Our minds are a place where we store and collect. Where we deliberate and rationalize.
It is also a place where impressions materialize.
Reminders of events depicted within visionary, auditory or conceptual representation.
Our reflection of memories.
Indelibly painted imprints and images embedded in the brain.
Somethings are forgotten. Some things are remembered as clearly as day.
Sometimes what was totally forgotten can be triggered by something to be recalled again in an instant.
Some memories of things or events become cloudy or totally forgotten to never emerge from the fog of forgetfulness.
Memories that reflect to us are a great benefit bestowed to us upon nature. A blessing to our well-being.
Good, bad, and neutral memories serve to assist within our review, study, attest, and mirror of what we experience and consciously, unconsciously, or subconsciously absorb. –latoya lawrence
Small-minded, ignorant, or narrow-minded people form judgements, speculations or assumptions about others or situations based on their own generalizations, speculations, insecurities or unproven conjectures.
People who are on the level or who have open minds that are broad within a wise/objective/reasoned way of analytical thought process know and respect the vast array of human distinction.
They make judgements or considerations based on another person’s own individuality. Not based on preconceived notions, the typical familiarity of common reactions, behaviors, feelings or mindsets.
Great minds are fully aware of the absolute and possibility thereof when it comes to the diversity within nature and flourishing/development within unique human beings. –latoya lawrence
I remember in my teenage years and in my early adulthood how I viewed life as nothing.
To me, it still is nothing but at the same time it is something meaningful that means nothing.
I spend and have spent days/years just killing time as I never cared about this world, yet I have had to always keep going on account of a God that has me here for purposes of his own that I do not delight in at all.
Yes, I have no problem coping with or managing this life as my life has shown and proved that I can handle anything. The problem is this life in the present world is unnatural to a natural way that life should be.
A lot of what is deemed normal is not normal.
Why did this plan have to include me? With all the people God created why drag me into this ridiculous shit that has nothing to do with me?
I have been blessed but these certain anointings have never been enough to make living here in the world with all the dumb shit and shit I could care less about worth my while.
I was always ahead of my time and pissed off because God put me here- feeling that I did not belong here and deserved better.
God claims to love but what kind of love would bring me to a place that I despise?
He gave me and gave certain others knowledge but what is the purpose of knowing things when we have no real control over anything and no guarantees in life but to one day die?
Are we just to know that no matter what we have experienced and possess through seasons of happiness and hardships we are still just mere dust that can be blown away at any time?
When I look back at a lot of life that has passed by, I really do not see the point or the purpose in the things I have gone through or encountered.
Most of the things I know now I already knew back when I was much younger.
Many things that excite and that are looked upon as significant to others are not appealing or anything relevant to me.
I did not need to witness or observe accounts of what I considered to be sick shit among other people -or to be successfully delivered through undesirable trials and tribulations- to know or to understand God’s power as I have.
To me, God’s force was always evident. But I was made to be an individual put into a world just like everyone else to undergo inevitable life situations.
What is the point of being in the world if one is truly not of it even if they are born into imperfection?
My resentment in the past for God came from my perceived view of his character and I still hold a little resentment toward him as I do not appreciate things about him that I do not understand as to his reasons why he lets things in life be.
Nevertheless, it is what it is.
I have been tired of this fucked up world since my teenage years yet still strong enough to endure every moment of it.
Sorry, (And I am not apologetic for speaking the truth) but from my observation some so called Christians strike me as rejects who do not know how to think for themselves.
They sound like wind up dolls who repeat doctrine like hypnotized puppets/flunkies.
I believe in God and know scripture; however, I am not, never was, and never will be the type to bow down to a way of thinking, speaking, or doing by being trained from the instruction or psychology that does not relate to my knowledgeable consciousness of vibration.
My identity can never be taken away by religious, societal or familiar influence held by those who do not challenge what does not pertain to or apply to all.
Some individuals have no backbone.
I could not remain at peace if I was not able to be my true self in mind and within attitude.
Asshole still will not move on. He is such a pathetic piece of trash/shit.
And while there are women out there who are indeed whores sex is not a tool or action that can be used against a woman to determine her worth or lower her value.
As he is only able to obtain skanks and shack up with his main skank do not get mad at me for loving myself and having high standards.
This Latin nigger is funny. He think he can drive me crazy with burning candles and shit.
He is very lucky I do not call upon my Orishas anymore. Elegba, Ogun, Orunmila, Oshun and Ochosi would have destroyed his ass!
Asshole did not know I was born with the power of a priestess.
I leave everything to God. Give people enough rope they eventually hang themselves.
Why do I attract some of the most ill fuckers who should have known beforehand that they never stood a chance with me?
They could have saved themselves the wasted effort and self-humiliation of being exposed by one who can literally “read” them.
Voodoo/Black Magic/WitchcraftDoes Not Work On Me! The Negativity Does Not Take Affect! My Mind Cannot Be Influenced Or Manipulated By Bullshit. Get That Through Your Fucking Head- Retard!
I have never been hurt mentally or emotionally by any man and I never will be.
To me, a man is nothing to get hurt over.
I am not and never have been the type of girl/lady/woman/female that a man could use or take advantage of I was not wired that way.
I was never weak, docile or naive when it came to men.
I was born with that extra sensory perception, strong spirit of discernment and unconventional individuality that made me unique in my own way.
Of course, anyone can lie and make up stories to tarnish or downgrade someone’s reputation, but no one can ruin anyone unless they allow them to.
Women who share my likeness know when a man means absolutely nothing to her that their petty words and tall tales will not do shit to disturb or affect her.
A reputation is only what people think or believe one to be- character is what truly defines one.
There were and are negative people with a low-mindset- till this day- still jealous of me because I have never been dogged out by any man.
If I were to have had sex with anyone it would have been on my terms and not because of any smooth talk or whatever “game” a man thought he had to use to pull or play a woman.
Like I have said many times before there are women who use men just like some of them use women- they just use one another with no attachment or feelings involved.
There are women who use men for sperm, and it is not about the sex. I know personally a man could never do anything for me sexually.
Unfortunately, sex is the only way to make a baby unless one has the thousands of dollars it takes to go through numerous procedures of invitro fertilization.
A woman does not need a man for sexual pleasure. Women have clitorises they can stimulate and climax with. The instance is perfectly normal and healthy for them to self-explore and know their body.
Of course, every man is not out to hurt, use, deceive, or disgrace a woman when she does not cater to his ego.
There are good, mature, men out there with sense who do not even entertain or possess these certain mindsets/attitudes.
A lot of narcissistic men have deep-rooted psychological and insecurity issues.
Many of them are the way they are on account of their mothers fucking their heads up in the process while they were being raised.
Some of them were not correctly informed by mommy about the diversity within life or some of them were spoiled by mommy in a bad way.
Mommy enabled them and boosted them up in an unrealistic fashion that when they enter the real world to encounter women of substance they cannot cope with the reality.
In other circumstances mommy did not give some of them the love and attention they needed.
In a world where impressions matter to many, truths are what truly mattered to me.
Not projecting a facade of what is acceptable for the sake of being accepted.
I found it impossible for me to put on a disguise as I am not one to be a people pleaser.
There is a time for courtesy, professionalism, diplomacy, and respecting certain boundaries as well as a time when to justifiably cross them.
It is so important to live out one’s truth even if that genuineness and loyalty to self within self-preservation according to one’s own distinct nature causes a reproach within others due to what goes beyond their own comprehension and/or level of discernment.
I have been lied upon, misunderstood, judged for things I have never done, criticized for not being able to be controlled by others, and I have been the object of other people’s vicious gossip, envy and jealousy just like many other people of substance in life have.
All other people’s negativity did was cause me to become further resilient and despise and look down upon these individuals more than I already had beforehand.
As one who is extremely stubborn no one can make me do anything I do not want to do, and no one can stop me from doing anything that I want to do.
I have noticed an innate force within me that refused to allow me to be deterred from possessing the essential liberty that is instilled within me to express and prevail.
I was naturally inspired to continue to move forward unaffected.
Permitting others, the opportunity to dictate or restrict one’s path and future out of fear/intimidation or discouragement only prevents one’s celestial discovery, steady growth, and ultimate evolution.
There are people who often recognize or acknowledge some of us for who they want us to be instead of who we really are.
They form judgements or have preconceived notions based on generalized perceptions of what they believe we represent through our perceived lifestyle, words, or manner of bearing in which we conduct ourselves.
Some conclusions that others draw may be accurate, partially accurate or just plain wrong altogether.
One cannot be genuinely defined according to conjecture, hearsay, rumor, false assumption or a standard of what one is familiar with and/or accustomed to.
So many factors, shape, make up and contribute to diverse individuals and their behavior.
As soon as one behaves or responds contrary to another person’s sense of belief or reasoning, they may become shocked, disappointed, or even critical toward the other person.
This instance is not an illustration that the people or person in question necessarily did something wrong or acted out of character. It is an example of others whose expectation or notion of what they built up within their own way of thinking projecting upon the surface.
I experienced a long time ago (from my childhood on up) how people would put their own insecurities, ignorance, and negativity onto me and others who they differed from or were jealous towards.
I without a doubt knew that their judgment or lack thereof did not coincide with reality.
Their actions and behavior reflected themselves, who they truly were, and had absolutely nothing to do with me!
I had seen previews for Lee Daniels 2023 BET horror/thriller movie “The Reading” starring Mo’Nique last week.
The first time I saw one of the coming attractions I did not think much of the film- not really paying too much attention to it.
The second time I saw a commercial for The Reading it struck me as eerily spooky.
The BET television premiere for the film is set to air on March 14, 2023, but I did not want to wait that long.
So, after midnight this morning I watched The Reading on Amazon Prime- and I was not at all disappointed.
I loved the way the movie started off. It was intense and did not waste a moment to delve into the story.
Around the middle of the film there was a shocking, unexpected twist that threw me off.
I thought it was going to be a spirit haunting type of movie with something going wrong through the spirit-medium who gave the chilling psychic readings.
I was ready to lightheartedly fear what I thought may come about. Everything was getting so freaky and exciting!
Even though the film went in another direction it was still entertaining.
The Reading was action-packed, full of suspense, and ruthlessly gore with Mo’Nique’s character.
I loved that the movie depicted an African American girl with genuine clairvoyant/psychic ability (the woman played her part well as well as all the other actors and actresses) because we do exist, and we are out here in the world.
Race or ethnicity has nothing to do with one being born with preternatural ability, yet we rarely see people of color who possess these gifts shown in the media unless it is a portrayal of some stereotypical voodoo shit!
When people think of assault or murder it is usually through the methods of stabbing, shooting, strangling, knocking one out through blunt force trauma, substance/chemical poisoning, and so on.
But voodoo/black magic/witchcraft by tampering to influence or harm people, and the intentional sexual pollutants of bodily fluids are also disgusting forms of crime inflicted on other individuals.
HIV/AIDS has come a long way since originally hitting the scene to become widely known from the late seventies to the early eighties.
There are advanced anti-viral drugs on the market to lower viral load to the point of it almost becoming undetectable or non-detectable considering intercourse with an infected person to be so-called safe sex.
There are plenty of other diseases out there that are transmitted through sexual contact and some venereal diseases that can be caught without having sexual contact with anyone at all.
The problem is not with the diseases themselves but with scandalous people who know they are infected with disease and knowingly pass them on to others freely without any concern or decency.
Some people will intentionally spread their infections out of bitterness with the attitude of “I am dying so I will take others with me”.
People have different reactions and motives for why they do things.
Some just do not care.
Some think if they spread their disease to a person or people that they give the disease to these people will have to stay with them or within their sexual circle (which fittingly does not always transpire).
Some just want others to be in their shoes so that they do not feel alone or awkward within their situation, making the circumstance less uncomfortable within their bearings.
All I can say is that this is a wild dangerous world with a lot of highly disturbed, treacherous, ruthless and just plain immoral people.
There are also plenty of highly upstanding, good-natured, trustworthy and humane people out there in our world.
If people with sense continue to love and respect themselves and be cautious to thoroughly detect who or what they let into their bodies just as one would with any stranger or foreign object that they would let into their home.
Do not let anyone enter without the proper “checks”. Do not let them check in if they do not correctly check out!
The home decor style of the 60’s and 70’s were not just for hippies and gypsy fortune tellers.
Whether one called them door beads or beaded curtains- bead adornments that decorated the entrances of doorway rooms in the home and within establishments offered a cozy and enchanting ambience to settings that a lot of individuals could appreciate.
I remember as a young child during the late seventies and early eighties, walking through the clear-colored beads that hung from my home, clasping them open, loving the sounds they made while they hit up against one another.
People had many a variety of these beaded curtains.
Some of the people in my neighborhood (next door, across the street, down the block, and blocks away neighbors) had the attractive wooden kind.
Some had bright multicolored ones, and some had ones that were designed in diamond/oval shapes.
Door beads/beaded curtains are a creative way to add character and beauty into a place of residence or business.
The thought also brings to me a wonderful sense of nostalgia to what once was.
There are modern door beads and beaded curtains to decorate our homes with nowadays, but nothing will compare to the essence that held at a time when this style expressed the decade.
I am not going to mention any names but he knows who he is.
Since around Sunday on February 5, 2023 I noticed a few love/attraction/ lust spells tried to be worked upon me.
It began with acknowledgement of the man lusting after me -sexually desiring me- with the attempt to also get me to have a sexual as well as physical attraction to this guy.
Then I began to receive messages that this guy likes me very much.
In the days following, the essence of the love spell relayed to me the other feelings that are intended to sway me.
The motive is to have me like, care for, and possibly fall in love with this guy so I will be drawn to him.
I guess he thinks if he can make me feel this way that I will jump into bed with him.
He thinks that if I have sex with him because of the love spell then walk away from me afterwards that I will somehow be hurt emotionally.
This would be his way of retaliating against me for rejecting him by using an “unnatural” method (love-magic/witchcraft).
I understand that he or his ego may be hurt but witchcraft/black magic/voodoo does not and never has worked on me mentally or emotionally I am far too strong for that.
I am sensitive to energy so I can pick up on the essence and the intent.
I do not understand why some guys have the mentality that they can hurt women by using them for sex.
Every woman is not the same and they do not hold the mentality of being disgraced by negative men who try to humiliate and degrade them in that manner.
There are women who use men for sex too and do not care.
He probably believes in his ignorant mind that I would be hurt the most because I am not the type who goes to bed with anyone at all. So, if he sleeps with me by doing witchcraft then talks badly about me with lies and whatever other stupid games he would be avenged.
He is sick in my opinion.
Love spells should not be done at all- but if they are done- at least people should do them with good/honest intentions instead of selfish ones that intend to hurt others just to have one’s way with them.
Aside from all that, witchcraft/black magic/voodoo is real even if certain people do not believe that it works.
The supernatural instance does not affect everyone but a lot of people do become under the influence of it. If witchcraft/black magic/voodoo does not work on a person mentally, emotionally or physically it can work on them spiritually or materially- through finances and other means.
No matter what, God is always stronger than the devil that is why I am continuously kept aware. I am so grateful and thankful to the Lord for looking out and keeping me protected.
I remember years ago another guy worked a love spell on me to try to get me to love, marry him, and have babies with him.
I do not like people who do these things with ulterior motives to suit themselves, especially against another person’s will.
Why want someone who does not want you back? There is a world full of people on the planet.
What is important is that for people who are interested in relationships to find one’s who are best suited for them.
Right now, with the current guy, I find this action of his kind of exciting as I wonder how much further he will go. I even have a smile on my face at this love spell.
I am a fierce spiritual warrior and I am ready for the battle that God will take care of!
I was told twice yesterday by a mature (ninety-five year old) woman of experience that because of the way I look physically, and the way that I carry myself, I should be in movies.
This is not the first time I have been told these words and similar ones alike.
As a teen and young adult, some people would ask me if I was a model and would tell me that I could be one.
Another person told me they saw me as a movie actress type who was supposed to be writing screenplays.
Aside from other things, I could have been a lawyer or a psychologist if I had really wanted and chose to. I have both the smarts and the mindset.
The fact is, I never wanted a life in Hollywood to be broadcast on television, or to be photographed for magazines walking down the runway.
I never had the desire to be a legal representative or mental health specialist either.
Though many of us are qualified or can do or become professionals in more than one area, it does not mean this is a preferred career or path to seek.
Jobs and job labels do not define us as individuals.
Even though there are narrow-minded misinformed people who believe the higher the title or higher the income, the higher the stature.
Someone who does not have a job or who has a job that is considered low rank in comparison to high-level/high-profile jobs can have far more integrity, intelligence, ability than the one touting their so-called credentials.
They may have just not gotten the right opportunity, could have fallen into hard times, did not believe enough within themselves or did not have any support.
There are several reasons and factors for why those who could achieve great heights do not.
A lot of people who are in positions of power or who hold positions that are praised within society are not as adequate as they think they are or would like to believe.
Many of them are nothing but shit! They are as common as they come- there is nothing special about their existence.
Novel within character and mindset unlike the ordinary are what define true standing within its authenticity.
I like the shoes that I walk in. They fit me just fine. Sure, there are other pairs on display I can try on, but they would eventually get raggedy to wear out as they all come a dime a dozen.
The shoes on my feet are especially made for me. There are no other duplicates for anyone else to see. These shoes stand the test of time, they are worth much more than a cheap dime.
They are waterproof, hole-proof, and heel-proof. The proof is in the damage-proof that proved the resiliency in my walk.
I have come a long way in my shoes.
No matter whatever came to be I always kept moving forward never to slide back. The motor in my body never allowed me to be immobile.
The sole of the fabric tells it all, my foot imprinted.
I made a mark- nobody can walk in my shoes as I have without the scratches, scrapes and shitloads of crap not showing upon the surface.
We all have our ups and downs here and there depending on what each of us individuals consider or define as minor or major bumps in the road of our journey here on earth.
But for the most part life has treated me kindly. I have been fortunate in many areas of travel throughout the interesting ride of this physical plane.
I have noticed since my early youth that if there was something in life that I did not want then the circumstance was not going to work out for the best- or at all.
I cannot have anyone, or any situation persuaded, or forced upon me.
I am too headstrong to be influenced by what others may try to impose on me.
When things in life I desired were granted to me or attained by my own accomplishing the circumstance always worked out favorably with long-lasting rewards.
I determine my happiness not what other people define what happiness is according to their standards or perception of what meets the requirements of a happy or content life condition.
Only I know the true source and components needed to define the attributes of my own fulfillment.
It is wonderful to have spiritual gifts. To be able to see and feel in to the unknown.
To have accurate dreams and visions of beyond where I preternaturally interact within the supernatural.
It is what I am.
By birth, I have one footstep here into this physical plane while my other foot is stepped out inside the spiritual realm.
I am partially experiencing both worlds and whole-heartedly Intune to both.
I am here, but not here.
There have been mysteries revealed to me, spiritual essences revealed to me, revelations revealed to me.
I have a lot of wisdom, knowledge, and understanding flowing around inside of me.
God my creator remains with me.
I can tell God anything. He totally understands me. I am completely straight with him; I always have been.
The good, the bad, and the ugly- I have never been shy or afraid to speak my words of truth to God.
No matter what. God always comes through for me. He speaks back to me in so many ways including through nature.
Everything is made up of energy. We are all energy. The energy made up by my nature is the way that God designed me to be.
Whether I have a complaint, or just feeling my joy, God is there with his open-arms, extraordinary comprehension and incredible forces of power to aid, advise, and to protect.
No matter what may go on or happen in general in life- may it be through unexpected events or whatever else- I know that everything will be alright and will turn out in my favor as it always has since the days of my youth.
From my observations throughout the years there are so-called Christians and others alike who believe if something is not written or mentioned within the Bible then the instance is unlikely to be true or not possible- which I know for fact has never been the truth.
Something does not have to be in the Bible for it to be truthful or possible.
Everything not written in the Bible that can occur is also not always devil inspired or people inspired either.
There is credibility to many situations, circumstances, encounters that were experiences not directly included as taken place in the Bible.
Some people are stuck in their limited scope of reasoning, narrow-mindedness, ignorance, brainwashing, or influences brought on by society.
That is why it is so important to be strong-minded and confident within one’s own.
Knowing while certain others may not share an experience or a belief in no way will make another’s experience or belief less probable. There is a great possibility for their undergoing to be a reality and able to exist.
I have always been headstrong. I do not have to go through something to believe or to know it is able to be true for someone else.
Maybe because I have that insight, nevertheless, one should never let others sway their minds or raise doubt in what they hold to know or believe firmly.
Of course, we as people are liable to hold onto false or erroneous ways of being.
Anyone can misinterpret or be mistaken about things it is when they fail to accept their error once they have discovered or have been proven to be wrong in some way.
I stopped celebrating Christmas, Thanksgiving, and even my birthday when I was twelve years of age.
My reason for doing so had absolutely nothing to do with any religious belief or outside influence, they were done purely out of personal feelings and rationalizations.
Many events in this society are commercialized or set within following traditions.
I have always been an unconventional individual, doing and behaving on my own terms according to my own nature and distinct mindset.
I do not, never have, and never will let society dictate what my values should be, how I conduct myself, or how I live my life.
I am not one to just go along with the program.
I still can and do, of course, acknowledge and respect the celebration of holidays and birthdays regarding others as I send out and accept cards or gifts from those who matter or who show kindness.
The thing is, I do not need one day out of a year to express love, the existence of life, appreciation for things, or the beauty of togetherness with those near and dear.
I send out cards, have given gifts, shown gratitude and spent meaningful time with loved ones as an ongoing periodic all year around basis.
To me, every day is a day to be grateful, to celebrate life, to share moments with those we love or care for, and so on.
I am not inspired by tradition because tradition does not inspire who I am.
The true meaning of Christmas itself is to celebrate the birth and life of Jesus Christ, but there is nothing wrong with attributing this day with merriment and gift-giving.
Still and all, the most precious gifts in life cannot be bought or sold wrapped up and used to eventually be thrown away. Some material possessions do last a lifetime, but people and connected relationships last forever.
The best gifts on earth we have are each other (the one or ones that you love and who sincerely love you whether it is a pet, a genuine friend, or a treasured family member.)
Whether one believes this or not, even if there is no one in your corner, all one truly needs is God as he will provide and secure your future as well as maintain your strength and character.
When we accept Jesus, we receive the most significant (vital) gift of all- eternity.
I am a very honest, straightforward person. If I say or write something it is because it is the truth, what I really think or believe, or suspect is possible.
Never do I or have I ever intentionally expressed anything under false pretense.
Some people may not understand what I mean or where I come from at times- depending on who it is- because I am a very deep, intelligent, and spiritual awake person.
Nevertheless, I speak my mind and am led by spirit to fulfill my purposes. I do know what I am talking about when I speak on things.
I am a forty-seven-year-old female who often gets mistaken for someone in her twenties or thirties. I have never really looked my age in body or in the face.
I even have a young sounding voice when I speak.
I have attracted men of all ages- young and old within the past.
When I was in my thirties eighteen-year-old guys were attracted to me, when I was in my twenties forty and fifty-year-old men were attracted to me.
It never made a difference. To each his or her own I never received any personal gratification from this attention I never wanted it.
Some men found me to be a challenge that they wanted to conquer. Some men just genuinely wanted to be with me because they liked me for my mind, and I was not like the average female once they got to know me a little.
I never placed value on myself based on whether a man approved or desired me. I have never suffered from low self-esteem and have never needed anyone to validate me or to build my assurance.
Self- confidence, self-love, and self-worth are things produced within me. No one gave it to me, and no one can take it away. Everyone should feel this way.
I have no interest in romantic relationships, I am asexual and proud.
Now I want to discuss this issue about Michael Gonzalez because I am being led to by spirit.
As I am a highly spiritually inclined individual I feel and keenly discern people’s energy.
Whenever a man, especially men who are of a negative disposition are attracted, or interested in me- I can feel them, their thoughts, and I can accurately sense things in relation to them in a timely frame.
Michael is an ex-coworker of mine who had, and who still has a “crush” on me. It is nothing serious, but it is annoying.
From the first moment I laid eyes on Michael, I did not find him to be attractive.
He is not a cute guy, and he is not handsome as far as I am concerned. A friend of mine had saw a photo of him and said that he was not attractive to her also but that he seems to think that he is something. Maybe there are low-scale females who find him attractive, however, I do not and never will.
I was very insulted when Michael reflected his insecurities onto me while we worked together by entertaining the ridiculous idea that I could be attracted or interested in him.
I told Michael to his face that I could not stand him, but his inflated ego did not want to believe or accept it even though deep down inside he knew it was the truth.
He even profiled in front of me one day on the job by trying to show off his body that was not appealing to me whatsoever. He got down onto the floor to demonstrate push-ups. The incident turned me off.
The more I had got to know Michael the more I disliked him.
When some men try to impress women, push themselves on them, or try to flaunt themselves when they mistakenly assume that the female likes them, they do not realize how much they make a fool of themselves. It is very off-putting.
When I was younger there were guys (usually low-scale guys because guys of substance do not behave in this manner) who would get angry at me for not wanting them and in return tell lies about me.
There were three who were a problem.
Two lied and said I was involved with them and all three wanted people to believe that I slept with them or had feelings for them- all to make themselves appear big in the eyes of their peers. And, to also try to bring me down since I thought too highly of myself to desire or to be with anyone like them.
Neither one of these guys were desirable they were used to low-scale women such as themselves falling all over them and making a fuss over them due to their own bouts of low self-esteem.
Someone like me, who was of substance and class, added an extra blow to the bruise they received to their egos when they got hurt and rejected by me.
Of course, their efforts did not work so they joined in with the effort to work Brujeria (Black magic/Santeria) on me to try to make me look bad within the public eye, however, I was still too strong, and I successfully defeated all of them at their own game. On top of it, karma came back and destroyed all three of them. One even ended up dead years ago from his negative lifestyle.
No one can bring me down as I never cared what anybody said or thought about me.
I did not have time for that type of bullshit then, and I do not tolerate it now.
Michael is not at all drastic to that extreme his nonsense is mild in comparison, yet still an act of ridiculous nonsense.
With all the serious things going on in the world Michael is hung up on the fact that he cannot attain me.
He would rather believe that I really do have feelings for him and am just fighting it, or that I am playing hard to get, or whatever other delusional bullshit that men feed themselves instead of facing the truth over dealing with reality.
Michael needs to forget about me and realize that a woman of my level and caliber would never be interested or attracted to him.
Michael has a lot of negative energy. He has a very low vibration.
I am a positive person I exude from a very high vibration.
What I also believe is a part of Michael’s insecurities stem from his background of being morbidly obese.
Maybe after he lost weight, he feels he needs something to prove and is overcompensating.
He needs women to be interested or attracted to him to feel like a big man. I just wish he would find some other female to win over to measure or to prove his false sense of pride.
The other women he has been with are easy tramps. He feels if he can get me then he can get anybody. I should in a way take this instance as a compliment, but I am not flattered by it, I am disgusted.
To me, Michael will always be a small, unworthy, pretentious smelly fish swimming in a dirty pond.
I am not trying to be mean I just do not understand the sickness behind and within certain men and women (because there are deceitful, trouble-making women too) who cannot deal with rejection.
A healthy-minded person does not occupy themself with stupid shit like this.
Even though I work constantly and am busy throughout the week I still find the time to write here and there.
When the energy is manifest, there is no way to stop what we are meant and inspired to do.
Nothing can ever get me down or out where I cannot write.
Time periods where I do not write for a while are natural intermission modes waved by spirit.
Everything needs a break or wrap-up as the season ends, begins, then restarts.
We never know where this journey in life may take us but whatever keeps us healthy and happy if it is just a small thing serves as a big outlet given to us by utilizing the purpose set before us.
In 1986 a man was going door to door on the block of my neighborhood looking for potential customers for the cable TV service that he worked for or represented.
I was ten or eleven at the time, excited at the chance to have the opportunity to watch a selection of cable channels as I was a huge young movie and television buff back then.
I called out to my mother after answering the door. She came downstairs and we both listened to his pitch.
The representative showed us a brochure of the service he promoted, offering us a choice of bundles along with prices.
My mother decided to purchase a cable plan.
The name of the service was BQ Cable- which stood for Brooklyn and Queens.
Later in the years- I do not remember exactly what year- BQ Cable was called Time Warner Cable.
Then later, after further years, to the current, the name of the service was changed to Spectrum Cable.
This instance reminds me of two other establishments from the past to the present.
When I was a little girl there was a bank titled Manufacturer Hanover.
This bank was later changed to Chemical Bank which now is called Chase.
There was also a telephone company called New York Telephone that eventually changed to NYNEX.
Afterwards, NYNEX became Bell Atlantic which is now called Verizon.
I know all this history for a fact because I and my family were with these companies (long time customers from the beginning) through their entire change of ownership and whatever else took place when these establishments expanded or advanced.
I remember in my early twenties when a guy from the old neighborhood I grew up in came up behind me in the 1990’s and uttered, “You love animals more than you love people”.
This was after news had gotten back to him that I had told a small crowd of guys on a street corner one night how ugly they were.
These guys used to act silly and harass me because I would not date them, so I had to put them in check.
Anyhow, the guy who came up behind me heard about the incident and called me a bitch.
If anything, I took “bitch” as a compliment even though he meant it as an insult. I was never the average type of female anyhow. I was very unique in many aspects.
When this guy saw that I did not respond to the word bitch, he knew the reason was because I did not care.
So, the next time he approached me it was about the regard I had for animals, as he would observe the moments, he saw me share in the neighborhood with my dogs.
He was correct. In general, I did care for animals (canines) more than I cared for people- and with good reason!
My two favorite individuals in the entire world were my mother and one of my dogs named Brandie.
Dogs are easier to like or love than most people. I am one who did not love easily to begin with, as I know the true definition of love.
Love in any instance should and has to come naturally.
There is a circle of few I call and who are true friends. There are even people around me who are good and trustworthy.
However, my mother and my dog are the ones who knew me best and who I both consider my friends for life from here on earth to beyond.
It is a jungle out there. People behave like savage wild beasts, while certain domesticated animals remain the calmest, loving, trusting, loyal, joyous and innocent creatures within existence. Some of us are prone to love and to care for our animals more than we do other people. Some of us even prefer them over other people. Our animals don’t care what we look like, what color we are, or anything else for that matter. All they care about is how we treat them, and even animals who get mistreated still give out undeserving volumes of unconditional love and affection. It may seem that our animals do better than us when it comes to being humane. They teach us a lot about love, forgiveness, and childlikeness. Attributes Jesus described, then he said, “I tell you the truth, unless you turn from your sins and become like little children, you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven. -Matthew 18:3 Our animals are very smart, observant, and crafty. We need them just as much as they need us. Perhaps the world would be a better place if our pets ruled. We surely could take quite a few significant lessons from them on how to behave and to treat one another. Thank God, he blessed us with canine companions and other animals of preference to adore and to share our homes with, because those furry buddies are the best things on the planet earth! Sincerely LaToya Lawrence
I do not understand people who claim that it hurts to talk about a relative who died. I love and enjoy speaking and reminiscing about the times we shared.
If the death of someone ever caused you pain, it is only because of the love you had for them. The more you loved them, the more it hurt, and that hurt feels so good!
Within that pain lies beauty. Beauty is the strength of that love. Love is the most beautiful thing in the world. I thank God for gifting me with such a strong spirit.
Our loved ones who died in Christ are not actually dead. They are alive and living well. In fact, they are doing far much better than we are! Yes, we love them, and we miss them. However, we should be very happy for them. They, by the grace of God, made it home to Jesus! That is a cause for celebration. They are residing in the peace and comfort of divine love.
The love we have for our dear ones could never compare to the love that God has for them. When we truly love them, we can willingly let them go, and that gives us such beautiful peace knowing them in such wonderful state of bliss. No more troubles in this perishing world they must endure. The most phenomenal thing we as believers and children of God recognize is that our deceased relatives are not people who are from our past. They are people who we know we will look forward to sharing the rest of our future in eternity with once we finally cross over. –latoya lawrence
There was a ridiculous double standard I used to hear when I was growing up, one that I knew definitely was not true because I myself naturally did not hold this particular stance.
I used to hear how, when it came to intercourse, how, for females, it would take emotion to be involved for her to become engaged, or that, after a sexual encounter, she would become emotionally attached.
Such a bunch of sexists, insulting nonsense!
I am not saying to hop around for the hell of it for those who burn with lust or the occasional desire for some to have sex, or to have sex for the sole purpose of having a child- as I once considered just using a man to conceive a baby many years ago without any commitment or affection on my part.
What I am saying as a fact is that for a “Virgin” or a woman who is constantly sexually active, or that has been sexually active not too often, she does not necessarily have to have any interest at all in a particular man for her to be able to have sex with him.
It does not mean that she cares for him, and it definitely does not mean that she has any love for him.
Sex and love have nothing to do with one another. They are both two separate things.
Women can have sex with men without having any type of attraction or feelings for them- and without any guilt.
I definitely know this all for a fact.
Some men may not have understood or wanted to have accepted this reality because they were always stereotypically viewed as the ones who primarily used women to get what they wanted. So, it was too much of a bruise to the ego.
Truth is, as it is more out in the open these days- though there are still some with ignorant concepts- it works both ways.
There are men who become emotionally attached through sex whereas others do not, and vice-versa with certain women.
Some men or women do have to have feelings for someone before they go to bed with them.
A woman who has sex with a man who she does not love or care for does not make her a whore either, because there are many different types of circumstances that take place within situations.
Men who are whorish do not normally get called the undesirable whores that they truly are by the majority of society.
There are married couples without love within a marriage. To each his or her own.
Yes, when it comes to God, he intended for intercourse to be between couples tied together through wedlock. Anything outside of this is wrong or immoral to God. He also intended true consideration and dedication to each other. That is why marriage was not to be entered into lightly.
However, we all have our own free-will, gifts, and characteristics.
Some of us are asexual and are completely not into sex. Asexuality is not a sin. Some of us do not want to ever get married. Some want a loving, faithful, life-long relationship. Some just want to run around or have sex without strings attached.
There are possible consequences to actions sometimes, such as venereal disease, crazy people with fatal attractions, violent confrontations over cheating, unwanted pregnancies.
Some of these incidents even take place with married couples.
This is a crazy-mixed up world.
I, as a woman, personally wished that there was no such thing as sexual intercourse and that, as a woman, I would be able to conceive a child naturally on my own if I ever decided to (although I did not or would not want any children at this time in my life- but if I ever had a long time ago). I feel I should not have to share my vagina with anyone, and I know I did not ever have to, my vagina belongs to me.
A little note: There is an actual fish in creation that is by nature able to conceive offspring on its own without the fertilization from a male counterpart.
We had some fun and fabulous toys made of excellent quality back then.
I had a lot of items to play with, too many to name.
To mention a few that I loved and enjoyed was The Fisher Price Movie Viewer.
I only had the Snow White, Sesame Street (Cookie Monster in the kitchen), and Mickey Mouse (Lonesome Ghosts) cartridges.
This particular tool was great because we could view the animated films forward and backward, either fast or slow.
The Tree Tots by Kenner were one of my very favorites. I had the Treehouse, the Lighthouse, and the Amusement Park!
The little Tots and their dog were awesome!
I constantly sniffed my adorable Strawberry Shortcake and Lemon Meringue dolls as they were sweetly scented with fragrance.
I had the adorable Snail that would move on its own as it rode Strawberry Shortcake and her friend in the attached carriage.
Dancerella was a ballerina that stood on her toes and actually spun around in poses. I played with her a lot.
When I was growing up, we were not like the kids today who play with a new toy for a short time, get tired of it, then want a different new toy to play with.
No matter what additional toy was added to our collection, we played with the old and new ones all year around for years until we completely wore them out- I know I did.
I still had some of my old toys into my adulthood stored away before I moved from my childhood home.
We will never have toys and other objects such as the ones that we had back in the day when everything was so exciting.
I am sure the generation before me feels the same way about the era they were born and grew up in.
I just want to acknowledge that when any of you “like” my posts or leave a comment, if I do not immediately respond or respond back in a timely manner, I definitely will eventually. I do not ignore or disregard anyone who takes out the time to read my posts unless nothing is required or really needs to be said.
I also wanted to acknowledge that I have read many WordPress bloggers whose posts I have really enjoyed, but I was unable to like their post or leave a comment due to their “like” button not displayed and the comment section being disabled as they don’t accept comments. Some people’s websites don’t even load up all of the time. It could be my browser or the site is not available or is temporarily unavailable. I appreciate your kindness and interactive regard within our community. I am not the type to just read or like someone’s post just for someone to come read mine. As I have said many times in the past, if nobody came to read my blogs, I would still write. This is also why I may not respond right away.
I like to take my time when I have the time to thoroughly and thoughtfully read through posts to give honest responses. If I “like” or leave a comment, it comes from genuineness. So, whenever I have the free time, I will definitely get back to you all- not that any of you need or are necessarily looking for my feedback- I appreciate your visits and that you enjoy some of my writings or find them interesting. All, have a blessed day.
Everyone has the right to think or believe what they choose to believe in.
Some believe in certain things, some do not, some are undecided because they honestly do not know whether or not a particular thing exists, and some really do not care one way or the other.
We all have our own nature and experience.
What is right for one person may be wrong for the next person.
Some are inclined to what draws them, a propensity toward what falls into place.
A lady was offended over a post I wrote a few days ago with regard to reincarnation (soul ties).
She got mad or was disappointed at me for stating my viewpoint on the matter.
She tried to get back at me by insinuating, because I do not agree with the notion of people coming back to earth throughout the centuries, that I must not actually be born of preternatural ability.
And, that I have a lot to learn due to my nonchalant attitude in regard to her response, which she also took as me being rude or arrogant.
I notice a lot of times people take other people’s comments/posts out of context or as coming off negatively when they do not personally know the person. Every detail, explanation, or essence of a person’s entirety cannot, will not, and should not be displayed or assumed in any single post.
I admit I did not care as her lack of knowledge is of no insult to me. No one’s thoughts or words can erase the truth or discredit someone else’s ability due to their own misconceptions or idle pettiness.
If I do not believe in reincarnation, then I don’t believe in it. I never will- and my third eye, sixth sense, extra sensory perception- whatever one wants to call it, has always been there and will remain.
God’s gifts are irrevocable even if others put labels on them or name them incorrectly. A spiritual gift of insight is the ability to extraordinarily “know, see, feel, hear, taste, smell, and think within communication.
But God will redeem me from the realm of the dead; he will surely take me to himself. -Psalms 49:15
“So it will be with the resurrection of the dead. The body that is sown is perishable, it is raised imperishable; it is sown in dishonor, it is raised in glory; it is sown in weakness, it is raised in power; it is sown a natural body, it is raised a spiritual body.” -1 Corinthians 15:42-45
“Jesus said to her, ‘I am the resurrection and the life. Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die.’ ” -John 11:25-26
And just as each person is destined to die once and after that comes judgment, so also Christ was offered once for all time as a sacrifice to take away the sins of many people. He will come again, not to deal with our sins, but to bring salvation to all who are eagerly waiting for him. -Hebrews 9:27-28
I did not need the Bible or a verse to indicate to me that reincarnation was not a course of purpose in life.
I never believed in the idea of having lived past lives over and again, not even as a child or teen (though attitudes and beliefs may sometimes change as we evolve) did I think reincarnation sounded right. The notion made no sense to me.
I do not care how many people claim to remember living previous lives before, or the so-called scientific proof behind it.
I am not at all saying that some of these people are not being honest. I just believe there is another explanation.
They may have either had a vision, or visions, of someone else’s life from another timeline, possibly confusing it with a connection to their own.
Their mind could be playing tricks on them as memory can at times be unreliable.
Satan can also be at play, as he and his demons have the ability to masquerade and take on the appearance of people, places and events through false representation.
I do not have all the answers. I do not know everything, and I don’t claim to, or want to.
Nevertheless, I walk by faith and not by sight. I believe in what I cannot see because I am spiritually “awake”. I have always been aware. I have had many encounters of witnessing God’s power, even when I was full of doubt in regard to particular situations.
When the spirits of Moses and Elijah appeared and were witnessed, they were in their original likeness after they had long passed away, having lived only one life on this earth.
I personally am glad there is no coming back and forth into this imperfect, fallen world. Who in their right mind would want to keep repeatedly living in this world full of ruin? Why would God send Jesus to die for us if this was so?
I like God’s version of the truth better. Once I die, the only next life I will enter along with other believers by God’s grace is eternity in the afterlife with my creator.
Six days later Jesus took Peter and the two brothers, James and John, and led them up a high mountain to be alone.
As the men watched, Jesus’ appearance was transformed so that his face shone like the sun, and his clothes became as white as light.
Suddenly, Moses and Elijah appeared and began talking with Jesus.
Peter exclaimed, “Lord, it’s wonderful for us to be here! If you want, I’ll make three shelters as memorials —one for you, one for Moses, and one for Elijah.”
But even as he spoke, a bright cloud overshadowed them, and a voice from the cloud said, “This is my dearly loved Son, who brings me great joy. Listen to him.”
The disciples were terrified and fell face down on the ground.
Then Jesus came over and touched them. “Get up,” he said. “Don’t be afraid.”
And when they looked up, Moses and Elijah were gone, and they saw only Jesus. -Matthew 17:1-8
I am not a mother. I had been told I would make a good mother if I had children, and I took the remark as a compliment.
Some may even consider me wife material, which can serve as a compliment or an insult, depending on what one’s idea is based on.
I never saw myself as marriage material, as I never had the desire or interest in romance or for stereotypical wifely duties-this nature was never within me.
The old barefoot, pregnant, in the kitchen, outdated image of wife-hood was definitely not a suitable way of life for me either.
Things have changed in this day and age and the definition of wife-material does not necessarily have to be a negative one.
Many secure men appreciate strong, independent women who can hold their own and who can also show love, support and maintain a healthy relationship that produces meaning and growth.
Most of us heard the saying, “You can’t turn a hoe into a housewife”.
Well, I say one cannot turn a virgin or one who is not into sex as a housewife either.
How many sexual partners one has had or not had does not determine one’s sufficiency. It is about one’s mentality and character.
I always knew that my self-esteem or self-worth/value as a female was not defined or dictated by my vagina or men I have never slept with.
Nor did my self-esteem or self-worth depend on what a man or anyone else classified as what was appropriate within their own personal or societal standards.
My vagina is not me; it is only a part of the body that belongs to me. I am the spirit within me, I am an individual having this human experience here on earth.
It is a great offense to suggest that any positive qualities a woman may have are only prized or treasured if a man prefers or desires them.
There are women who have no interest in satisfying a man.
They have no desire to marry or to be in a committed relationship.
Some women are intent on or concerned about developing their own careers, their own personal/spiritual growth, or the fulfillment of what they may want to offer or contribute to the world through their own special purpose.
These types of women do not need the acceptance or approval of a man to feel self-worth and value.
“Ask me and I will tell you remarkable secrets you do not know about things to come.” -Jeremiah 33:3 nlt
“Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.” -Jeremiah 33:3 esv
Some of us are naturally born with certain spiritual gifts/talents and some may acquire them later on through the Holy Spirit once they receive Jesus Christ as their Lord and savior.
God speaks to us in many different ways and he still sends us messages and warnings of insight through visions, dreams, thoughts and so on.
Every open door is not from God and every closed door is not from the devil/Satan.
Wisdom, discernment, and prayer will always bring truth into the light as well as mysteries that are unknown when we have our own distinct relationship with God.
“Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world.
This is how you can recognize the Spirit of God:
Every spirit that acknowledges that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God, but every spirit that does not acknowledge Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you have heard is coming and even now is already in the world.
You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.
They are from the world and therefore speak from the viewpoint of the world, and the world listens to them.
We are from God, and whoever knows God listens to us; but whoever is not from God does not listen to us. This is how we recognize the Spirit of truth and the spirit of falsehood. -1John 4:1-6
“Very truly I tell you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be judged but has crossed over from death to life. -John 5:24
We get eternal life by putting our trust in Jesus.
The gift of being saved cannot be earned. It cannot be attained by doing good deeds, or by being what we perceive as good.
It cannot be gotten by going to church either.
It is only by truly believing in and putting all our trust in Jesus.
Eternal life does not begin once a believer dies and their soul leaves the body.
Eternal life begins immediately while we are still alive in body here on earth, the moment we genuinely accept Jesus as Lord over our lives.
When one is “truly saved”, they are always saved, even if they walk away from God for a while due to anger or misunderstanding, because if one is truly a child of God’s, they will always find their way back to him or he will eventually bring them back through his call.
God knows how to reach an individual whereas others cannot. He knows our story, he understands us, he knows our hearts, he knows us better than anyone else does- he created us as he knitted us together within our mother’s wombs. We were in his thoughts before the creation of the world.
When I was furious at God, I swore I disowned him and that I would never have anything to do with him ever again. The Lord sure showed me differently!
He did not let me go so easily or at all, for that matter. He let time go by- letting me believe I was protected by other means when it was him all along, ultimately protecting me through what I substituted. He proved to me that he had my back when I felt betrayed by him.
It took a tragedy for him to get my attention- and God did his action in such a loving and wonderful way. I am still in shock till this day- he is really awesome.
I still at times have my “God why did you bring me into this world the way that it is nowadays” and “I did not ask to come here; sin was here way before I was born, so why bring me into it?!”
God is my parent as I am still a work in progress when it comes to certain issues that involve not liking certain types of people and life circumstances in general, and so on. However, that is what he wants. For us to give everything all to him.
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. –Romans 8:38-39
"My Voice" Weblog By Miss LaToya Lawrence 