldn’t understand the fuss her friends made over dating and boys. “My friends were pairing off and talking about crushes on movie stars, and I just didn’t get it,” remembers Morgan, now 42. As an adult, her dating life always stalled because she had absolutely no interest in a physical relationship.

Then, a few years ago, Morgan stumbled across an online community of people who defined themselves as asexual, meaning that they did not experience sexual attraction. “It was absolutely liberating, like bells ringing and doors opening,” she says. “I felt like going up to everybody and saying, ‘There’s a word for me!’”

According to a surprising new study, one in 100 adults has no interest in sex. And as awareness grows, more and more people, like Morgan, feel comfortable proudly identifying as asexual. Although they don’t want to bond between the sheets, many of them do want to fall in love or find a life partner. But in a world where sex can seem all-important, dating and relationships pose special challenges for them.

Is Asexuality Common?

While illness, depression, or certain medications can cause a temporary drop in sex drive or arousal, people who consider themselves asexual say their lack of interest in sex is a permanent part of their identity. “The biggest misconceptions are that something bad happened to make us this way, and that we can be fixed, or even want to be fixed,” Morgan says.

A recent study suggests that asexuality may be surprisingly common. Of the study’s more than 18,000 participants, one percent said they agreed with the statement, “I have never felt sexually attracted to anyone at all.”

As with any sexual orientation, what’s considered “asexual” ranges widely, and there’s a huge variety in the experiences of people who identify as asexual. “A lot of [asexuals] have had some sexual interest at one point in their lives,” says study author Anthony Bogaert, a professor at Brock University in St. Catherines, Ontario.

Love without sex

But just because someone isn’t interested in sex doesn’t mean they’re not interested in love. While some are happiest alone, asexual people can feel romantic attraction and have intimate relationships. They may like to cuddle and be physically close to others. Some get married and even have children. (In Bogaert’s study, 33 percent of asexuals were currently married or living with a partner.) “When it works, it’s not about the sex you’re not having, it’s about all the other things you share together,” says David Jay, 22, who’s known he was asexual since his early teens.

The challenge, of course, is finding a partner who either has a similar lack of interest in sex or can compromise. If you’re asexual, it’s important to get that out in the open early on, says Tina Tessina, Ph.D., a psychotherapist and author of The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again. She points out that the topic of what you’re looking for in a relationship often comes up during the early stages of dating, and that can provide an opening to say something like, “You should know that I’m not very interested in sex.” “Sex is an expected component of dating these days,” she says. “If you’re truly asexual, you need to let people know that. And if it’s going to chase someone away, so be it—why would you want to hold on to someone who’s not right for you?”

Norman, 20, got to know his current love interest online before breaking the news. “I just braced myself and said, ‘There’s something I have to tell you: I’m asexual,’” he says. Luckily, there was enough interest on both sides that the two are trying to make the relationship work, despite their sexual differences.

Bridging the sexual gap

What if you’re already in a relationship and you think you or your partner may be asexual? “If one of you isn’t responding to sexual overtures, or is constantly putting the other off or avoiding situations that could turn sexual, that’s the indication that something is going on and you have to talk about it,” Tessina says.

To do so, sit down in a calm moment, outside the bedroom, Tessina says. Then open by saying, “I realize that you’re feeling frustrated and that I’m not responding sexually to you as much as you like,” or “I’m feeling frustrated and you’re not responding sexually to me as much as I’d like.” Ask your partner how he or she feels, then give him or her a couple of minutes to talk, without interrupting. If you know or suspect that you’re asexual, say so, but be sure to tell your partner, “I care about you, and this isn’t a personal rejection; I just don’t have an interest in sex.”

Finally, talk about possible compromises. Some asexual people do have sex to make their partners happy, while others can’t tolerate it at all. These couples need to invest in lots of frank communication, as Norman and his partner are doing, knowing the right balance will come with time. His advice to other couples in the same boat? “Talk it through with your partner and find a middle ground. Neither one of you can bend all the way to one extreme. Only the two of you can decide what the right compromise is for you.”

For more information on asexuality, visit the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN) at http://www.asexuality.org.

Article by: Jeannie Kim, a New York-based writer and editor who writes frequently on relationship and health issues.

Why Some Men In Particular Cheat On Their Lover

Everyone is an individual so there are a number of reasons why certain men cheat. Nevertheless, one major reason some are unfaithful and run from woman to woman is due to them not being sexually satisfied the way that they want to be.

And exactly what i mean by that is when it comes to a woman’s vagina.

What is general knowledge as well as common sense is knowing that anything continuously in use for a very long period of time will eventually give way and lose it’s durability. And it is just the same with a woman’s vagina.

Some women are just sexually worn out.

Giving birth to children will also stretch a woman to such an extent, especially if she’s having children over an over. Some women don’t even give their bodies enough time to heal after childbirth before they become intimate again.

A lot of men get very disappointed when they have sex with a woman only to find out that she is loose. Men and women who’ve been in relationships for years have even experienced this great disappointment.

There are certain women who for a while now have been going to doctors to surgically get their virginity back.

They spend loads of money to tighten back up their vaginal muscles in order for them and their partner to experience the sensations of pleasurable sex.

It is indeed true with some. The tighter the better.

That is one of the reasons some men seek out virgins. Pertaining to those on that particular level, aside from the macho crap of being the first to “deflower” a female only to satisfy their own pathetic ego.

The other reason is because a virgin vagina provides a man with the ultimate sensation since it has never been in use before.

Incest

Wednesday, February 22, 2006 at 10:14 PM EST

This is definitely a world full of sick people. Some are born sick and some become sick. There are a number of reasons why certain people are emotionally scarred or mentally deranged, and incest is one of them.

Years ago, i heard about a neighbor who came out telling people on my block about how her sister was sleeping with one of their brothers. I personally know people who’ve had intercourse with their blood relatives. One of my aunts married a man who admitted to sleeping with his sister and brother.

I know a man who slept with his first cousin and fathered three children by her. I also know a man who told me as well as others, that his wife was sleeping with their own son. And, another aunt of mine’s lesbian lover claimed that she was raped by her father and supposedly conceived a child with him.

All of these people i’ve spoken of are deeply disturbed in one way or another. There are circumstances where some may have escaped the mental consequences through engaging in incest.

There are all types of people. But most who willingly continue to indulge in a sexual relationship with a blood relative are indeed sick and act out in precarious ways. That is why it is very important to find out a person’s background these days. So much is happening. Sometimes you can’t trust nobody, even the people you think you know!

 

Post Tags: Life, Sex, Sick People

Post Comment (1) Comments

i know thats is soooo sick….ughhhhh!!!!!

Posted by Sorcha on Thursday, February 23, 2006 6:46 AM EST

Male/Female Gal Pals

Wednesday, February 08, 2006 at 2:24 PM EST

I know males that want to hang around females not to get into their panties but to just remain good friends because they enjoy one another’s company and that is normal. But you have some who don’t get too close to a female because of what their male buddies may think.

Some guys feel that if a guy hangs around a female all the time and even spends money on her without getting any sex from her he’s a punk or he shouldn’t be around her.

That makes no sense to me but that’s just my point of view. Before you’re a male or a female you are a human being so what does gender have to do with how you regard someone in a friendship?

 

 

Post Tags: Friends, Life

Post Comment (2) Comments

Well honestly i don’t have any male friends, though i have male classmates, schoolmats, or relatives. I hope when i start working, i will make friends with some guys.

Posted by amber on Friday, March 24, 2006 11:56 PM EST

I totally agree with what you are saying. Some of my best friends are guys. It shouldn’t matter what gender your friends are as long as they are good friends. I know alot of people, even guys, who think that having friends of the opposite gender is a good thing becuase you can get into the mind of the other gender.

Posted by Jenni Leigh on Wednesday, February 08, 2006 4:35 PM EST

Knucklehead Men

Wednesday, February 08, 2006 at 2:11 PM EST
I’m a nice-looking woman but i don’t understand why knucklehead men continue to try to talk to me. They should be able to look at me and see that they don’t stand a chance. They’re undesirable and i don’t even mess around with men anyway.

Men have always been the easiest thing for me to stay away from. “All men are not the same” or, ” have you been in a bad relationship?” Is what some have said and asked me after hearing how i feel about men. And it has nothing to do with either one. I know that all men aren’t the same and that there are good nice men out there i just naturally don’t want to be with one and i’m tired of hearing about it.

“Why you don’t get married?” “You should be married”. What is the big deal with these people? I don’t need a man! They don’t do anything for me. I’m not telling them not to be with a man, i don’t care what people do with their life. Why be worried about me? I’ve never been in a bad romantic relationship because i never had any feelings for a man. I’ve seen other’s around me who were in relationships and i don’t understand it. When they find out their man is cheating they go crazy, i couldn’t care less where a man sticks his penis, how would it hurt me? His body doesn’t belong to me.

And these knucklehead men, you can tell them that you don’t want them and they push themselves on you anyway. Some of them like a challenge or they’re just plain sick because to get back at you and to impress their stupid friends they’ll sometimes say they had you! They use other women to try an make you jealous and you don’t even want them, or women who do want them they try to use you to make them jealous-a bunch of silly shit. And these be full grown men!

More than once i’ve watched guys profile in front of me, trying to make me have a crush on them, and some thinking if they get me i’ll fall all over them. Bullshit! That will never happen. Not in a million years. Can’t no penis take my mind. I know a girl on my block who got sexually whipped by a guy and he married her and got her eating out of his hand. He cheats on her too.

I can’t count how many male associates who were in relationships with women that told me what they be doing behind their girlfriends back. And some women are so stupid they won’t even believe it, they’ll get mad at you for telling them and their man will deny it ,of course, and make you out to be the bad person. But i never got involve with that.

I have a relative who loves to watch the Maury show and Jerry Springer, and almost every day it’s the same ole thing. Somebody fighting over somebody else’s man or woman, and women crying because they don’t know who their baby’s daddy is or because the man don’t want to take care of the child.

If i had a baby it darn sure wouldn’t matter to me if the man didn’t want to be there. I don’t understand none of that nonsense. I couldn’t sit up and watch them kind of shows every day. There are knucklehead women out there too who won’t leave men who don’t want to be bothered alone but when it comes to a man it’s a little worse because they have those pathetic egos.

Older/Younger/Men/Women

Sunday, April 16, 2006 at 2:13 PM EDT

There are all types of people who have their own different motives for why they do things. It is no secret that people sometimes use people to gain their own satisfaction. And that can go for any particular category in life. Men and women will always seek out one another whether their intentions are sincere or deceiving no matter what age. It will also happen in friendships, families, and in business.

Age is nothing but a number to many but to certain older people it is an advantage over someone who they feel is less experienced. It’s true that in this particular day and age younger people are much more exposed to what’s going on in the world more now than ever! But there will always be someone older who’ll seek out a younger person who they can or who they may think they can mold, manipulate, and control.

It works either way too, you know! There are young ones out there who prey on the older generation, putting fear into them and playing with their heads. It all depends on the level a person is on.

The only reason some younger men date older women is to use them for their money. I’ve seen it quite often. They’ll sleep with them then have younger girls that they’re truly interested in on the side. The older women sometimes have been in so many bad relationships with men their own age that they’re looking for someone to train or satisfy them sexually.

And, the only reason some older men date younger women is because they believe that most of them are naive and will fall for the bullshit they’re unable to pull off on a woman of their own age group. And also because a younger woman’s vagina may be more tighter than an older woman’s.

Then, just like some guys, younger women tend to date older men to use them for their money. Things don’t always work out as planned because every young person is not naive an inexperienced in the way that some may think. I’m a thirty year old person but when i was in my teens i was nowhere near stupid or uninformed! And part of my knowledge as to being so young came from the environment that i grew up in.

In a few instances it can and has worked out for people with wide gaps between their ages in romantic relationships. When you really think about it though why would you want to be intimate with someone who is around your father and mother’s age? Isn’t that kind of disgusting? To each his or her own but when it comes to a twenty and a fifty year old going to bed with a twelve year old that is pretty sick!

So-Called Cheating

Wednesday, March 15, 2006 at 7:50 PM EST

I see some people go crazy when they find out that someone who is suppose to be their lover is fooling around on them, especially women. They may get hurt emotionally then they’re ready to go fight the other person, or take vengeance out on their lover.

The way i see it is if two people are not married and one of them decides that they want to have sex with somebody else and does it’s not cheating. Marriage is where a commitment comes in and if one is not married they are free to do what they want to do.

Some people set their own self up for disappointment expecting more than what they should. If a person is not married to you they are not obligated to stay faithful that’s the whole point of not being married-having your freedom!

So many people claim they get hurt or jealous if someone they’re interested in talks to or is messing around with somebody else. There have been men who were interested in me who i didn’t even want and they’d get jealous of other men who’d just be talking to me and i don’t know what for.

I don’t belong to anybody but myself. That was purely their problem, their own insecurity. And that turned me off.

Some people even use sex as their weapon cheating on someone to get back at somebody else. I don’t understand people trying to hurt other people through sex, those are other people’s parts and they are the ones risking getting nasty diseases.

How does what others do with their genitals affect the other person unless they let it. I don’t know, maybe it has no logic to me because i’m not into men and couldn’t care less what a man does with his penis.

 

 

Post Comment (1) Comments

Everyone has different ideas of what committment is. Probably the important thing is for both parties to be very clear about what they expect. There are plenty of people in committed relationships who are not married, but who are willing to give and expect to receive the same degree of courtesy, respect, and fidelity that is implied (although often not observed) in marriage. I think the mistake many women make is not being clear about their expectations. One very good reason to expect sexual fidelity is the risk of sexually transmitted disease. Herpes and other exciting things can be shared by just kissing; in many ways there is no such thing as “safe sex.” I’m a guy, and I would be upset for that reason alone if a woman I were with was sleeping with other men and not being honest about it.

Posted by David Rochester on Sunday, May 14, 2006 1:43 PM EDT